1.读后续写 - 动作细节描写.ppt

动作细节描写,byKevinSoy,读后续写专项训练1,OneweekendinJuly,Janeandherhusband,Tom,haddriventhreehourstocampovernightbyalakeintheforest.Unfortunately,onthewayanunpleasantsubjectcameupandtheystartedtoquarrel.Bythetimetheyreachedthelake,JanewassoangrythatshesaidtoTom.“Imgoingtofindabetterspotforustocamp”andwalkedaway.Withnopathtofollow,Janejustwalkedonforquitealongtime.Aftershehadclimbedtoahighplace.sheturnedaround,hopingtoseethelake.Tohersurprise,shesawnothingbutforestand,farbeyond,asnowcappedmountaintop.Shesuddenlyrealizedthatshewaslost.“Tom!”shecried.Help!Noreply.IfonlyshehadnotlefthermobilephoneinthatbagwithTom.Janekeptmoving,butthefarthershewalked,themoreconfusedshebecame.Asnightwasbeginningtofall,Janewassotiredthatshehadtostopforthenight.Lyingawakeinthedark,JanewantedverymuchtobewithTomandherfamily.Shewantedtoholdhimandtellhimhowmuchshelovedhim.Janeroseatthebreakofday,hungryandthirsty.Shecouldhearwatertrickling(滴落)somewhereatadistance.Quicklyshefollowedthesoundtoastream.Tohergreatjoy,shealsosawsomeberrybushes.Shedrankandateafewberries.Neverinherlifehadshetastedanythingbetter.Feelingstrongernow.Janebegantowalkalongthestreamandhopeitwouldleadhertothelake.Asshepickedherwaycarefullyalongthestream,Janeheardahelicopter.Isthatforme?Unfortunately,thetreesmadeitimpossibleforpeopletoseeherfromabove.Afewminuteslater,anotherhelicopterflewoverhead.Janetookoffheryellowblouse,thinkingthatsheshouldgotoanopenareaandflagthemiftheycamebackagain.(2016.10浙江),小结,动作细节的描写应该围绕着一个中心展开，否则会导致叙述散乱，内容混杂；动作细节的描写应该组织一系列的动词，以动作的次第发生来叙述整个过程；动作细节的描写应该有相应信息的支撑，以丰富细节内容，增强可读性。,1.上周日李华坐公交车去新华书店买书，过程却不太顺利。请设计一个情节，描述具体经过，词数80左右。LastSunday,LiHuawenttoXinhuaBookstoretobuyabook._,1.上周日李华坐公交车去新华书店买书，过程却不太顺利。请设计一个情节，描述具体经过，词数80左右。,去书店的路上不顺利,在书店买书不顺利,出门公交车没来发现公交车停开换车车子故障很晚到达书店,喜欢的书只剩一本其他顾客拿到那本询问售货员售货员又找到一本书本破损买到后发现对面商店有同款,LastSunday,LiHuawenttoXinhuaBookstoretobuyabook.Afterbreakfast,hecametothebusstopnearhishome.Aswasscheduled,thebusshouldarrivein5minutes.However,hewaitedforabout10minutesbutnobuscame.Afewminuteslater,heandotherpassengersweretoldtogetonanotherbuswhichwentonadifferentroute.Halfway,thebusbrokedown.Asaresult,hehadtochangethebusagain.Finally,hegottothebookstoreatthelunchtime,almosttwohourslaterthanexpected.,2.Jeff是一位非常关心学生的老师，昨天午饭后班里同学Kate突然鼻子流血不止。请设计一个情节详细描述Jeff采取的行动重点体现他对学生的关爱。约80词。YesterdayJeffwasintheclassroomtalkingtoastudentafterlunch._,2.Jeff是一位非常关心学生的老师，昨天午饭后班里同学Kate突然鼻子流血不止。请设计一个情节详细描述Jeff才去的行动重点体现他对学生的关爱。约80词。,Jeff在教室里解决了问题,Jeff未能解决问题，因而求助医生,体现出Jeff的急切和关爱。,YesterdayJeffwasintheclassroomtalkingtoastudentafterlunch.SuddenlyKatesnosestartedtobleed.JeffrushedtoKateinnotime.HetoldKatetoleanherheadbackwards.Afterthat,hegotsometissuefromastudentandtriedtocleanKatesmouthandcheeks.Findingherbleedingimpossibletostop,Jeffphonedthedoctortoaskwhattodo.ThedoctoradvisedKatetobesenttohimassoonaspossible.Immediately,JeffwenttothedoctorwithKate.Hestayedtherewithheruntilshewasfinetwohourslater.,实战演练,3.王涛即将大学毕业，正在寻找工作，上周他参加了一次面试。请设计一个情节详细描述他进入面试房间后的动作，突出当时相对压抑的氛围。80词左右Hearinghisnamecalled,WangTaoopenedthedoorandsteppedin._,Hearinghisnamecalled,WangTaoopenedthedoorandsteppedin.Heimmediatelyfeltstaredat.Threejudges,seatedbehindthedesk,examinedhimfromheadtofeet.WangTaocheckedhissuit,findingnothingimproperandthenrelaxedabit.Afterhewasallowedtotakeaseat,WangTaoglancedatthejudgesandq