瓦尔登湖美文翻译.doc

This small lake was of most value as a neighbor in the intervals of a gentle rain-storm in August, when, both air and water being perfectly still, but the sky overcast, mid-afternoon had all the serenity(宁静) of evening, and the wood thrush （画眉鸟）sang around, and was heard from shore to shore. 八月里，在轻柔的斜风细雨暂停的时候，这小小的湖做我的邻居，最为珍贵，那时水和空气都完全平静了，天空中却密布着乌云，下午才过了一半却已具备了一切黄昏的肃穆，而画眉在四周唱歌，隔岸相闻。A lake like this is never smoother than at such a time; and the clear portion of the air above it being, shallow and darkened by clouds, the water, full of light and reflections, becomes a lower heaven itself so much the more important. 这样的湖，再没有比这时候更平静的了；湖上的明净的空气自然很稀薄，而且给乌云映得很黯淡了，湖水却充满了光明和倒影，成为一个下界的天空，更加值得珍视。From a hill-top near by, where the wood had been recently cut off, there was a pleasing vista （远景）southward across the pond, through a wide indentation（凹陷） in the hills which form the shore there, where their opposite sides sloping toward each other suggested a stream flowing out in that direction through a wooded valley, but stream there was none. 从最近被伐木的附近一个峰顶上向南看，穿过小山间的巨大凹处，看得见隔湖的一幅愉快的图景，那凹处正好形成湖岸，那儿两座小山坡相倾斜而下，使人感觉到似有一条溪涧从山林谷中流下，但是，却没有溪涧。That way I looked between and over the near green hills to some distant and higher ones in the horizon, tinged with blue. Indeed, by standing on tiptoe I could catch a glimpse of some of the peaks of the still bluer and more distant mountain ranges in the northwest, those true-blue coins from heavens own mint, and also of some portion of the village. 我是这样地从近处的绿色山峰之间和之上，远望一些蔚蓝的地平线上的远山或更高的山峰的。真的，踮起了足尖来，我可以望见西北角上更远、更蓝的山脉，这种蓝颜色是天空的染料制造厂中最真实的出品，我还可以望见村镇的一角。 But in other directions, even from this point, I could not see over or beyond the woods which surrounded me. It is well to have some water in your neighborhood, to give buoyancy（浮力） to and float the earth. 但是要换一个方向看的话，虽然我站得如此高，却给郁茂的树木围住，什么也看不透，看不到了。在邻近，有一些流水真好，水有浮力，地就浮在上面了。One value even of the smallest well is, that when you look into it you see that earth is not continent but insular（隔绝的、孤立的）. This is as important as that it keeps butter cool. 便是最小的井也有这一点值得推荐，当你窥望井底的时候，你发现大地并不是连绵的大陆；而是隔绝的孤岛。这是很重要的，正如井水之能冷藏牛油。When I looked across the pond from this peak toward the Sudbury meadows（草地）, which in time of flood I distinguished elevated （提高的）perhaps by a mirage（海市蜃楼） in their seething（沸腾的）valley, like a coin in a basin, all the earth beyond the pond appeared like a thin crust（外壳） insulated and floated even by this small sheet of intervening water, and I was reminded that this on which I dwelt （居住）was but dry land.当我的目光从这一个山顶越过湖向萨德伯里草原望过去的时候，在发大水的季节里，我觉得草原升高了，大约是蒸腾的山谷中显示出海市蜃楼的效果，它好像沉在水盆底下的一个天然铸成的铜币，湖之外的大地都好像薄薄的表皮，成了孤岛，给小小一片横亘的水波浮载着，我才被提醒，我居住的地方只不过是干燥的土地。1) mid-afternoon。