爱情是谬论 翻译.doc

于竹影 20094008 英语092 Love is fallacy 爱情是谬论Cool was I and logical. Keen, calculating, perspicacious, acute - I was all of these. My brain was as powerful as a dynamo, as a chemists scales, as penetrating as a scalpel. And - think of it! - I was only eighteen. 我很酷还很有逻辑，并且聪明机警，头脑敏捷。我的头脑就像发动机一样充满能量，像药剂师的秤一样准确，像手术刀一样锋利。你们想想，我才18岁呢。It is not often that one so young has such a giant intellect. Take, for example, Petey Burch my roommate at the University of Minnesota. Same age, same background, but dumb as an ox. A nice enough fellow, you understand, but nothing upstairs. Emotional type. Unstable. Impressionable. Worst of all, a faddist. Fads, I submit, are the very negation of reason. To be swept up in every new craze that comes along, to surrender oneself to idiocy just because everybody else is doing it - this to me, is the acme of mindlessness. Not, however, to Petey. 像我这样年轻的人就拥有这么大的智慧不是每个人都有的。就拿我再明尼苏达大学的室友佩蒂. 贝琦来说吧，他跟我一样大，一样的背景，可他蠢得像头牛。你可能会觉得他是个好同伴，但是他没什么头脑，只是个感情用事的家伙，即没立场又冲动。最可悲的是，他居然天天追求潮流。我认为所谓的潮流毫无理智可言。让自己随波逐流，把自己埋头于的这个白痴的潮流，而仅仅是因为每个人都这样做。在我看来，这实在是愚蠢到了极致。这对佩蒂来说却不是如此。One afternoon I found Petey lying on his bed with an expression of such distress on his face that I immediately diagnosed appendicitis. Dont move, I said, Dont take a laxative. Ill get a doctor.某天下午，我发现佩蒂忧郁地躺在床上，我便随即诊断他是得了阑尾炎。“别乱动，”我说，“别吃泻药，我马上请医生来”Raccoon, he mumbled thickly.“浣熊”他沙哑地说道。Raccoon? I said, pausing in my flight.“浣熊？”我说，顿了顿我飞快的脚步。I want a raccoon coat, he wailed.“我想要一件浣熊大衣，”他哀叹着。I perceived that his trouble was not physical but mental. Why do you want a raccoon coat?我猜想他的问题应该不是身体上的而是心理上的。“为什么你想要浣熊大衣？”I should have known it, he cried, pounding hie temples.“我早就该知道，”他嚷嚷着，抑制着自己的情绪。I should have known it theyd come back when the Charleston came back. Like a fool I spent all my money for textbook, and now I cant get a raccoon coat. “我早就该想到在查尔斯顿舞流行起来后，浣熊大衣会再次红起来，可是我居然傻得把所有的钱用来买书，所以现在我没钱买浣熊大衣了。”Can you mean, I said incredulously, that people are actually wearing raccoon coats again?“你是不是说人们又开始穿浣熊大衣了？”All the Big Men on Campus are wearing them. Whereve you been? “所有的校园名人都在穿啊，之前你去哪儿了？”In the library, I said, naming a place not frequented by Big Men on Campus.“图书馆，”我说，我说的这个地方对那些校园名人来说都很陌生。He leaped from the bed and paced the room. Ive got to have a raccoon coat, he said passionately. Ive got to!他从床上起来，在房间里来回踱着脚步。“我必须得得到一件浣熊大衣，”他激情澎湃地说道，“我一定要得到。”Petey, why? Look at it rationally. Raccoon coats are unsanitary. They shed. They smell bad. They weigh too much. Theyre unsightly. They.“佩蒂，为什么？理智一点，浣熊大衣很不卫生，会掉毛，味道难闻，又重又难看，还.”You dont understand, he interrupted, impatiently. Its the thing to do. Dont you want to be in the swim?“你不懂，”他很不耐烦地打断了我的话。“这是潮流，难道你不想赶潮流吗？”No, I said truthfully Well, I do, he declared. Id give anything for a raccoon coat. Anything!“不想，”我认真地说道。“好吧，但是我想，”他大声说道。“我愿意付出一切来换一件浣熊大衣，一切都可以。”My brain, that precision instrument, slipped into high gear. Anything? I asked, looking at him narrowly.我的脑袋此时就像一件精密的一起开始加速运行。“一切吗？”我问道，严肃地看着他。Anything, he affirmed in ringing tones.“一切都行”他斩钉截铁地说道。I stroked my chin thoughtfully. It so happened that I knew where to get my hands on a raccoon coat. My father had had one in his undergraduate days; it lay now in a trunk in the attic back home. It also happened that Petey had something I wanted. He didnt have it exactly, but at least he had first rights on it. I refer to his girl, Polly Espy.我若有所思地摸着下巴。我知道了该怎么得到一件浣熊大衣。我父亲在读研的时候就有一件，现在放在我家储藏室里。刚好佩蒂也有我想要的东西，也不能说他有，他只是有优先权。我指的是他女朋友，波利. 艾斯比。I had long coveted Polly Espy. Let me emphasize that my desire for this young woman was not emotional in nature. She was, to be sure, a girl who excited the emotions, but I was not one to let my heart rule my head. I wanted Polly For a shrewdly calculated, entirely cerebral reason.我爱慕波利.艾斯比已久。我要强调一下，我对这个女人的爱慕可不是一时冲动。她虽然是个能让人冲动的女孩，可我不会因冲动而昏了头脑。我是经过深思熟虑，经过理智的头脑分析，才决定想要波利的。I was a freshman in law school. In a few years I would be out in practice. I was well aware of the importance of the right kind of wife in furthering a lawyers career. The successful lawyers I had observed were, almost without exception, married to beautiful, gracious, intelligent women. With one omission, Polly fitted these specifications perfectly.我是法律系的大一新生。今年之后我就会出去出去实习。我深知一位合适的妻子对律师前途的重要性。我发现，每个成功的律师后面都有一位漂亮，高尚，聪明的妻子。波利很符合这些特点，除了一点。Beautiful she was. She was not yet of pin-up proportions, but I felt that time would supply the lack. She already had the makings.她很漂亮。她虽不是可以当画挂起来的那种美女，但是我相信时间会弥补这个空缺的，因为她已经有了这个潜质。Gracious she was. By gracious I mean full of graces. She had an erectness of carriage, an ease of bearing, a poise that clearly indicated the best of breeding. At table her manners were exquisite. I had seen her at the Kozy Kampus Korner eating the specialty of the house - a sandwich that contained scraps of pot roast, gravy, chopped nuts, and a dipper of sauerkraut - without even getting her fingers moist.她很高尚，我指的是她很优雅。她亭亭玉立，大方得体，从她优雅的姿态便可知她所受到的是最好的教养。在餐桌上的的举止也很得体。我曾在温馨之家看她吃那儿的特产一种夹着肉沫肉汁和碎坚果的三明治，还有一碟泡菜，她甚至都没有弄脏手指。Intelligent she was not. In fact, she veered in the opposite direction. But I believed that under my guidance she would smarten up. At any rate, it was worth a try. It is, after all, easier to make a beautiful dumb girl smart than to make an ugly smart girl beautiful.她就是不聪明。实际上，她却与聪明背道而驰了。但是我相信在我的指导下她会聪明起来。无论成功的概率是多少，我都要一试。毕竟要让漂亮女人便聪明容易，让丑陋女人变漂亮难啊。Petey, I said, are you in love with Polly Espy?“贝蒂，”我说，“你是不是在跟波利.贝蒂”谈恋爱？I think shes a keen kid, he replied, but I dont know if you call it love. Why?“我只觉得她是个聪明的孩子，”他回答道，“但我不知道这能否叫恋爱，为什么这么问？”Do you, I asked, have any kind of formal arrangement with her? I mean are you going steady or anything like that?“你到底是不是嘛，”我问道，“你到底有没有跟她正式交往？我是说你有没有跟她约会，或别的跟这性质一样的事情？”No. We see each other quite a bit, but we both have other dates. Why?