Coaching Skills for Managers Program Overview

1、Coaching Skills for EducatorsMarjorie Shore M.S.W.Coaching Skills for EducatorsPrepared for theThe Coaching Institute for Literacy and Numeracy LeadersAugust 23, 2006 Marjorie Shore M.S.W.The Coaching C416-787- Learning ObjectivesnEnhance Leadership AbilitynReview Coaching SkillsnKey skills nCoachin

2、g RelationshipnProcessnCommunication, building trust and rapport, listening skills, approach and technique, influencing and directing Managers are responsible for implementing a plan. Leaders grow the dream and enroll people to help achieve it.Leading vs. Managing nLeadingnAim is positive changenSet

3、ting directionnAligning people to visionnMotivatingnCoaching nManagingnAim is predictable, orderly resultsnOrganizingnStaffing nPlanningnBudgetingnSolving problemsFocus on your GoalsnIf we were meeting here three years from today and all was going very well in your coaching role, how would you descr

4、ibe your vision of you as a coach.nDescribe what you see as if through the lens of a camera.Coaching is cultivation, like gardening Peter SengeDefinitions: Coaching, Counseling, Mentoring, & TrainingnCoaching focuses on improving skills. ncan address issues of know how, know when, know why, motivati

5、on, time, distraction, priorities, support. nCounseling is coaching that focuses on peace of mind.nMentoring is coaching about career and relationships with people and the organization.nTraining is skill building from the ground up.A man sooner or later discovers that he is the master-gardener of hi

6、s soul, the director of his life. James AllenCoaching is CultivationnPeter Senge asks organizations to operate like gardens rather than like machines.n“We need to move to a “gardening” model: cultivate and grow people rather than fix them.”nCoaching is the gardening tool to cultivate skills.Bad habi

7、ts are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of. UnknownGroup Exercise AnBreak into groups.nWork in your groups to define nSeven features of a good coaching relationship.nThink about coaches you have admired.Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to

8、 get out of. UnknownGroup Exercise BnBreak into groups.nWork in your groups to definenSeven habits, qualities, attributes or traits of a good coach.nThink about coaches you have admired.I don like that man. Im going to have to get to know him better. Abraham LincolnGroup Exercise CnBreak into groups

9、.nWork in your groups to define the process of coaching nThe five step process of how a coaching relationship unfolds over time; what happens first, then the rest of the sequence25 of the Things Coaches Do1.Beacon2.Radar3.Alarm Clock4.Patient5.Flexible6.Honest Self-Perception7.Confront8.Sell9.Help P

10、ush Envelope10.Motivate11.Cheerlead12.Optimistic13.Subject Expert14.Director15.Helping Hand16.Hear Venting17.Gardener18.Notice Success19.Honest20.Confident21.Consistent22.Mindful23.Guide 24.Mirror25.Evolutionary ElderThe Coach in YounCurrent Strengthsn n n n n n n nOpportunitiesn n n n n n n The Sto

11、ry of RosenList the five characters in order of most favorite to least favorite and be prepared to defend your choice.1. Rose2. Jon3. Peter4. Dan5. GeorgeReview of Listening Skills1. Be physically attentive2. Participate to acknowledge youve heard3. Acknowledge feelings or transition opportunities4.

12、 Ask thoughtful questionsFive Ways to Communicate Better1.Consider compromise. 2.Another persons view of reality may be as real as your own.3.Never assume that you know what the other person is thinking, or what they have done.4.Check out your assumptions. Ask questions. Do not correct anothers stat

13、ement of his/her feelings. 5.Be specific when you introduce a comment. Five More Ways to Communicate Better6.Ask for a reasonable change. 7.Try substituting and for but. nBut tends to negate anything that went before.nAnd includes both sides of the statement.8.Ensure that your body language is congr

14、uent with your message. 9.When receiving constructive feedback consider it carefully and with a balanced approach. 10.Remember that others opinions of you are not always true Coaching Process One Model1. Prepare in advance: requirements, opportunities, motivations, history2. Agree on goals3. Be a ma

15、p-maker; Get commitmentsdiscuss motivations and opportunities, define processset time guidelinescreate a contract 4. CoachPick time & space carefullyBuild rapport & trustProvide challenge Use action based language; who, what, whenBuild positive expectationsEncourage generouslyCelebrate success5. Rev

16、iew & Decide Next Steps Coaching Process One Model1. Prepare in advancenrequirements,nopportunities,nmotivations,nhistoryngather informationnseparately and togetherCoaching Process One Model2. Agree on goalsnSMART: specific, measurable, achievable, relevant & timely. nConditions brought about by act

17、ion.nSmall & large outcomes.nGaps to be filled.nKnow what success will look like.Coaching Process One Model3. Be a map-makernPlan the route in advance; determining the milestones; To help steer towards the goals To park tangentsnGet commitmentsnDiscuss motivations and opportunities, nDefine processn

18、Set timelinesnCreate a contract, if requiredCoaching Process One Model4. CoachnPick your time and space.nCoach privately away from distractions and interruptions.nBuild rapportnGet conversation going with small or soft talknBuild trustnClarify rolesnPromise an absence of vulnerabilitynListen; ask qu

