愚人节英语搞笑对话

愚人节英语搞笑对话 愚人节英语笑话 1. why are people tired on april fools day? (愚人节人们为什么疲倦?) 答：because they have just had a long march. ( 因为他们刚过了长长的三月。march 三月;行军) 2.what weather do mice and rats fear? (老鼠害怕什么天气?) 答：when its raining cats and dogs.(下大雨。rain cats and dogs 下大雨 ) 3.when do dogs refuse to follow their masters? (狗什么时候不愿跟随主人?) 答：when their masters go to the flea market.(主人去跳蚤市场时。flea 跳蚤 flea market 旧货市场 ) 4.what question can never be answered by “yes”? (哪个问题永远不能回答“是的”?) 答：are you asleep? (你睡着了吗) 5.what tree is always very sad? (那种树总是很伤心?) 答：weeping willow. ( 垂柳 weep哭泣 willow柳树) 6.when can you get water with a ? (什么时候可以用网兜装水?) 答：when water is turned into ice. (当水结成冰时) 7.why is the pig always eating?猪为什么没完没了地吃? 答：hes making a hog of himself.它想成为一只肉猪。 8.whats the longest word in the world?世界上最长的单词是什么? 答：smiles. because theres a mile between the letter s.微笑。因为两个字母s中间隔了一里。 9.what question is that to which you must always answer yes? 什么问题你只能回答“yes”? 答：what does y-e-s spell? (当别人问你)“yes”怎么拼? 10.where were you when the power was cut off? 当停电的时候你在哪? 答：in the darkness. 在黑暗中 The Swiss Spaghetti Harvest The respected BBC news show Panorama announced that thanks to a very mild winter and the virtual elimination of the dreaded spaghetti weevil, Swiss farmers were enjoying a bumper spaghetti crop. It aompanied this announcement with footage of Swiss peasants pulling strands of spaghetti down from trees. Huge numbers of viewers were taken in. Many called the BBC wanting to know how they could grow their own spaghetti tree. To this the BBC diplomatically replied, place a sprig of spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best. Sid Finch Sports Illustrated published a story about a new rookie pitcher who planned to play for the Mets. His name was Sidd Finch, and he could reportedly throw a baseball at 168 mph with pinpoint auracy. This was 65 mph faster than the previous record. Surprisingly, Sidd Finch had never even played the game before. Instead, he had mastered the art of the pitch in a Tibetan monastery under the guidance of the great poet-saint Lama Malarias. Mets fans celebrated their teams amazing luck at having found such a gifted player, and Sports Illustrated was flooded with requests for more information. In reality this legendary player only existed in the imagination of the author of the article, George Plimpton。 Instant Color TV In 1962 there was only one TV channel in Sweden, and it broadcast in black and white. The stations technical expert, Knell Stemson, appeared on the news to announce that, thanks to a new technology, viewers could convert their existing sets to display color reception. All they had to do was pull a nylon stocking over their TV screen. Stemson proceeded to demonstrate the process. Thousands of people were taken in. Regular color broadcasts only menced in Sweden on April 1, 1970. The Taco Liberty Bell The Taco Bell Corporation announced it had bought the Liberty Bell and was renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. Hundreds of outraged citizens called the National Historic Park in Philadelphia where the bell was housed to express their anger. Their nerves were only calmed when Taco Bell revealed, a few hours later, that it was all a practical joke. The best line of the day came when White House press secretary Mike McCurry was asked about the sale. Thinking on his feet, he responded that the Lincoln Memorial had also been sold. It would now be known, he said, as the Ford Lincoln Mercury Memorial。 San Sherriff The British newspaper The Guardian published a special seven-page supplement devoted to San Sherriff, a small republic said to consist of several semi-colon-shaped islands located in the Indian Ocean. A series of articles affectionately described the geography and culture of this obscure nation. Its two main islands were named Upper Cuisse and Lower Cuisse. Its capital was Bodoni, and its leader was General Pica. The Guardians phones rang all day as readers sought more information about the idyllic holiday spot. Only a few noticed that everything about the island was named after printers terminology。 Nixon for President 1992: National Public Radios Talk of the Nation program announced that Richard Nixon, in a surprise move, was running for President again. His new campaign slogan was, I didnt do anything wrong, and I wont do it again. Aompanying this announcement were audio clips of Nixon delivering his candidacy speech. Listeners responded viscerally to the announcement, flooding the show with calls expressing shock and outrage. Only during the second half of the show did the host John Huckleberry reveal that the announcement was a practical joke. Nixons voice was impersonated by edian Rich Little. Alabama Changes the Value of Pi The April 1998 issue of the New Mexicans for Science and Reason newsletter contained an article claiming that the Alabama state legislature had voted to change the value of the mathematical