英语小短文有关英语幽默小短文欣赏

英语小短文有关英语幽默小短文欣赏 幽默在中西方都是个古老而永恒的话题。它为人类所共有,也为人类所独有。了有关英语幽默小短文，欢迎阅读! The Astronaut Pen During the heat of the space race in the 1960s, the U.S. National Aeronautics and Space Administration decided it needed a ball point pen to write in the zero gravity confines of its space capsules. After considerable research and development, the Astronaut Pen was developed at a cost of approximately $1 million U.S. The pen worked and also enjoyed some modest suess as a novelty item back here on earth. The Soviet Union, faced with the same problem, used a pencil. 在二十世纪 _，美国和苏联正处于太空竞赛的白热化阶段，美国航空航天局决定研制一种圆珠笔，以便在太空舱重力为零的环境下仍然可以书写。经过大量的研发工作，花费了大约一百万美元的成本，太空笔终于研制出来了。那支笔果然可以在太空书写，在回到地球后，作为一样新奇的小玩意儿也确实吸引了一些目光。而面临着同样难题的苏联，则选择了一支铅笔。 An Absent Minded ProfessorA notoriously absentminded professor was one day observed walking along the street with one foot continually in the gutter，the other on the pavement. A pupil meeting him said： “Good evening，professor.How are you? “Well，” answered the professor，“I thought I was all right when I left home，but now I dont know whats the matter with me.Ive been limping for the last half hour.” 有一天，人们看见一个有名的心不在焉的老师在路上走，他的一只脚一直踏在街沟里，另一只脚踩在人行道上。 一个碰见他的学生说： “晚安，老师。您怎么了?” “啊，”这位老师回答说：“我想我离开家的时候还挺好的，可是现在我不知道出了什么毛病。我已经一瘸一拐走了半个小时了。” Its His FaultBilly and Bobby were small boys.They were brothers，and they often had fights with each other. Last Saturday their mother said to them，“Im going to cook our lunch now.Go out and play in the gardenand be good.” “Yes，Mummy，” the two boys answered，and they went out. They played in the garden for half an hour，and then Billy ran into the kitchen.“Mummy，” he said，“Bobbys broken a window in Mrs.Allens house.” Mrs.Allen was one of their neighbors. “Hes a bad boy，”his mother said.“How did he break it?” “I threw a stone at him，” Billy answered，“and he quickly moved down.” 比利和波比都是小男孩。他们是兄弟，两人经常打架。 上个星期六，他们的妈妈对他们说：“我现在要做午饭了。去，到花园去玩吧，别淘气。” “是，妈妈，”两个男孩回答，然后他们就出去了。他们在花园里玩了半个小时，然后比利跑进了厨房。“妈妈，”他说：“波比打碎了艾伦太太家的窗玻璃。”艾伦太太是他们的邻居。 “他是个坏孩子，”他的妈妈说。“他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?” “我朝他扔了一块石子，”比利回答：“他赶紧蹲下。” Three pastors in the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, You know, since summer started Ive been having trouble with bats in my loft(阁楼) and attic at church. Ive tried everything-noise, spray, cats-nothing seems to scare them away. Another said, Yes, me too. Ive got hundreds living in my belfry(钟楼) and in the attic. Ive been had the place fumigated(熏制) , and they still wont go away. The third said, I baptized(洗礼) all mine, and made them members of the church.havent seen one back since! 三个南部的牧师在一家小餐馆里吃午饭。其中的一个说道：“你们知道吗，自从夏天来临，我的教堂的阁楼和顶楼就被蝙蝠骚扰，我用尽了一切办法-噪音、喷雾、猫-似乎什么都不能把它们赶走。” 另外一位说：“是啊，我也是。在我的钟楼和阁楼也有好几百只。我曾经请人把整个地方用烟熏消毒一遍，它们还是赶不走。” 第三个