搞笑英文话剧剧本(三打白骨精).doc

搞笑英文话剧剧本ThreeTimesBeatingMonster 人物：T唐僧S：孙悟空E：猪八戒J：沙僧 B：白骨精B1：B变成的村姑B2：B变成的太婆 B3：B变化成的老头N：哪吒 T:Emitofo,doyouknowwherewearenow? S:Bajie,map! E:(摸出，递给S) S:Look,master(凑近T)（T、S一齐转向E） T:Bajie!HowManytimesIhavetoldyou,nottobringthesepicturesofbeautifulgirlswithyou! E:Oh,master!Forgiveme(伸手拿回) T:(缩手)Illkeepitforyouuntilwereachthewest E:But T:Emitofo,nothingislust,lustisnothing!Map? E:(递)Here.EmwehavearrivedinWhiteTigerMountain!AhIcantwalkonanymore!(坐)MystomachdoesntallowSo. S:FatPig! E:Monkey,ifyoudaretosaythesetwowordsonceagain,Iwill,Iwill. S:Youwillwhat(凶相)? E:(软禁)Iwillhelpyoucatchfleas(跳蚤). S:Hm! T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,IamabithungryCouldyougotogetmesomefood? E:Yousee,masterishungry,too! T:Baijie!Dontforgetwhoatemylastmeal! J:Butmaster,ifamonstercomeswhilebrothermonkegisaway. T:Em.Itisaproblem.Wukong,doyouhaveanyidea? S:Noproblem!(安装)（B已躲在一旁偷看） E:Thisis.? S:Electricnet!Ihavelearnttheenergyofelectricityfrommastersbooks.SoImadethis.Nomonstercanapproachyouifyoustayinit! T:EmWukong,youarebecomingmoreandmorescientific!Emitofo,knowledgeispower! S:Bye!(走) T:Letsplaycards!(三人开始打牌)音乐斗地主 B:Hm!Hm!Electricnet?Youaretoochildish.(变成B1) B1:(接近三人，望着)CanIjoinyou? T:Imsorry,lady.WeareplayingFightingAgainstLandlordandthreepeopleareenough. B1:(在一旁观看)Oh,Chance!Bomb! T:Bomb?(打出) B1:DoubleKing! T:Oh.Iwin!Em,Lady,youareamaster-hand.Comeinandteachme!(准备开电网门) S:(回来，看见B1)Oh,monster!(上前就打) B1:（倒)Ah T:(气愤)Wukong!Lookwhathavedone!Sheismyteacher! S:Sheisamonster! T:Nonsense!(深呼吸) S:Oh,pleasedont T:Itstoolate!(唱)Oncemoreyouopenthedoor(泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱) S:Please,Please,oh,no(痛苦抱头) T:(呛住，咳)Wukong,Imdisappointedwithyou! B:(真身出现)Hm!SunWukong,Illteachyoualesson!(变成太婆) B2:Hello,haveyouseenmydaughter? T:Daughter?.(连忙挡住地尸体)No,sorry!(陪笑，B2想看后面是什么，T挡) S:（咬牙切齿）Youmonster,Illbeatyouintohell!(S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2) E&J:AreyouOk,master?(扶T) J:Look,(伸食指)howmany? T:Two.(晕乎乎地)SunWukong,gameover!(变成B3) B3:(看到B1,B2尸体)Oh.,mydaughter,mywife!Whodidit?!(哭喊) S:Illkillyou,monster!(打) T:（想阻止，未及）You,you.(险些晕，E,J扶住)Youhavekilledthreelives! S:No,theyarenothumanbeings!Theyarecreatedbymonster! T:Monster?Youarearealmonster!Neverletmeseeyou,go! S:(悲，离去)（音乐，营造“假”悲伤气氛）人鬼情未了 E:Master,brotherMonkeyis. T:Scratch!Dontmentionthatguyanymore! B:(出现)Ha,ha,ha!(三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后“飘”走) T:（惊）Youare. B:Howfoolishyouare,MrTang!(E,J去阻斗，被击退) B:(抓住T)Illenjoyyourmeatandblood,ha,ha. S:(悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕)Athousandyearslater. T:Wukong? E:Oh,BrotherMonkey! J:Ourheroisback! T:I,Icantunderstand.Whathappened? S:Master,yourIQneedsincreasing!Thismonsterchangeditsappearanceintothreeshapesinordertocheatyou! T:How,howdidyoufindout? S:(沉默).Monkeysintuition(直觉) N:Excuseme,whereisthecniminal? S;Ah.youaretoolate,Nezha!(对T)Ivecalledthepolice. N:(摇醒B)Youareunderarrest.(出示证件)YouhavetherighttoremainsilentIfyougiveuptheright,anythingyouwill saycanandwillbeagainstyouinacourtoflaw!(带走B) T:Wukong(S不理T)Iadmitmymistakethistime(S仍不理)Imsorry(小声) S:What? T:Imsorry. S:Em?Louder,please? T:I.am.sorry.(S捂耳)（音乐响）敢问路在何方（这个放伴奏） T:Letsgoguys!(歌) S:Youarecarryingtheluggage,Iamleadingthehorse. E:Saygoodbyetothesun,Welcomeeveningglow. J:Sleepingontheground,againwesetoutsetout,againwesetout. T.S.E.J:Ah.Ah.Sleepingonthegroundagainwesetout. T: