如何知道你一生中想做什么.doc

如何知道你一生中想做什么 Celes,你好，我不知道我想做什么。我希望自己能集中精力做一件事，并且所有的事情都能做到最好，我想这是获得成功的唯一方式。问题是各种各样的决定搞得我团团转。我很羡慕那些能在早期就知道自己是怎样的人，该做什么的人。请帮我。M “弄清楚该做什么”是我的读者和客户问得最普遍的问题之一。就像我的一些客户，他们觉得自己进入该弄清自己要做什么的阶段了。因些，不知道该做什么使得他们感觉很受挫。他们觉得如果能够很快发现该做什么，那么就能很快着手做，就不会浪费时间在不相干的事情上了。 情况是这样子的。要想知道自己想做什么，首先要基于相关点。这些相关点是根据你过去的经历所决定的。如果你没积累一定的经历，你就不可能得到满意的答案。 比方说你想去买手机，但是你从来没有用过手机。你不知道手机长什么样，都有什么功能。很多牌子陈列在那里，但是样式都不同。 怎么办？ 你会：1.坐在家里仔细考虑你该买什么手机，或是等待答案偶尔也会冒出一些想法。这样做也许会有用，也许永远也没办法。不管怎样，你都不会计划去做任何事情，直到答案出现为止。2.想办法知道手机是什么。走出去探索不同手机的用途。如果可能，你也可以试用一下，比如用你朋友的或是到手机店里去。 哪种选择会对你走出困境有所帮助呢？哪种选择带给你新视野，新信息，甚至是对你的决定有指引呢？哪种选择能更有效地知道你该做什么呢？ 如果你选第二种方式，我们的想法一致。 你明白我从中得知什么吗？你的迷茫 你想知道该做什么就必须做一些相关的实验。现在，如果你没有走出这一步去获得一系列的线索，你脑子里就不会有许多相关的事情，你就会觉得很迷茫。之所以会迷茫是因为你没能够冒险尝试脱离现在的形势。 这就好像你在你的一生中从未做过运动而却问你最喜欢的运动是什么，或者说你在一年内都读不完一本书却问你最喜欢的书是什么，或者你根本就没去餐馆吃过饭，却问你最喜欢哪间餐馆道理是一样的。只要你不确定，还在犹豫，困惑，无从行动，这层迷雾就依然存在。 要想理清头绪，你需要探索，需要走出去，尝试做不同的事情来获取经验，学会新知识并开始进入新的形势。增进尽可能多的经历后，你的头脑里就会产生基本的参考点。经历越多，知识越丰富，就会越清楚自己喜欢什么，不喜欢什么；就能更好地发现哪些是你真的想做的而哪些是你不想做的。我是如何发现什么是我一生中确实想做的 2006年，一件关键的事让我发现了我的人生目标。在这之前，我对我的目标和兴趣总是全力以赴。但我并不完全清楚我的一生想做什么。我所知道（作为一个小孩）的就是尽我最大的努力成为一个对社会有价值的人，这就意味着我已经做到最好，挖掘了我的最高潜力。 我那时也是那么做。我全力以赴追求我的目标。 对我所做的每件事都全身心投入。不管我的目标是什么，从追求成就，到研究学术，再到经商（最后一次是做图表设计的，在中学的时候学制作网站），我都会把注意力集中在最高奖项上，并尽最大努力实现。无论我的兴趣是什么，从制作电脑壁纸到笔记本贴膜，网页/图表设计，服装设计再到游戏设计，我继续热心地从事着，从不犹豫。 在设定目标、制定策略、计划、行动和回顾成果并重新调整我的计划最后实现目标的这一整个过程让我大开眼界。旅程的每一步都让我学到关于世界，也关于自己的一些新东西。我在这个过程成长，变得更自觉。也更了解自己的长处，盲点，价值以及喜欢什么不喜欢什么。我意识到我原本觉得对我很重要的东西事实上不是我想要的。我得到我以前所没有的。 如果我没有热忱地关注我的成长，追求我的目标和兴趣，我不会意识到这些。随着我注入到我的追求中的能量，使我溶入到不同的环境和经历中，到最后知道我想做什么就只是时间问题了。 因此，知道你想做什么的关键就是要走出去，获得尽可能多的经验包括广度和深度两方面。1.经验的广度涉及到你做的各种各样的事。如果你只学工程学，在你一生中只从事工程师的工作，那就是到了该学习工程以外的新知识的时候了。可以是任何事情跳舞、画画等。你尝试的东西越多，建立的经验广度就越宽。2.经验的深度涉及到的是你所做的事情有多强烈。如果你只是用守旧的态度来对待工程学，并且只是做一些必须的事情来迎合主题，而不是利用额外的时间来更好地学习，你就只能是一般的水平。然而如果你很强烈想成为一个顶级的工程师，研读顶级工程师，挑战所有新出现的工程，并且阅读最好的工程学教程，相比之下，你的深度就会好得多。经验的深度跟你所花的时间成正比，并且当你在做事的时候可以集中你的注意力和能量。从哪里开始？ 因为有很多种不同的可能，所以在这点上你肯定想知道首先从哪里开始。我的建议是从你已经感兴趣的事情着手。（是否有进一步的兴趣尝试或追求）。这里有5个步骤寻找你想做的。1.拿出一张纸和一支笔。在30分钟内列出所有你想做但还没做的事。不要思考。不要考虑其可行性，也不要考虑你要如何去做。做这一步主要是知道有什么可做而不是要如何做。只要写出来就可以了。2.写完后，看一下清单，圈出你今天想做的。也许没有，也许有一些或更多。3.排序。在你想先做的事情前面标注1.下一步想做的事情前面标2，依此类推，直到你圈出最后一个为止。4.如何做。如何开始尝试你标注的第一件事？有些人可能很怕尝试新东西。那是因为你把事情过分复杂化了。你不需要辞去工作，停止学习，或者斥责你现在所做的。你可以继续你现在所做的并尝试一些新的东西。参加课程，自愿加入相关组织。咨询在这方面有经验的人。5.当你在经验的广度和深度上获得足够的积累后，关于想做什么，不想做什么，你的思路就很清晰了。关键的一步：采取行动 最后，开始行动获取新的经验。去尝试你想做的任何事情。通过自省和核对是否在正确的轨迹上来进行周期性的部署。当你的经验（包括广度和深度的）达到临界值的时候，答案就会明朗了。 其中最重要的是要最大限度地发挥你的每个经历。使自己完全沉浸在每个时刻中，不要忘了充分享受每一步。你想知道你的一生该做什么是因为你想充分地活出你自己。因此，如果错过试图找出你想做什么这个过程是可悲的。但如果你找到答案却没有顺势而为同样是没有作为的。沉浸于你现在的生活中，感激你经历过的每件事，不管是好的还是坏的，令人兴奋的还是令人失望的。那是你真正享受生活的时候。How To Know What You Want To Do In LifeHi Celes, I have no idea what I want to do. I wish I am strong enough to concentrate on one single thing and do everything to be the best at it. I believe it is the only way of attaining something. My problem is that the variety of decisions make my head spin. I envy those who from their early days know what theyll be and what theyll do. Please help. MGetting clarity on what to do is one of the most common questions I get from readers and clients alike. For some of my clients, they feel they are entering a period of their life where they should have clarity in what they want to do. Hence, not knowing what they want to do makes them feel frustrated. They feel that if they can quickly discover what they want to do, they can get started on it right away, rather than waste time doing seemingly unrelated things.Heres the thing though. To get an idea of what you want to do, you have to first base it off a reference point. This reference point is based on your past experiences. If you have not accumulated a