“没有，我们经常见面，但我们都有约会对象。为什么这么问？”Is there, I asked, any other man for whom she has a particular fondness?我问道“她有没有特别喜欢的人？”Not that I know of. Why?“至少我没听说过吧，为什么这么问？”I nodded with satisfaction. In other words, if you were out of the picture, the field would be open. Is that right?我满意地点点头。“也就是说，如果你不在，场地就是空的咯？”I guess so. What are you getting at?“我想是吧。你到底想问什么？”Nothing , nothing, I said innocently, and took my suitcase out the closet.“没什么，没什么。”我若无其事地说，一边从柜子里拿出衣服。Where are you going? asked Petey.“你要去哪儿？”贝蒂问。Home for weekend. I threw a few things into the bag.“回家过周末啊。”我把一些东西塞进包里。Listen, he said, clutching my arm eagerly, while youre home, you couldnt get some money from your old man, could you , and lend it to me so I can buy a raccoon coat? “听着，”他说，一边急切地拽着我的胳膊，“你回家后，你能不能向你爸那里拿点钱借我买浣熊大衣？”I may do better than that, I said with a mysterious wink and closed my bag and left.“我能做的比这还好呢，”我边说边向他神秘地眨了眨眼睛，合上包，便走了。Look, I said to Petey when I got back Monday morning. I threw open the suitcase and revealed the huge, hairy, gamy object that my father had worn in his Stutz Bearcat in 1925.“看看，”星期一早上回来我就对贝蒂说，我把衣服拿出，并打开我父亲1925年在斯图兹比尔卡特里穿的浣熊大衣，它很大，多毛，气味重。Holy Toledo! said Petey reverently. He plunged his hands into the raccoon coat and then his face. Holy Toledo! he repeated fifteen or twenty times.“我的天啊！”贝蒂一脸崇拜的说道。他用手抚摸着这件浣熊大衣，饭后把脸靠在上面。“天啊！”他重复了十五次或二十次了。Would you like it? I asked.“喜欢吗？”我问。Oh yes! he cried, clutching the greasy pelt to him. Then a canny look came into his eyes. What do you want for it?“哦，是啊，”他叫道，紧紧抓着这件衣服。然后眼里出现了意思狡猾的神气。“你想要我拿什么来换？”Your girl I said, mincing no words.“你女朋友”我说，毫不隐晦。Polly? he said in a horrified whisper. You want Polly?“波利？”他惊奇的说道。Thats right.“对的。”He shook his head.他摇摇头。I shrugged. Okay. If you dont want to be in the swim, I guess its your business.我耸了耸肩。“好吧，如果你不想赶潮流，我想着是你自己的事情。”I sat down in a chair and pretended to read a book, but out of the corner of my eye I kept watching Petey. He was a torn man. First he looked at the coat with the expression of waif at a bakery window. Then he turned away and set his jaw resolutely. Then he looked back at the coat, with even more longing in his face. Then he turned away, but with not so much resolution this time. Back and forth his head swiveled, desire waxing, resolution waning. Finally he didnt turn away at all; he just stood and stared with mad lust at the coat.我坐到椅子上，假装在看书。但其实我正写着眼观察贝蒂。他已经被折磨得不行了。一开始他看起来就像一个乞丐看着窗户里的烤面包的表情一样。然后他转开头，但是决心没有这么坚决了。他的头来来回回地旋转着，决心逐渐减弱了他干脆直接贪婪地盯着浣熊大衣，头不再转开了。It isnt as though I was in love with Polly, he said thickly. Or going steady or anything like that. 我没有爱上波利，也没有跟她交往，或其他的暧昧关系。Thats right, I murmured. “太好了，”我低声说道。Whats Polly to me, or me to Polly? “波利对我来说是什么？我对波利而言又是什么呢？”Not a thing, said I. “什么都不是，”我说。Its just been a casual kick - just a few laughs, thats all. “只是一个随便的儿戏，就这样。”Try on the coat, said I. “试试衣服。”我说。