new英语写作常见病句与分析

1、1英语写作常见病句与分析2熟悉与掌握CET-4作文评分原则3l 作 文l 熟悉与掌握CET-4作文评分原则、标准及其分析l 1、总体评分原则l 大学英语四、六级考试作文采用的是总体评分方法，阅卷人员就总的印象给出奖励分，而不是按语言点的错误数目来扣分。这种评分方法的好处在于能更注重内容和篇章的结构，也更能客观地反应考生表达思想的能力。l 评分是从内容和语言两个方面对作文进行综合的评判。考生应该相应做到：l 言简意赅，逻辑性强。考生在写作时必须选取最能说明问题的语言以最合乎逻辑的方式安排层次，使之环环相扣，说服力强。考应对自己要从几个方面阐明主题、每个方面需用怎样的方法来说明等心中有数，语言规范

2、，避免语法错误。试时尽量选用自己熟悉的句型和表达。字迹清晰，标点正确。4l 2、具体评分标准l 1）本题满分为15分。l 2）阅卷标准共分五等：14分、11分、 8分、5分及2分。l 3）阅卷人员根据阅卷标准，对照参照卷评分，若认为与某一分数（如8分）相似，即定为该分数（即8分）；若认为稍优或稍劣于该分数，则可加一分（即9分）或减一分（即7分）。但不得加或减半分。5l 4）评分标准l 14分切题。表达思想清楚，文字通顺，连贯性较好。基本上无语言错误，仅有个别小错。l 11分切题。表达思想清楚，文字连贯，但有少量语言错误。l 8分基本切题。有些地方表达思想不够清楚，文字勉强连贯；语言错误相当多，

3、其中有一些是严重错误。l 5分基本切题。表达思想不清楚，连贯性差。有较多的严重语言错误。l 2分条理不清，思路紊乱，语言支离破碎或大部分句子均有错误，且多数为严重错误。6l 一）不一致（Disagreements）l 所谓不一致不仅指主谓不一致，还包括数的不一致、时态的不一致及代词不一致等。例如：l When one have money, he can do what he want to.l 人一旦有了钱，他就能做想做的事。7l 剖析：one是单数第三人称，因而本句的have应改为has;同理,want应改为wants。本句是典型的主谓不一致。l 改为：Once one has monke

4、y, he can do what he wants( to do).8l （二）、修饰语错位（Misplaced Modifiers）l 英语与汉语不同，同一个修饰语置于句子不同的位置，句子的含义可能引起变化。对于这一点中国学生往往没有引起足够的重视，因而造成了不必要的误解。例如：l I believe I can do it well and I will better know the world outside the campus.l 剖析：better位置不当，应置于句末。9l （三）句子不完整（Sentence Fragments）l 在口语中，交际双方可借助手势、语气、上下文等

5、，不完整的句子完全可以被理解。可是书面语就不同了，句子结构不完整则意思表达不清，这种情况常常发生在主句写完以后，笔者又想加些补充说明时发生。例如：l There are many ways to know the society. For example by TV, radio, newspaper and so on.10l 剖析：本句后半部分“For example by TV, radio, newspaper and so on.”不是一个完整的句子，仅为一些不连贯的词语，不能独立成句。l 改为：There are many ways to know the society, for

6、 example, by TV, radio, newspaper.11l （四）悬垂修饰语（Dangling Modifiers）l 所谓悬垂修饰语是指句首的短语与后面句子的逻辑关系混乱不清。例如：l At the age of ten, my grandfather died.l 剖析：这句中“at the age of ten”只点出十岁时，但没有说明“谁”十岁时，按一般推理不可能是my grandfather 。如果我们把这个悬垂修饰语改明确一点，全句就不那么费解了。l 改为：When I was ten, my grandfather died.12l 又如：To do well i

7、n college, good grades are essential.l 剖析：句中不定式短语“to do well in college”的逻辑主语不清楚。l 改为：To do well in college, a student needs good grades.13l （五）词性误用（Misuse of Parts of Speech）l 词性误用常表现为：介词当动词用；形容词当副词用；名词当动词用等。例如：l None can negative the importance of money.l 剖析：negative系形容词，误作动词。l 改为：None can deny th

