英语写作训练（上课）

写一完整的句子,句子的完整句子的连贯句子的简洁句子的多样化,写一个完整的句子,这几句是正确的句子吗?如果你认为有误,该怎么改?,1.Themeetingwilluntil3:00.,2.Workhard,youwillsucceed.,3.Ihaveabrother,whoisadoctor.4.Thereareonly4studentstakepartintheclass.,last,and,who,taking/totake,句子的分类,简单句:只包含一个主谓结构的句子.并列句:主谓结构+连词(and,but,so,or)+主谓结构(或更多的主谓结构)复合句:引导词+主谓结构,主谓结构(从句)(主句),五种基本的简单句,主语+不及物动词2.主语+及物动词+宾语,Birdsfly.Busesrunfromdawntillmidnight.Wearestudyinghard.,Wehavereadmanybooks.Theydoshoppingattheweekend.WearelearningEnglish.,3.主语+系动词+表语4.主语+及物动词+间接宾语+直接宾语5.主语+及物动词+宾语+宾语补足语,Wearestudents.Hebecameascientist.Thatsoundsgood.,HegaveTomapresent.Heofferedmeajob.,Wemadehimourmonitor.Themanagerthinkstheplanpractical.Hewillhavehisbikerepaired.Iwonthaveyouspeakingtoyourmotherlikethat.,并列句,1.用连词/副词(and,but,so,for,or,notonlybutalso,eitheror,neithernor,while,bothand,however,therefore),1)LiMingis18yearsoldandheisastudentinNo.1MiddleSchool.2)Hurryuporyoullbelateforschool.,3)Imustgonow,formysisteriswaitingforme.,2.用“;”3.用“;+adv”,1)Wefishedallday;wedidntcatchanything.,Wefishedallday;however,wedidntcatchanything.2)Thecarwasalmostnew;besides,itwasinexcellentcondition.,butwe,soall,2)Lilydoeswellinstudy;alltheteachersthinkhighlyofher.,复合句,复合句里包含两个或更多的主谓结构,其中有一个主谓结构为句子的主体称为主句，另一个些主谓结构为从句，他（们）只能充当句子的某一（些）成分，,如:主语,宾语,表语,同位语,定语,状语等.根据他们在句子中的功能分别称为主语从句,宾语从句,表语从句,同位语从句,定语从句,状语从句等.,判断下面句子属于哪种复合句,1)Whenweshallhaveoursportsmeetingisstillaquestion.2)ThelettersaysthattheyareleavingonFriday.3)Thatswhattheyshoulddo.4)WeexpressedthehopethattheywouldcomeandvisitChinaagain.5)ThisistheverydictionarythatIamlookingfor.6)Astimewenton,Einsteinstheoryprovedtobecorrect.,主语从句,宾语从句,表语从句,同位语从句,定语从句,状语从句,句子的连贯,Faulty:Amanisjudgednotonlybywhathesaysbutalsobyhisdeeds.Faulty:Theideahementionedatfirstsoundedgood.,1.Amanisjudgednotonlybywhathesaysbutalsobywhathedoes.2.Amanisjudgednotonlybyhiswordsbutalsobyhisdeeds.,1.Theideahefirstmentionedsoundedgood.2.Theideahementionedsoundedgoodatfirst.,前后的一致、对等、平衡,连贯性的要求是：句子前后之间要有照应，有衔接，思想的表达应该有序，清楚句子与句子之间的过渡要符合逻辑，不能造成歧义或矛盾,句子的简洁,文字简洁.,如下面这些短语均可用括号中的词代替:fromtimetotime(often),drawaconclusion(conclude),withanger(angrily),Itisclearthat(clearly),试比较下列改写的句子.,Doyouknowthemanwhoisspeakingatthemeeting?Lookoutforcarswhileyouarecrossingthestreet?,Doyouknowthemanspeakingatthemeeting?,Lookoutforcarswhilecrossingthestreet?,2.避免使用同义词重复.