19、estions, paraphrase, acknowledgeCoaching Process One ModelnProvide challengenAsk the coachee to reach. nCreate levels of success, between perfection and failure, that can be rewarded. nUse action based language.nWho is to act? What will they do? Be precise. Describe what a camera would see.nWith wha

20、t frequency & duration?nAt what intervals?Coaching Process One ModelnBuild positive expectations.nJointly determine barriers and how to overcome each.nContinually focus on potential positive results.nCultivatenOffer ideas, know how, wisdom, experience, stories, directionnMotivate with encouragementC

21、oaching Process One Model5. Review and Decide Next Steps nMeasure progress toward goals at scheduled intervalsnAdjust the plan/map as necessarynCelebratenDissolve the relationship when appropriate.nMutuallynWith loose ends tiednWith a method to re-startCommunicating: Six Things You Can Do to Build T

22、rusting Relationships1.Create an absence of vulnerability, a cone of safety.2.Show confidence.3.Appreciate individual skills and success. 4.Show up on time. 5.Do what you say you will.6.Dont use dont. Do use do.Generational Differences in MotivatorsnMotivators tend to be generation based.nWhat do we

23、 know about motivating the different generations?Where the Generations Clash:MotivationWho WantVeteransSatisfaction of job well doneBoomersMoney, title, corner officeGeneration XFreedom, securityNexusWork that has meaning for themSource: When Generations Collide, Lancaster and Stillman Tools for coa

24、chingnWhat to do when you dont know what to do!Taking ControlControl the things you can control so you can effectively manage the things you cant controlPersonal Power Grid ControlCant controlActSituation masteryCeaseless strivingDont ActGiving upLetting go What Can You Control?nYour AttitudenYour V

25、ision nYour Energy LevelnYour Response to StressnYour SpaceLetting Go PossibilitiesnMental beliefs; opinions, expectations, obsessionsnPhysically; active process of relaxationnEmotionally; anger, fear, guiltnBehaviorally; change habits that dont helpLetting Go Examplesnneed to be perfectnowning resp

26、onsibilitynvs. taking responsibilitynneed to be liked by everyonencant say nondo everything yourselfndoing what doesnt worknnever ending thinkingnanger nguiltnphysical tightnessnwanting so muchPersonal Power Grid: Case Studies1.You have made arrangements with a friend. You had to rearrange your sche

27、dule in order to meet your commitment to the friend. Fifteen minutes before the time you were to meet, the friend calls to say that they cant make it, something came up at work. This is the 3rd time in 3 months this has happened. What do you do?2.Your supervisor is demanding and has high expectation

28、s. They never provide feedback or praise. They always find whats missing. You also have high standards but never seem to meet their expectations. What do you do?The Personal Power Grid Exercise1. Write about a situation that you are struggling with that fits into the grid.2. What part of the struggl

29、e is in your control? 3. What action can you take to move into Situation Mastery: Action orientation?4. What action can you take to move into Situation Mastery: Letting Go?5. What action can you take to leave this in Ceaseless Striving or Giving Up.“It is not the strongest species that will survive

30、but that which has the greatest capacity to adapt.”Charles DarwinClosing ThoughtThank You!Marjorie ShoreThe Coaching Clinic416-787- Appendices 1.Eight Donts of Coaching2.Features of Coaching Relationships3.The Habits, Qualities, Attributes and Traits of a Good CoachEight Donts of CoachingnDont use t

31、axi talknDont be ambiguousnDont try for giant stepsnDont allow transferencenDont be a devils advocatenDont do the work for the person being coachednDont stick to original goals when better goals emergenDont focus only on performance, focus on the person as wellEight Donts of CoachingnDont use taxi t

32、alk.nTaxi talk is aimless assessments, observations, judgments and opinions. nStick with action talk; e.g. who does what, by when.nDont be ambiguous nAvoid vague, non-specific wording and phrases that are easily misunderstood.Eight Donts of CoachingnDont try for giant steps.nYoull get there faster w

33、ith a series of baby steps.nEach successful step will produce motivating energynDont allow transference.nRecognize the individuality of the person being coached. They are not you.nConsider what actions they can take. Dont project your abilities on them.Eight Donts of CoachingnDont be a devils advoca

34、te.nLook for and emphasize the positive. nRecognize failure as learning and create new action ideasnDont do the work for the person being coached.nThe coach imparts wisdom.nTogether the coach and person being coached think, shape, invent, decide . . .nThe person being coached takes the action steps.

35、Features of Coaching RelationshipsSpecificOpportunisticTime sensitiveSupportiveMotivatingObjectiveApoliticalPerformance orientedSupports corporate competenciesA leveraging strategyFeatures of Coaching RelationshipsnSpecificnCoaching can focus on what is needed most.nOpportunisticnCoaching can produc

36、e beneficial effects right now. nTime sensitivenCoaching can be delivered just in time. When it is needed, not too soon or too late.nMotivatingnCoaches motivate via stimulation, inspiration and persistence.Features of Coaching RelationshipsnSupportivenCoaches help the person they are coaching use ex

37、isting skills better.nObjectivenCoaching ought to be an objective outside point of view.nThe coachs experience helps them to see the opportunity with more clarity.nA leveraging strategynCoaching focuses on specifics i.e. just enough learning to help the right people people make precise changes.Features of Coaching RelationshipsnApolitical nCoaching can occur outside the normal office atmosphere.nOriented to performancenCoaching focuses on fin