He compiled. The coat bunched high over his ears and dropped all the way down to his shoe tops. He looked like a mound of dead raccoons. Fits fine, he said happily. 他照做了。这件大衣穿在他身上从耳朵一直到脚上。他看起来就像一只死浣熊。“很合适，”他很高兴地说。I rose from my chair. Is it a deal? I asked, extending my hand. He swallowed. Its a deal, he said and shook my hand. 我站起来。“就这样说定了？”我问他，并伸出我的手。他咽了咽。“说定了，”说着并跟我握手。I had my first date with Polly the following evening. This was in the nature of a survey. I wanted to find out just how much work I had to get her mind up to the standard I required. I took her first to dinner.第二天晚上我便开始和波利的第一次约会。这是一次试探，我想知道让她脑袋聪明到我想要的程度有多难。我先带她去吃了顿晚饭。Gee, that was a delish dinner, she said as we left the restaurant. “好家伙，晚餐很美味，”在我们要离开饭店的时候她说道。And then I took her home. Gee, I had a sensaysh time, she said as she bade me good night. 让后我送她回家。“好家伙，我刚度过了一个令人愉快的时光，”在我们分别的时候她说。I went back to my room with a heavy heart. I had gravely underestimated the size of my task. This girls lack of information was terrifying. Nor would it be enough merely to supply her with information. First she had to be taught to think. This loomed as a project of no small dimensions, and at first I was tempted to give her back to Petey. 我心事沉沉地回到房间，我之前真是太低估这件工程的艰难性了。这个女孩脑袋里完全没货，你再给她灌输也没用。首先必须要教她怎么“思考”。这个工程已呈现出其不可实施性，第一次我产生一种想把她还给佩蒂的想法。But then I got to thinking about her abundant physical charms and about the way she entered a room and the way she handled a knife and fork, and I decided to make an effort. 但后来我又想到了她丰满的身材，她进入房间时走路的姿态，她就餐时的优雅，于是我决定努力一试。I went about it, as in all things, systematically. I gave her a course in logic. It happened that I, as a law student, was taking a course in logic myself, so I had all the facts at my fingertips. Polly,: I said in to Her when I picked her up on our next date, tonight we are going over to the Knoll and talk. 我将所有计划一一系统地实施，我先教她逻辑学。因为在我学法学的时候，我自学了逻辑学，所以我对此了如指掌。“波利，第”二次约会时我对她说“今晚我们去小山谈谈”。Oo, terrif, she replied. One thing I will say for this girl: you would go far to find another so agreeable. “哇，太好了，”她回答道。我只想对这个女孩说：你还有很长一段落要走，到那天你真觉得好。We went to the Knoll, the campus trysting place, and we sat down under an old oak, and she looked at me expectantly. What are we going to talk about? she asked. 我们去了小山，这是学校幽会的地方。我们在一颗老橡树下坐下，她满眼期待地看着我，并问道，“接下来我们谈点什么呢？”Logic. “逻辑学。”She thought this over for a minute and decided she liked it. Magnif, she said. 她想了想，感觉自己会喜欢，说道，“太好了。”Logic, I said, clearing my throat, is the science of thinking. Before we can think correctly, we must first learn to recognize the common fallacies of logic. These we will take up tonight. “逻辑，”我说，清了清嗓子，“就是思考的学问。在我们正确思考之前，我们必须首先学会辨别一些常犯得逻辑谬误。”Wow-dow! she cried, clapping her hands delightedly. “哇哦！”她尖叫起来，非常兴奋地鼓掌。I winced, but went bravely on. First let us examine the fallacy called Dicto Simpliciter. 我有点畏缩了，但还是勇敢的继续下去。“我们首先要学的谬误叫着绝对判断。”By all means, she urged, batting her lashes eagerly. “必须的，”她催促我，眨着眼睛。