set amount of experiences, you cant possibly generate a meaningful answer in that regard.For example, lets say you want to buy a mobile phone. However, you have never used a mobile phone in your life. You dont know how a mobile phone is like or what kind of functions it has, much less all the brands out there and the differences between the models.What gives?Will you:1. Sit at home and mull over what mobile phone you should buy, waiting for the answer would pop in at some point. Maybe an eureka will strike, maybe it wont ever, but either way you dont plan to do anything until the answer comes. OR 2. Get to know what a mobile phone is. Go out there and explore the different mobile phones available. If possible, you want to try them out too, say by using your friends mobiles and visiting the phone shops. Which option will help you make progress in your dilemma? Which option will give you new insights, new information, and new data points for you to base your decision on? Which option is a more reliable method to get you what you want?If you are thinking option 2, we are thinking the same thing.You see where Im getting at with this?The fog in your mindFor you to know what you want to do, you have to have some kind of experience you can refer to. Now, if you have never been out there getting into the thick of things, theres not going to be a lot of things to reference with in your mind. Theres a fog in your mind, and the fog exists because you have never ventured much beyond your current point.Its like asking whats your favorite sport when youve never exercised in your life. Or whats your favorite book when you only read less than a book a year. Or whats your favorite restaurant when you dont eat out at all.The fog will remain as long as you stay still. Itll still be uncertain, hazy, possibly confusing and disempowering. To clear out the fog, you need to explore. You need to get out there and start trying out different things. You need to gain experience, to pick up new knowledge, to get into new situations. By building up as many of these experiences as possible, you create a baseline reference point in your mind. The more experiences you get, the more knowledgeable you become, the clearer you are of what you dont like and what you do like, and the more you discover what you dont want to do and what you DO want to do.How I discovered what I truly want to do in lifeOne of the key things that helped me discover my purpose back in 2006 was because I went all out in all my goal pursuits and in pursuing my interests before that. It wasnt like I had complete clarity of what I wanted to do in life previously. All I knew (as a kid) was I wanted to make the best out of my life and be a person of value to the society, and that meant doing my best and achieving my highest potential.And that was what I did. I went all out to pursue my goals. I would put my heart and soul in everything I did. Whatever my goals were, from achievement goals, to academia goals, to business goals (I had a graphic design business last time, and ran a network of successful internet sites back when I was in secondary school), I would set my eyes on the top prize and go all out for them. Whatever my interests were, from making desktop wallpapers, to computer skins, to web/graphic design, to fashion/cosmetics, to gaming, I pursued them fervently. I never held back.The whole process of setting goals, strategizing, planning, taking action, reviewing the results and readjusting my plans, and finally achieving the results, was very eye opening. Every step of the journey, I learned something new about the world and myself. I