对于midsummer，mid autumn 等，汉语有“盛夏”“仲秋”对等词，可是mid-afternoon一词却没有，徐译“下午才过了一半”虽是解释性翻译，也算一法。王译“下午三点时分”都精确到“时”与“分”了。遇到一种语言里有而另一语言里却无的情形，让人对译者“挖空”“绞尽”的努力，深表同情。2) the clear portion of the air above it being, shallow and darkened by clouds 这句中“being”后的逗号是多出的，外文出版社的原文中也有，而Jeffrey Cramer注本中就没有。3) Indeed, by standing on tiptoe I could catch a glimpse of some of the peaks of the still bluer and more distant mountain ranges in the northwest, those true-blue coins from heavens own mint, and also of some portion of the village. 更蓝更远山脉上的一些峰峦，是天堂硬币撒落人间。徐译“这种蓝颜色是天空的染料制造厂中最真实的出品”，漏掉了“coins”一词而把起定语作用的“true-blue”当成了主语，“mint”也由“造币厂”改成了“染料制造厂”。戴译“这真正的纯蓝色得自天堂的恩赐”也类似，把“纯蓝色”作主语而漏了“硬币”，还漏了“造币厂”。“and also of some portion of the village”是接前面“catch a glimpse of”的。戴译“我还望见了乡村的远景”，其中“远景”在原文中找不到。4) which in time of flood I distinguished elevated perhaps by a mirage in their seething valley是说在泄洪季节，草原好像比平时高，并不是 “向萨德伯里草原眺望时，草场上正遭洪水淹没（戴译）”。 Jeffrey注曰：The Concord and Sudbury rivers over?ow their banks during the spring. 5) all the earth beyond the pond应该是“（从湖这边望去，）湖那边的大地”。6) dry land是与湖、水、湿相对的，圣经创世记里译为“旱地”：“神说，天下的水要聚在一处，使旱地露出来，事就这样成了。”（And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry land appear: and it was so.）7) 梭罗的写作时常谈着一件事忽而跳到另一事，有时将科学、宗教、诗意、幽默揉在一起，很多读者读起来都感到困难。对此，Ken Kifer就评道：Looking at the structure of this paragraph, Thoreau seems to drift from one idea to another without a plan. He would surely get a poor grade for it in Freshman English. However, he first makes the pond alive and real and then takes us up on a hill for a broader view and finally connects the pond to the oceans. Thoreaus statements beginning with it is well to have some water in your neighborhood illustrate a feature of his writing that creates problems for many readers: he does not clearly distinguish between his scientific, spiritual, poetic, and humorous points of view, leaving it to the reader to make that distinction. Here, the statement about butter is plainly humorous, but the rest seems to mix the scientific and the transcendental outlook. His statements show his awareness of the water table; in fact, lowering the water table in some areas can cause the ground to sink. Continental shelves and sea level are approximately the same height, almost as if the continents are floating.（戴欢译）这小小的湖做我最珍贵的邻居，当在8月间。柔和的微风细雨停歇之时，此时的空气和水幽静得近乎完美，但乌云仍在天空密布。下午刚过了一半，黄昏的肃静已经浸透了湖光山色，而画眉鸟的歌声四处响起，隔岸相闻。这样的湖，何时还会像此时这般的宁静啊！湖上清透的空气被乌云变得暗淡起来，湖水却充盈着光辉，倒映出一个低垂的天际，显得弥足珍贵。从不远处树林刚被砍伐的一个峰顶上向南俯瞰过去，群山之间的一个宽阔的低凹处，恰好形成了湖岸，两岸的山坡错落有致，倾斜直下，宛如一条葱郁的溪流从密林的山谷中畅流而出，这是一幅多么舒心的景色，但那溪流却是臆想出来的。我就是这样，从不远处的绿色群山之间或者之上，去眺望那蔚蓝的地平线上的遥远山峦或更高的山峰。确实，我踮起脚尖来，便可一眼望见西北方向那些更遥远、蓝色更深的山脉。这真正的纯蓝色得自天堂的恩赐。我还望见了乡村的远景。若是换了其他方向，即使仍站在原来的观景点，茂密的森林也会四处挡住了我的视线，森林之上或之外的美景是不可一见的。在邻近的地方，有一些流水真让人惬意，水的浮力将地面也浮了起来。