Dicto Simpliciter means an argument based on an unqualified generalization. For example: Exercise is good. Therefore everybody should exercise. “绝对判断就是一个建立在不合格的概括上的论点。比如说锻炼很好，所以每个人都应该锻炼。”Polly, I said gently, the argument is a fallacy. Exercise is good is an unqualified generalization. For instance, if you have heart disease, exercise is bad, not good. Therefore exercise is bad, not good. Many people are ordered by their doctors not to exercise. You must qualify the generalization. You must say exercise is usually good, or exercise is good for most people. Otherwise you have committed a Dicto Simpliciter. Do you see? “波利，”我温柔地说，“这个论点是错误的，锻炼很好这个论点的概括不合格，比如说，如果你有心脏病，那么锻炼就不合适，不好，所以锻炼对有心脏病的人就有害，不好。医生会建议很多人不宜锻炼。你必须使你的概况合理化。你应该说，锻炼一般来说是好的，或者说锻炼对大部分人来说是好的。否则你就犯了绝对判断的错误，懂了吗？”No, she confessed. But this is marvy. Do more! Do more! “不懂，”她承认，“但这个很有趣，再讲下去，讲下去！”It will be better if you stop tugging at my sleeve, I told her, and when she desisted, I continued. Next we take up a fallacy called Hasty Generalization. Listen carefully: You cant speak French. Petey Burch cant speak French. I must therefore conclude that nobody at the University of Minnesota can speak French. “你要是不扯我袖子该多好，”我对她说，她停止后，我继续讲，“接下来我们讲草率结论的谬误。认真听：你不会说法语，佩蒂不会说法语，所以我下结论，我们学校没有人会说法语。”Really? said Polly, amazed. Nobody? “真的吗？”波利很惊讶地说，“没有人？”I hid my exasperation. Polly, its a fallacy. The generalization is reached too hastily. There are too few instance to support such a conclusion. 我抑制住自己的火爆脾气。“波利，这是个谬误，这个结论下得太草率了，几乎没有例子能证明这个结论。”Know any more fallacies? she asked breathlessly. This is more fun than dancing, even. “还知道更多谬误吗？”她上气不接下气地问道，“这甚至比跳舞还要好玩。”I fought off a wave of despair. I was getting no where with this girl, absolutely no where. Still, I am nothing, if not persistent. I continued. Next comes Post Hoc. Listen to this: Lets not take Bill on our picnic. Every time we take it out with us, it rains. 我控制自己的绝望，我拿这个女孩没办法了，真没办法了。但是如果不坚持，我就一事无成。于是我继续，“接下来是因果颠倒。听着：我们不要带比尔去野炊，因为每次带他去都会下雨。”I know somebody just like that, she exclaimed. A girl back home - Eula Becker, her name is. It never fails. Every single time we take her on a picnic. “我就认识这样的人，”她说道。“一个我家乡的女孩-叫做乌拉. 贝克，没有一次不是那样，每次我们带她一起去野炊.”Polly, I said sharply, its a fallacy. Eula Becker doesnt cause the rain. She has no connection with the rain. You are guilty of Post Hoc if you blame Eula Becker. “波利，”我用尖尖的声音说，“这是个谬误，乌拉. 贝克不是下雨的原因。她与下雨没有联系。要是你责怪乌拉. 贝克你就犯了因果颠倒的谬误。”Ill never do it again, she promised contritely. Are you mad at me? “我以后不会了，”她很认真地承诺。“你对我很生气吗？”I sighed deeply. No, Polly, Im not mad. 我深深地叹了口气，“没，波利，我不生气。”Then tell me some more fallacies. “那就再给我讲几个谬误。”All right. Lets try Contradictory Premises. “好吧，那我们讲矛盾前提。”Yes, lets, she chirped, blinking her eyes happily. “嗯，讲吧，”她像小鸟一样，愉快地眨着眼睛。I frowned, but plunged ahead. Heres an example of Contradictory Premises: If God can do anything, can He make a stone so heavy that He wont be able to lift it? 