constant pi from 3.14159 to the Biblical value of 3.0. Soon the article made its way onto the inter, and then it rapidly spread around the world, forwarded by email. It only became apparent how far the article had spread when the Alabama legislature began receiving hundreds of calls from people protesting the legislation. The original article, which was intended as a parody of legislative attempts to circumscribe the teaching of evolution, was written by physicist Mark Bo slough. The Left-Handed Whopper 1998: Burger King published a full page advertisement in USA Today announcing the introduction of a new item to their menu: a Left-Handed Whopper specially designed for the 32 million left-handed Americans. Aording to the advertisement, the new whopper included the same ingredients as the original Whopper (lettuce, tomato, hamburger patty, etc.), but all the condiments were rotated 180 degrees for the benefit of their left-handed customers. The following day Burger King issued a follow-up release revealing that although the Left-Handed Whopper was a hoax, thousands of customers had gone into restaurants to request the new sandwich. Simultaneously, aording to the press release, many others requested their own right handed version. Hotheaded Naked Ice Borers Discover Magazine reported that the highly respected wildlife biologist Dr. April Pizza had found a new species in Antarctica: the hotheaded naked ice borer. These fascinating creatures had bony plates on their heads that, fed by numerous blood vessels, could bee burning hot, allowing the animals to bore through ice at high speeds. They used this ability to hunt penguins, melting the ice beneath the penguins and causing them to sink downwards into the resulting slush where the hotheads consumed them. After much research, Dr. Pizza theorized that the hotheads might have been responsible for the mysterious disappearance of noted Antarctic explorer Philippe Poisson in 1837. To the ice borers, he would have looked like a penguin, the article quoted her as saying. Discover received more mail in response to this article than they had received for any other article in their history. Plaary Alignment Decreases Gravity The British astronomer Patrick Moore announced on BBC Radio 2 that at 9:47 AM a once-in-a-lifetime astronomical event was going to our that listeners could experience in their very own homes. The pla Pluto would pass behind Jupiter, temporarily causing a gravitational alignment that would counteract and lessen the Earths own gravity. Moore told his The Swiss Spaghetti Harvest 瑞士面条树 spaghetti harvest1957: The respected BBC news show Panorama announced that thanks to a very mild winter and the virtual elimination of the dreaded spaghetti weevil, Swiss farmers were enjoying a bumper spaghetti crop. It aompanied this announcement with footage of Swiss peasants pulling strands of spaghetti down from trees. Huge numbers of viewers were taken in. Many called the BBC wanting to know how they could grow their own spaghetti tree. To this the BBC diplomatically replied, place a sprig of spaghetti in a tin of tomato sauce and hope for the best. 1957年愚人节BBC新闻中说，瑞士的面条树大丰收，农民都在树上收割面条。大量观众上当受骗，打电话来咨询面条树的种植方法。BBC对此的回复是：把一根面条插在番茄酱里，然后就等着吧。 点评：面条树都有人信，不知道摇钱树有没有人信？ Sidd Finch 虚拟棒球天才 Sidd Finch1985: Sports Illustrated published a story about a new rookie pitcher who planned to play for the Mets. His name was Sidd Finch, and he could reportedly throw a baseball at 168 mph with pinpoint auracy. This was 65 mph faster than the previous record. Surprisingly, Sidd Finch had never even played the game before. Instead, he had mastered the art of the pitch in a Tibetan monastery under the guidance of the great poet-saint Lama Milaraspa. Mets fans celebrated their teams amazing luck at having found such a gifted player, and Sports Illustrated was flooded with requests for more information. In reality this legendary player only existed in the imagination of the author of the article, George Plimpton。 1985年愚人节，运动画刊杂志发布一条假消息，称一个名为Sidd Finch的新人棒球投球手，能投出168mph时速的球，比当时记录高出65mph；而且这位 新人之前都没有玩过棒球！他在一个西藏的寺庙里学会了投球的艺术。大批棒球粉丝因此被骗。其实这个只是文章作者瞎编的。 点评：要在中国，你说男足出了一个天才，谁信？ Instant Color TV 即时彩色电视 image1962: In 1962 there was only one tv channel in Sweden, and it broadcast in black and white. The stations technical expert, Kjell Stensson, appeared on the news to announce that, thanks to a new technology, viewers could convert their existing sets to display color reception. All they had to do was pull a nylon stocking over their tv screen. Stensson proceeded to demonstrate the process. Thousands of people were taken in. Regular color broadcasts only menced in Sweden on April 1, 1970. 1962年愚人节，当时瑞典还只有一个电视频道， 而且是黑白的。电视台的技术人员当天在新闻中说，彩色电视已经研发成功，用户只需拿一双尼龙袜盖在电视屏幕上就行。还真有人信了。 点评：我如果说，沪江网全面升级，成为全球第一家3D网站，你们信么？ The Taco Liberty Bell 塔可自由钟 Taco Liberty Bell1996: The Taco Bell Corporation announced it had bought the Liberty Bell and was renaming it the Taco Liberty Bell. Hundre