8、e importance of money.14l （六）指代不清（Ambiguous Reference of Pronouns）l 指代不清主要讲的是代词与被指代的人或物关系不清，或者先后所用的代词不一致。试看下面这一句：l Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted her to be her bridesmaid.玛丽和我姐姐很要好，因为她要做她的伴娘。l 剖析：读完上面这一句话，读者无法明确地判断两位姑娘中谁将结婚，谁将当伴娘。如果我们把易于引起误解的代词所指的对象加以明确，意思就一目了然了。这个句子可l 改为：Mary was

9、 friendly to my sister because she wanted my sister to be her bridesmaid.15l 又如：We can also know the society by serving it yourself.l 剖析：句中人称代词we和反身代词yourself指代不一致。l 改为：We can also know society by serving it ourselves.16l （七）不间断句子（Run-on Sentences）l 什么叫run-on sentences？请看下面的例句：l There are many ways

10、we get to know the outside world.l 剖析：这个句子包含了两层完整的意思：“There are many ways.”以及“We get to know the outside world”。简单地把它们连在一起就不妥当了。l 改为：There are many ways for us to learn about the outside world.l 或：There are many ways through which we can become acquainted with the outside world.17l （八）措词毛病（Troubles

11、in Diction）l Diction是指在特定的句子中如何适当地选用词语的问题，由于教学时间紧迫，教师平时在这方面花的时间往往及其有限，使得学生在写作中没有养成良好的推敲、斟酌的习惯。他们往往随心所欲，拿来就用。所以作文中用词不当的错误比比皆是。如：l The increasing use of chemical obstacles in agriculture also makes pollution.农业方面化学物质使用的不断增加也造成了污染。l 剖析：显然，考生把obstacles“障碍、障碍物”误作substance“物质”了。另外“the increasing use（不断增加的

12、使用）”应改为“abusive use（滥用）”。l 改为：The abusive use of chemical substances in agriculture also causes/leads to pollution.18l （九）累赘（Redundancy）l 言以简洁为贵。写句子没有一个多余的词；写段落没有一个无必要的句子。能用单词的不用词组；能用词组的不用从句或句子。如：l In spite of the fact that he is lazy, I like him.l 剖析：本句的“the fact that he is lazy”系同谓语从句，我们按照上述“能用词组的

13、不用从句”可以改为：In spite of his laziness, I like him.19l 又如：For the people who are diligent and kind, money is just the thing to be used to buy the thing they need.l 剖析：整个句子可以大大简化。l 改为：Diligent, caring people use money only to buy what they need.20l （十）不连贯（Incoherence）l 不连贯是指一个句子前言不对后语，或是结构上不畅通。这也是考生常犯的毛病

14、。如：l The fresh water, it is the most important things of the earth.l 剖析：The fresh water与逗号后的it不连贯。It与things在数方面不一致。l 改为：Fresh water is the most important thing in the world.21l （十一）中式英语l 有时学生作文中的句式的错误是因为受到了中国人的思维及汉语表达习惯的影响，这一点应引起考生的重视。以下是常见的由于中国人的思维而导致的病句：l Sometimes people set off firecrackers to c

15、elebrate the red and white happy events.22 l l 改为：Sometimes people set off firecrackers to celebrate ones wedding or honor the dead in his funeral.23l 考生在写作中经常出现下面几种错误：l 1）不必要的改变时态，比如：l In the movie, Robert Redford was a spy. He goes to his office where he found everybody dead. Other spies wanted to

16、 kill him, so he takes refuge with Julie Christie. At her house, he had waited for the heat to die down, but they come after him anyway.l 2）不必要的改变单复数，比如：l Everybody looks for satisfaction in his life. They want to be happy. But if he seeks only pleasure in the short run, the person will soon run out

17、 of pleasure and life will catch up to him. They need to pursue the deeper pleasure of satisfaction in work and in relationships.24l 3）不必要的改变人称，比如：l Now more than ever, parents need to be in touch with their childrens activities because modern life has the tendency to cause cleavages in the family.