我皱了眉，但还是继续。“这是个矛盾前提的例子：如果上帝是万能的，他能造出他搬不动的石头吗？”Of course, she replied promptly. “当然，”她立即回答道。But if He can do anything, He can lift the stone, I pointed out. “但是如果他是万能的，他就搬得起这个石头。”我说。Yeah, she said thoughtfully. Well, then I guess He cant make the stone. “是啊，”他若有所思地说道，“那我猜他应该造不出这样的石头。”But He can do anything, I reminded her. “但他是万能的，”我提醒她。She scratched her pretty, empty head. Im all confused, she admitted.她抓了抓她漂亮却空无一物的脑袋。“我完全糊涂了，”她承认道。Of course you are. Because when the premises of an argument contradict each other, there can be no argument. If there is an irresistible force, there can be no immovable object. If there is an immovable object, there can be no irresistible force. Get it? “你当然糊涂了。因为在论点的前提都相互矛盾的情况下，论点就不存在。如果有一种无法抵制的力量，就没有搬不动的物体。如果有搬不动的物体，就没有无法地址的力量。懂了吗？”Tell me more of this keen stuff, she said eagerly. “再跟我讲讲这么有智慧的东西，”她很渴望地说。I consulted my watch. I think wed better call it a night. Ill take you home now, and you go over all the things youve learned. Well have another session tomorrow night. 我看了看表，“我看今天就到此为止，我现在送你回家，你复习下刚学过的东西。我们明晚上另一课。”I deposited her at the girls dormitory, where she assured me that she had had a perfectly evening, and I went glumly home to my room. Petey lay snoring in his bed, the raccoon coat huddled like a great hairy beast at his feet. For a moment I considered waking him and telling him that he could have his girl back. It seemed clear that my project was doomed to failure. The girl simply had a logic-proof head. 我送她到女生寝室，在那门口她告诉我她今天过得很愉快。但我郁闷地回到我的房间。佩蒂正在床上打鼾，浣熊大衣堆在他腿上就像一头多毛的熊。那一刻我想跟他散散步然后跟他说他可以要回波利了。我的整个计划似乎注定要失败，这女孩简直完全没有逻辑可言。But then I reconsidered. I had wasted one evening; I might as well waste another. Who knew? Maybe somewhere in the extinct crater of her mind, a few members still smoldered. Maybe somehow I could fan them into flame. Admittedly it was not a prospect fraught with hope, but I decided to give it one more try. 但接着我又想，我既然已经浪费了一个晚上，我还是再浪费一个晚上好了。谁知道呢？可能在她脑袋潜在的某个地方还有些火焰在燃烧的呢。可能需要我把它们扇成大火焰。我承认这不是个有希望的想法，但我还是决定再试试。Seated under the oak the next evening I said, Our first fallacy tonight is called Ad Misericordiam. 第二晚我坐在橡树下说，“今晚第一个谬误叫做文不对题。”She quivered with delight.她快乐地点点头。Listen closely, I said. A man applies for a job. When the boss asks him what his qualifications are, he has a wife and six children at home, the wife is a helpless cripple, the children have nothing to eat, no clothes to wear, no shoes on their feet, there are no beds in the house, no coal in the cellar, and winter is coming. “认真听，”我说，“一男人要应聘岗位，老板问他有什么证书，他说他有个老婆六个孩子在家，老婆是个没有希望了的残疾人，孩子们食不果腹，衣不遮体，没鞋穿，没床睡，炉子里没碳烧，可是冬天就要来了。”A tear rolled down each of Pollys pink cheeks. Oh, this is awful, awful, she sobbed. 波利纷纷的脸上掉下一串泪珠。“哦，这太遭了，糟糕。”她抽泣着说道。Yes, its awful, I agreed, but its no argument. The man never answered the bosss question about his qualifications. Instead he appealed to the bosss sympathy. He committe