(如下面的这些句子,划线部分重复,应删掉).,1).Heisblindinbotheyes.Heisblindinthelefteye.2).Inmyopinion,Ithinkyourplanisfeasible.3).Thedeskisroundinshapeandredincolor.4).Ishallaccompanymymotherbygoingwithhertothemarket.,练习:改写下列句子,使其更简洁,1.Hegavemanyreasonsforthefailure,butthereasonshegavewerenotconvincing.2.TheGreatWall,whichhasahistoryofmorethan2000years,isoneoftheworldheritages.,Hegavemanyreasonsforthefailure,butnoneofthemwasconvincing.,TheGreatWallwithahistoryofmorethan2000yearsisoneoftheworldheritages.,练习:改写下列句子,使其更简洁,3.Heattendedthepartythoughhewasbadlyill.4.NieEr,whoisthecomposeroftheNationalAnthemforthePeoplesRepublicofChina,wasborninYunnaninFebruary1912.,Heattendedthepartyinspiteofhisillness.,NieEr,thecomposeroftheNationalAnthemforthePeoplesRepublicofChina,wasborninYunnaninFebruary1912.,练习:改写下列句子,使其更简洁,8.Doyouknowthegirlwhoisdressedinred?Doyouknowthegirl_.9.Theprofessorwalkedintotheclassroomandhecarriedabagofbookswithhim.Theprofessorwalkedintotheclassroom,_.10.Themanwhoisstandingbythewindowisourteacher.Theman_isourteacher.,（dressed）inred,carryingabagofbookswithhim,standingbythewindow,练习:改写下列句子,使其更简洁,11.Wedidntknowhertelephonenumber,sowecouldntgetintouchwithher._,wecouldntgetintouchwithher.12.JohnsonlookedlikeamanwhowaswantedinLosAngelesforrobbery.Johnsonlookedlikeaman_.13.Wefinallyreachedhomeat10pm,andweweretiredandhungry.Wefinallyreachedhomeat10pm,_.,Notknowinghertelephonenumber,wantedinLosAngelesforrobbery,tiredandhungry,基础写作的评分标准:,准确性:句子的表达要符合语法规范.完整性:题目所列举的信息要表达完整连贯性:整段话是一个篇章,句子之间要衔接自然,能恰当地使用连词,不是单纯的翻译句子复杂性:无,基础写作四重奏:,1.信息划分:确定哪些相关的信息可用一句话表达,确保5个句子表达完所有的信息.建议可在题目上用铅笔做,的标志(完整性)2.列出关键词组和句型(准确性)3.串联句子:用正确的语法结构写出准确的句子,并形成篇章(连贯性)4.检查(准确性),步骤四:检查,1.时态2.主谓一致3.名词单复数4.单词拼写5.动词的过去式,过去分词6.句子是否完整,1.地理位置:在广东省深圳的南面2.人口约600万,面积1000余平方公里3.交通:有现代化的港口及著名的国际机场,新修建的京九铁路把香港和祖国首都北京连接起来4.历史:香港自古以来是中国领土.150多年前英国入侵香港,占领香港5.回归:1997年7月1日,写作要求1题目：HongKong2必须使用5个句子介绍全部所给的内容3将5个句子组织成连贯的短文,步骤二：句子所需的词汇，短语和句型,步骤一:信息划分(本题提示清晰,这步可省略),1.地理位置:在广东省深圳的南面belocated/situated-tothesouthof2.人口约600万,面积1000余平方公里hasapopulationof/Thepopulationofis-coveranareaof,3.交通:有现代化的港口及著名的国际机场,新修建的京九铁路把香港和祖国首都北京连接起来4.历史:香港自古以来是中国领土.150多年前英国入侵香港,占领香港5.回归:1997年7月1日,modernseaport-internationalairport-newly-builtrailway-connectwith,belongto-invade-occupy,returntoChina-onJuly1st,1997,：HongKongHongKongliestothesouthofShenzhen,GuangdongProvinceofChina.Ithasapopulationofabout6,000,000andcoversanareaofmorethan1,000squarekilometers.IthasnotonlythemodernseaportbutalsothefamousNewInternationalAirport;Thenewly-builtrailwayfromBeijingtoJiulongconnectsHongKongwiththecapitalofourcountry.,范文:,步骤三：连词成句，连句成篇,：HongKongSincelong