18、You need to arrange family like it so that family members will do things together and know one another. You need to give up isolated pleasures of your own and realize that parents have a set of obligations to sponsor togetherness and therefore sponsor knowledge.l 因此写作中，一定要注意时态，人称以及数的变化是否正确，要注意保持一致。

19、25词语的变化l According to a recent survey, more and more people express a strong desire to l According to a recent survey, a growing number of people express a strong desire tol 根据最近的一项调查，越来越多的人表达了 26l These days, people in growing numbers are beginning to complain that work is more stressful and less l

20、eisurely than in past. Many experts point out that, along with the development of modern society, it is an inevitable result and there is no way to avoid it.现在，越来越多的人们开始抱怨工作比以前更有压力。许多专家指出这是现代社会发展必然的结果，无法避免。27l Today an increasing number of people have realized that law education is of great importan

21、ce. In order to keep law and order, every one of us is supposed to get a law education.现在，愈来愈多的人认识到法制教育的重要性。为了维护社会治安 ，我们每人都应该接受法制教育。28l Population problems is bigger and bigger, we have no room to live in earth(病句).l One of the problems is the overgrowth of population or population explosion，there m

22、ay even be no standing space on earth.l The population is increasing at a running speed and is threatening the existence of human being.29l Environmental pollution causes many strange diseases and people suffer from it.病句l Deterioration of natural environment leads to many deadly or unidentified dis

23、eases and brings actual harm to peoples health.30l Cutting forests kill many animals, and people let so many plants disappear.病句l Excessive Deforestation(滥砍滥伐） endangers many animals, and mankinds great thirst for water and other resources leads to the extinction of many species and plant forms.31l

24、Economic development bring us good, but it also bring us bad effect on the earth.病句l While we cannot do without economic development these days, we cannot ignore the fact that it has an adverse (or unfavorable )effect on the planet.32l As I said above, everybody must move on and should do everything

25、 to protect environment.病句l Every individual should make joint efforts to keep the balance of ecosystem.33l As the development of economy, the environment is becomes focused on by more and more people.病句l As l 连接词 conj. l 1.在期间, 当时候 I was coming in as he was going out.l 我进来的时候, 他正出去。l 2.尽管, 即使, 虽然 I

26、ntelligent as you are, I suspect you will fail.l 尽管你聪明, 我猜想你会失败。l 3.像一样 l 4.由于, 因为 As you werent there I left a message.l 因为你不在那里, 我留了个信儿。l 5.照方式 l 6.正如；如同 34语义丰富的句式35l 近几十年，尽管人们的生活有了惊人的改变，但必须承认，由于学费和书费日益飞涨，资金短缺仍然是学生们面临的最大问题之一。36l 句型：Although peoples lives have been dramatically changed over the las

27、t decades, it must be admitted that, shortage of funds is still the one of the biggest questions that students nowadays have to face because that tuition fees and prices of books are soaring by the day.近几十年，尽管人们的生活有了惊人的改变，但必须承认，由于学费和书费日益飞涨，资金短缺仍然是学生们面临的最大问题之一。37l 人们普遍认为我们的现代科技使我们的社会发生了巨大的变化，近几十年人类在科

28、技方面取得了惊人的进步。38l It is commonly thought that our society had dramatically changed by modern science and technology, and human had made extraordinary progress in knowledge and technology over the recent decades.人们普遍认为我们的现代科技使我们的社会发生了巨大的变化，近几十年人类在科技方面取得了惊人的进步。39l Environmental experts point out that in

29、creasing pollution not only causes serious problems such as global warming, but also could threaten to end human life on our planet.环境学家指出：持续增加的污染不仅会导致像全球变暖这样严重的问题，而且还将威胁到人类在这个星球的生存。40l In view of such serious situation, environmental tools of transportation like bicycle are more important than any

30、time before.考虑到这些严重的状况，我们比以往任何时候更需要像自行车这样的环保型交通工具。41l This is a matter of life and death-a matter no country can afford to ignore.这是一个关系到生死的问题，任何国家都不能忽视。l We should spare no effort to beautify our environment.我们应该不遗余力地美化我们的环境。42l There is no denying the fact that air pollution is an extremely seriou

31、s problem: the city authorities should take strong measures to deal with it.无可否认，空气污染是一个极其严重的问题：城市当局应该采取有力措施来解决它。l Any government, which is blind to this point, may pay a heavy price.任何政府忽视这一点都将付出巨大的代价。43l 引起关注的表达： l The problem of international tourism has caused wide public concern over the recent

32、 years.近些年，国际旅游的问题引起了广泛关注。l This phenomenon has caused major concern in many places of world.这一现象在全世界许多地方已引起了关注。44l 造成影响的表达l In addition, in order to attract tourists, a lot of artificial facilities have been built, which have certain unfavorable effects on the environment. 另外，为了吸引旅游者，大量人工设施被修建，这对环境

