Catalyst Case Studies：催化剂的案例研究.doc

Catalyst Case StudiesCase Study 1A church member makes an appointment with the pastor and arrives a few minutes before the appointed time. The pastor welcomes in the member, who pulls a list from a folder and after a few moments of “how are you doing?” conversation jumps right in.Member: “Now I dont know what you know about this but we have been participating in this mission project for twenty years. Ive heard that you might not want us to do it.”“I have some concerns about how junky the entry way of the church looks. I think you should talk to the trustees about it.”“So and So called me this week. She isnt getting her newsletter. Please make sure she gets it.”“The committee Im on would like to come to the Council meeting to talk about our need for more volunteers. Would you please tell the Council chair to add us to the agenda? Ill be honest with you, he isnt my favorite person.”Questions: What is happening here? What type of communication is the church member practicing? What does the church member do well? What is unhealthy about this conversation? How should the pastor respond? Where do you see yourself in this case study?Case Study 2Three siblings plan mothers 60th birthday weekend.On phone:Middle child: I talked to our younger brother today. He cant be there on Thursday but is willing to fly in on Friday.Oldest: You know I have to work on Fridays. And, the more I think about this I realize that Im the one paying the most to get there.Middle: What do you want me to do about it? I just want us all to be in the same place at the same time!Oldest: Well, tell our brother that he has to take Thursday off work!Middle: Why are you always putting me in the middle! Why dont you call him yourself?!Oldest: You know we dont talk very often. It is just easier when you talk to him already.Middle: Ill call him again and see what we can do.By e-mail:Middle: Hey, I just got off the phone with our sister. She is so upset. She wants you to take Thursday off because she cant miss Friday. Let me know how you feel about this. Oh, and we decided that we would go to a show. We will need to pay for moms ticket so it is going to cost about $200 per couple. I hope this is okay.Brother: Hi, You know my wife has been laid off for six months. We are already flying up there for the weekend and that is expensive! I was told that if we came up everything else would be paid for. Now you add a show?! I bet this was _s idea!Middle: Hi, I just want us to get together. Well work something out. You should just talk to _ and then you can get it figured out. Ill do whatever you two want to do. Im willing to travel or whatever. This started as such a nice idea.Over phone:Middle: You should just call him. Figure it out with him. Ill go anywhere, anytime. Oldest: Okay. I will.Middle: You know this bothers me so much. I just wish we all lived close together. All I can think about is when everyone has kids and my kids cant play with their cousins because they live so far apart. You need to move down here.Oldest: You know that isnt going to happen right now. Well figure this party out. I thought it would be so easy.Middle: And, are you going to be able to come home for Christmas this year? You know it has been a couple of years.Oldest: How about we figure out this weekend first. Weve got a couple of months before Christmas.Questions: Where do you see yourself in this case study? Is triangulation present? Where? When? What is healthy? What is unhealthy? What could have been said to make these conversations healthy? Which sibling is the best at self-differentiation? Case Study 3A wedding invitation for the wifes cousin arrives in the mail. She asks her husband if he wants to take a week of vacation to go to the wedding and maybe camp on the way there. A couple weeks later she mentions it again. His consistent response, I dont know what is happening at work that week yet. She encourages him to put the date on his calendar anyway. Six weeks before the wedding the wife decides she really wants to go to this wedding. She asks her husband again and learns that he has scheduled a work related event for that weekend. He cant go. After thinking on it for a day she decides she will take the week of vacation time, flying instead of camping, and plan some other family visits while she is on the road. She sends an email with her flight itinerary to her husbands email account. She also leaves him a voice message, “Hi, I went ahead and booked a flight to the wedding. Ill be gone_. Check your email for the exact dates.” Husband: One week before she leaves, the husband opens the email from his wife. He comes home from work, “Youre going to that wedding?”Wife: “Yeah, I told you several weeks ago. I decided it was something important to me.”Husband: “But youll be gone for a whole week.”Wife: “Yup, I have some family down there so Im going to stay with them for a few days too.”Husband: “Yeah, but you wont be here.”Wife: “Thats right. You can still choose to fly down for the wedding or even the week after.”Husband: “What am I going to do for a whole week without you?”Wife: “Eat out, work late, make your own schedule, stay up as late as you want.”Husband: “Im just really going to miss you. Why didnt you tell me you were going away?”Questions: What