即便最小的水井也有这点值得珍视，当你探头窥井时，你会发现大地并非是一款连绵不绝的大陆，而是水中隔绝的孤岛。水井的这一特点，与井水能冰镇奶油一样值得珍视。当我的目光越过湖面，从这个峰顶向萨德伯里草原眺望时，草场上正遭洪水淹没，整个草场看上去像被升高了一样，或许是因为沸腾的山谷中海市蜃楼显出的效应，它宛如沉在水盆底部的一枚硬币，湖水之外的陆地犹如一层单薄的外壳，被小小的一片水潭分隔开来，并被浮力托起。我这才猛然想到，我的安身之地只不过是块“干燥的土地”。以下是同学们的译文：This small lake was of most value as a neighbor in the intervals of a gentle rain-storm in August, when, both air and water being perfectly still, but the sky overcast, mid-afternoon had all the serenity of evening, and the wood thrush sang around, and was heard from shore to shore.在风雨轻柔的八月间，与这小小的湖泊为邻是最为珍贵的事了。因为此时，空气和水都完全静止了，天空却乌云密布，午后已经拥有夜间那样的平静了。画眉鸟四处啼鸣，声音传遍了湖岸。As a neighbor 我们开始翻译的是作为邻居，后来觉得与湖做邻居不太恰当，就改成了与为邻。“Was heared from shore to shore”我们小组做了意译，从这岸这边传到另一边，就是传遍了湖岸。A lake like this is never smoother than at such a time; and the clear portion of the air above it being, shallow and darkened by clouds, the water, full of light and reflections, becomes a lower heaven itself so much the more important.这样的湖再也不会比此时此刻更加平滑了。清冽的空气（笼罩）在湖面上，（树木的）影子被乌云映照得更为暗淡，湖面上光影斑驳，这景色形成了一个人间仙境，使它越发值得珍视了。这段话，我们小组成员都是在作者的景色描写下，自动进行脑补翻译的，可能有过度引申的嫌疑。“shallow and darkened by clouds”这句话我们一直都翻不好，“shadow”不知道指的是倒映在水里的影子还是乌云的影子。希望大家多多指正。From a hill-top near by, where the wood had been recently cut off, there was a pleasing vista southward across the pond, through a wide indentation in the hills which form the shore there, where their opposite sides sloping toward each other suggested a stream flowing out in that direction through a wooded valley, but stream there was none.从附近的刚被砍伐完树木的山顶向下看，可以看到南边令人心旷神怡的美景。在山间横穿了一个广阔的凹陷状的池塘，这些小山远离湖岸，相斜而下，好似有一条小溪从高处飞流而下，穿越树木繁茂的山谷，但实际上并没有小溪。这句话的翻译很纠结，真应该是“一百个读者，一百幅景色。”其中，“there was a pleasing vista southward across the pond, through a wide indentation in the hills which form the shore there”最难翻译，我们小组首先确定这幅景色的方位是南边，然后根据作者的描写，我们认为应该是山谷底下有个池塘，然后再根据逐字逐句的进行翻译。That way I looked between and over the near green hills to some distant and higher ones in the horizon, tinged with blue. 我就是以那样的方式眺望靠近远处淡蓝色地平线上的青山。这句话中“between and over”我们小组没有明确翻译出来，实在尽力了。Indeed, by standing on tiptoe I could catch a glimpse of some of the peaks of the still bluer and more distant mountain ranges in the northwest, those true-blue coins from heavens own mint, and also of some portion of the village. 确实，踮起脚尖，我可以瞥见北边更蓝更远的山脉，这种真实的蓝色只有天空这座制造厂才可以创造出来，还可以看见村庄的其他一些部分。“those true-blue coins from heavens own mint”我们一开始始终不理解景色描写跟硬币有什么关系，而且作者想突出说明是怎样的蓝的话，为什么这段描写没有直接跟在“bluer”后面，后来查阅资料，才发现者应该是作者的比喻句。But in other directions, even from this point, I could not see over or beyond the woods which surrounded me. It is well to have some water in your neighborhood, to give buoyancy to and float the earth.但是换一个方向看，即使站在现在这个位置，我也不能看见这环绕着我的树木之外的景色。在附近，有一些水也是极好的，水有浮力，大地就能漂浮起来。我们认为这里的“fl