33、是不利的。l l But what these people fail to see is that international tourism may bring about a disastrous impact on our environment and local history. 但是这些人忽视了国际旅游可能会给当地环境和历史造成的灾难性的影响。45l 比较表达：l Although rural emigrants contribute greatly to the economic growth of the cities, they may inevitably bring a

34、bout many negative impacts.尽管民工对城市的经济发展做出了巨大贡献，然而他们也不可避免的带来了一些负面影响。 46l 强调：l There is no denying that the qualities of our living have gone from bad to worse.无可否认，我们的生活品质已经每况愈下。l It is universally acknowledged that trees are indispensable to us.全世界都知道树木对我们是不可或缺的。47l The reason why we have to grow tr

35、ees is that they can supply fresh air for us.我们必须种树的原因是它们能供应我们新鲜的空气。l It is time the authorities took proper steps to solve the traffic problems.该是有关当局采取适当的措施来解决交通问题的时候了。 48l My suggestions to deal with the problem are as follows. To begin with, it is urgent to create nature reserves. Secondly, cert

36、ain rare wild animals that are going to be extinct should be collected, fed and reproduced artificially. Finally, those who hunter them must be punished severely.我对解决这个问题的建议如下：首先，迫在眉睫的是建立自然保护区。其次，有些濒临灭绝的珍稀野生动物应该收捕、人工喂养并繁殖。最后，对于捕猎珍稀野生动物的人必须严惩。49CET4考生不易写好的结构l 1.“There be”结构50l 1“There be”结构l 考生病句：l a

37、. There are many people like to go to the movies.l b. There are different kinds of vegetables can be bought on the market by people.51l 正确表达：l a. There are many people who like to go to the movies. l b. There are different kinds of vegetables that people can buy on the market.l 剖析：这两个例句的错误较有普遍性，因为在历

38、次考试中都有不少考生不能正确运用there be 这一最常用的句式。在这种结构中，there是引导词，没有实际意义。be在句中作谓语，有时态和数的变化。例如：52l a. There was no school in the village at that time.(=there was not a school) l 注意：在否定句中，否定词用no，也可用 not a或not any。not a后接单数名词，not any后接复述名词，no后面的名词单复数都可以。l b. There is not a moment to be lost.l c. There are many people

39、 rushing into the cities every year.l e. There is no use holding back the wheel of history.l 从以上例句还可看出，句中的主语后面可接多种修饰语，如介词短语、不定式短语、定语从句、分词短语等等。这无疑使该结构增加了表现力，使句子表达的内容更加丰富。在运用这一结构时，考生最容易犯的错误是在there be 之后又用了一个动词作谓语，使句子结构出现严重错误。53l 2比较结构l 考生病句：l The climate in Beijing is colder than other cities.54l 正确表达

40、：l The climate in Beijing is colder than that of other cities.l 剖析：在上例中，考生误将“天气”与“城市”进行比较，而二者没有可比性，只有将后者改为“其他城市的天气”才符合逻辑。很显然，考生的错误是受了汉语表达习惯的影响。l 比较结构是常用结构，正确地使用这一结构可以使文章的句式增加变化，有利于提高写作成绩。55l 下面是比较结构的一些常见的表达方法l 同级比较l a. In 1998 we produced as many cars as we did in the previous five years.l b. We hav

41、e accomplished as much in the past three years as would have taken ten years in the past.l 比较级l a. Children now enjoy better medical treatment than before.l b. We can live longer without food than we can (live) without water.56l 最高级l a. This is the most interesting book Ive ever read.l b. Of all his

42、 novels I like this one best.57l the morethe more结构l a. The harder you work , the greater progress you will make.l b. The more a man knows, the more he discovers his ignorance.58l 选择比较l a. I prefer staying at home to going out.l b. They prefer to work rather than (to) sit idly.l c. He prefers to wor

43、k alone.l 对比l a. Motion is absolute while stagnation is relative.l b. He is tired out, whereas she is full of vigor.593表达原因的结构60l 3表达原因的结构l 考生病句：l a. The real reason to our failure is not far to seek.l b. The reason for this is because some people want to earn plenty of money without working hard.61

44、l 正确表达：l a. The real reason for our failure is not far to seek.l b. The reason for this is that some people want to earn plenty of money without working hard.l 剖析：第一个句子属搭配错误。根据英语习惯reason后应接介词for；第二句是中国学生常犯的错误，就是用because引导表语从句，但是按照英语习惯，because这个词不能引导表语从句，在本句中只能改用that才正确。l 掌握好表达原因的结构是十分重要的，几乎所有的写作试题都要