grew as a person, and I became more self-aware. Discovered myself more, my strengths, blind spots, my values, what I liked, what I didnt like. I realized that things I thought were important to me were actually not what I wanted. I came to realizations I never saw coming.I would never have realized any single one of these things if I had never been fervent in pursuing my growth, my goals and interests. With the kind of energy I was putting in my pursuits, it exposed me to a good spectrum of different contexts and experiences. It was then a matter of time before I finally realized what I wanted to do.Gaining Experience: Breadth and DepthHence, the key to know what you want to do is to get out there and gain as much experience as you can both (1) Breadth of experiences (2) Depth of experiences.1. Breadth of experiences refers to the variety of things you do. Say if you have only studied engineering and worked as an engineer all your life, its time to start something new, thats different from engineering. It can be anything from dancing, drawing, finance, marketing, business, food & beverage, music, painting, etc. The more new things you try, the greater the breadth of experiences you build up. 2. Depth of experiences refers to the intensity of how much you have done something. If you have always viewed engineering with a lackluster attitude, never putting in the extra time to know it better, and just doing whats necessary to scrap by in the subject, youd be building an average level of experience with it. Whereas if you have intensely strove to be the top engineer, studying top engineers, taking on all new projects that emerge and reading the best engineering texts, your depth of experience is going to be way more in comparison. The depth of your experiences in the subject can increase by an increased time spent on it, as well as just increasing your focus and energy when you are doing it. Where to start off?At this point you must be wondering where to start first, since there are so many different possibilities. My recommendation will be to start off by doing the things you already have some interest in. (whether its interest to try or interest to pursue further). Heres a 5-step process to get you started on finding what you want to do.1. Take out a piece of pen and paper. For the next 30 minutes, please write out a list of all the things you have always wanted to try, but have never tried. Also, write down the things you would want to try today. Dont overthink it. Dont think about the feasibility. Dont think about how you are going to act on it. The point of this step is to know your WHAT first before devising your HOW. Just write. 2. After you are done, look back at the list. What are the things you are interested to try today? Circle them. It can be a few, it can be some, it can even be all. 3. Now, rank them. What is the thing you want to try out first? Label that as number 1. Then, move on to the thing you want to try next. Label that as number 2. And so on and so forth, until you get to the very last item you circled. 4. Now, its time to think about the HOW. How can you start trying the 1st few items you circled? Some of you may experience fear trying new things. Thats because you overcomplicate the process in your mind. You dont have to quit your job, stop your studies, or denounce whatever you are doing. You can continue what you are currently doing and try out something new, all at the same time. Just start off with little steps. Taking a course. Volunteering at a related organization. Consulting someone who is experienced in this area. Reading up on it. Draw up