在面对生活中的失意时你需要记住的事.docx

在面对生活中的失意时你需要记住的事What You Need to Remember to Deal With Loss in LifeUnfortunately, we all deal with loss in life. No matter what form or severity, coping is rarely easy. The lack of healthy coping measures can exacerbate the pain, especially when the loss is as drastic as a loved one dying.不幸的是,我们都要应对生活中的失意。无论什么形式或严重程度,应对起来都是不简单的。不健康的应对措施可能会加剧疼痛,尤其是当你的损失是和一个你爱的人死去一样悲痛时。Youll never completely get over your loss. Instead, youll adapt, learn, and become a stronger you.你永远不会完全克服你的失意。相反,你会适应,学习,成为一个更强的你。It is difficult to relate to any kind of pain. Even if there are similarities between occurrences, everyone deals with pain differently.它很难与任何一种疼痛联系在一起。即使事件之间有相似之处,每个人处理疼痛的方式也会不同。Thats okay. Theres no “correct” or “appropriate” timetable towards healing. Everyones will be different. Friends and family may encourage you to “get over it” by occupying your mind and staying busy. While healthy distraction is positive (as Ill elaborate on in a bit), theres no need to rush how you think you should feel. Your feelings are meant to be felt as they occur in the moment and no one else knows them better than you. Cry if you want to. Scream if you want to. Flail your arms madly in the air if you want to.没关系。对治疗的时间表来说没有“正确”或“适当”的。每个人的将是不同的。朋友和家人可能会鼓励你通过占据你的大脑和保持忙碌来“克服”。但是健康是积极的(我会详细说明一点),没有必要逼迫你认为你应该感觉怎样。你的感觉是发生在当下,没有人比你更了解他们。如果你想哭就哭。如果你想要尖叫就尖叫。如果你想在空中疯狂打你的手臂也行。Its okay to not want to talk about it.不想谈论它没关系。Again, everyone handles pain in a different way. Many experience a “roller coaster” effect of feelings, where your emotions vary from day to day, or even minute to minute. One moment could feel like the healing process is working, the next could feel like a deeper regression into sadness. There will be days that you feel like going out and about with friends and days where you wont feel like emerging from the pillow fortress in your bedroom. These varying emotions are also okay, but listen to them attentively. Theres no need to pressure yourself into coping in a way you think is “proper” because “everyone else does it that way”.再说一次,每个人都以不同的方式处理疼痛。许多经历了“过山车”影响情绪的人,每天你的情绪都会变化,甚至每分钟。有一刻会觉得愈合过程正在进行,下一刻可能觉得回归到深刻的悲伤中。有些天你喜欢出去和朋友在一起，有些天你不喜欢走出卧室的枕头堡垒。这些不同的情绪也是好的,但认真地听取他们的意见。没有必要给自己施加压力去应对你认为是“适当的”思维方式,因为“其他人也那样做”。Be kind to your body.善待自己的身体。When cloaked in a veil of darkness its easy to forget about personal hygiene and appropriate eating habits. Neglecting showering, eating, activity, and regular sleeping habits is detrimental on all fronts to your health and well being.当隐匿在黑暗的面纱里很容易忘记个人卫生和适当的饮食习惯。忽视了洗澡,吃饭,活动,和有规律的睡眠习惯在所有方面对你的健康和福祉是有害的。Activity of any kind takes your mind off the negative, so its especially smart to任何形式的活动把你的注意力从消极中带出来,所以它是特别好的Do the things you love most.做你最喜欢的事情。Theres no easier and mentally healthier way to remind yourself that good things still exist than doing things you truly love. It doesnt matter what it is, staying active towards your dreams and immersed in your deepest desires will do wonders when dealing with loss. Wouldnt your lost loved one still want you to keep doing the things that make you happiest?没有更容易和更健康的方式去提醒自己,好事情比你真的喜欢做的事情更多的存在。不管它是什么,保持活跃的思想朝着自己的梦想前进,沉浸在你最深的愿望里将在处理损失时创造奇迹。当你失去所爱的人时你仍然会一直做让你快乐的事情吗?But if you suddenly lose interest in a passion, why not但是如果你突然失去兴趣激情,为什么不Explore something new.探索新事物。Travel. Cook. Try a new hobby. Take some time off “work” to work on yourself. Even if its just exploring a new neighborhood or trying a new food, incorporating new stimuli to your environment will keep things fresh and remind you that there is a lot of life to still experience. My grandma (may she rest in peace) always used to tell me, “Life is for the living.” Some of the most substantial breakthrough moments exist slightly outside of your comfort zone.旅行。烹饪。尝试一种新的爱好。花一些时间在你自己身上。即使只是探索新邻居或尝试一种新的食物,你的环境中的新刺激将保持新鲜感并提醒你生活中仍然有很多经验。我的奶奶(愿她安息)总是告诉我,“活着就是为了生活。”一些最重大的突破时刻存在你的舒适区之外。Dont mask your pain in external variables, particularly substances.不要用外部变量掩盖你的痛苦,尤其是物质。Theres an idiotic association in our culture of sadness and substance abuse. In film, television, and other mass medias, we see characters whore experiencing death or heartbreak drinking heavily in some dank bar alone or getting wasted on heroin in a back alley. This has effectively desensitized us to the real life threat of alcoholism that can be kick started by a tragic life experience. Many people mask their pain in drugs or alcohol, but it never works. It has literally a zero chance of successfully helping you cope. Your problems are still very real when the high wears off, and the high always fades. Dont prolong your grieving process. You deserve more.在我们的文化中有一个愚蠢的想法那就是悲伤和药物滥用。在电影、电视等其他大众媒体里，,我们看到人物正在经历死亡或心碎或在一些潮湿的酒吧酗酒或浪费在弄堂里的海洛因。这实际上已经麻木了我们的现实生活威胁酗酒可以被悲惨的生活经历踢出去。许多人用毒品或酒精掩盖他们的痛苦,但它不起作用。它几乎不能帮助你应付。当它消退时,永远消失时，你的问题仍非常现实。不要延长你的悲伤的过程。你应该得到更多Youre a richer person because of them.因为他们，你是一个富有的人。Instead of dwelling on memories of yesteryear, be thankful in reminiscence that you had them in your life. Cherish the memories instead of refusing to let go of them. Celebrate their life by continuing their legacy and making them proud. Do good by them by celebrating their life more, opposed to constantly mourning their death. Its good to be thankful for the time and memories you shared together.和停留在过去的记忆相比我们应该感恩在回忆里有他们在你的生活中。珍惜的记忆,而不是拒绝放手。庆祝他们的生活,延续他们的遗产,让他们感到骄傲。通过他们庆祝他们的生活做好事,不要不断哀悼他们的死亡。感谢和你们一起共享的时间和记忆是很好的。The end of anything is a new beginning.结束是一个新的开始。Stories