45、求写原因或可以写原因。在英语专业四级考试、甚至研究生入学英语考试以及TOEFL考试中，写作的文体有很多是议论文，而议论文的基本模式是摆事实、讲道理，讲道理就是说明原因。这种写作文体决定了表达原因结构的重要性。62l 英语中用来表达原因这一概念的结构有多种，我们可用as，because，since，seeing that，considering that，now that，not that(并不是说) 等词组来引导表示原因的从句。例如：l a. Now that we have seen these great achievements with our own eyes, we feel mo

46、re proud than ever of our country.l b. Professor Liu is strict with us because he wants us to make rapid progress.l c. Since we live near the sea, we enjoy a healthy climate.l d. Pollution is still a serous problem ,not that we dont have the ability to solve it, but that some people have not realize

47、d the consequences of the problem.63l 另外，还可以借助某些词语用简单句表达原因结构。例如：l a. The reason for this changes is quite obvious.l b. Diligence is the sky factor of success.l c. Idleness is the root of all evils.l d. He was ashamed to have made the mistake.(=He was ashamed that he had made the mistake.= He was ash

48、amed because he had made the mistake.)64l 除了上述的例句外，英语中还有很多或易或难的表达原因的结构。我们在进行写作训练的时候，不能满足一知半解，要讲究书面语言的正确性和准确性。比如，because是最常见的引导原因从句的连词，语气最强，表示直接的原因，若because置于句首，后面的主句不能再用so。用as引导的原因从句语气较弱，所说明的原因是附带的，而since表示的原因暗示着是稍加分析之后才能推断出来的原因。654.否定结构66l 4否定结构l 考生病句：l a. Some people think we neednt to worry about

49、 fresh water.l b. Nowadays many people dont like to go to the movies, too.67l 正确表达：l a. Some people think we neednt worry(或dont need to worry) about fresh water.l b. Nowadays many people dont like to go to the movies, either.68l 剖析：l 例句a的错误在于混淆了need作为情态动词和作为普通动词的用法。need作为情态动词时，主要用于否定句，后面的动词不带to，need

50、nt worry，作we的谓语。need作为实意动词时，可用于肯定句、否定句和疑问句，dont need to worry中的to worry作dont need的宾语。l 例句b的错误在于混淆了too和either的区别，这两个词都表示“也”的意思，但是在英语中too，also只能用于肯定句，而either只能用于否定句。l 否定结构除了在助动词、情态动词、be和have后面加not之外，还有许多不含not的否定结构。若能正确使用他们，文章会显得生动活泼，增加写作的闪光点。l 下面我们就来看看：69l 1)含有否定意义的词汇和短语l 以下列举的词和词组本身就具有否定的含义，因此无需用否定词。

51、l 介词：against，beyond，but except，withoutl 形容词和动词：absent，deny，differ，different，fail，free，ignore，miss，refuse，the last，used to, reluctant, lack, 70differ 英 dif l 不及物动词 vi. l 1.不同, 有异 Nylon and silk differ.l 尼龙与丝绸不同。l Tastes differ.l 嗜好各有不同。l The definition of a great job differs wildly from woman to woma

52、n.l 每个女人对一份好工作的定义都很不同。l 2.持异议 The two brothers differed about politics.l 这兄弟俩政见不同。71l 下面看以下例句：l a. Women fail to get the equal rights in some countries.在一些国家里妇女没有得到平等的权利。l b. this is by mo means the best way to solve the problem of energy crisis.这不是解决能源危机的最好办法。l c. We should protect trees from being

53、 destroyed.我们应保护树木，不让它们遭到破坏。l d. In old China we could not make a nail, let alone (make) machines.在旧中国，我们连一个钉子也造不了，更不用说制造机器了。72l 2)含有半否定意义的词语l barely，hardly，few，little，rarely，scarcely，seldom，not all，not everyone，not everything具有半否定的意义。l 例如：l a. We could hardly see any fresh vegetables in winter on m

54、arket several years ago.几年前在冬天市场上很难见到新鲜蔬菜。l b. These young people know little about how to choose good books to read.这些年轻人几乎不知道如何挑选优秀的书籍来读。73l barely 英 bli 美 brli 副词 adv. l 1.仅仅, 只不过, 几乎不 l We barely had time to catch the train.l 我们几乎来不及赶火车。l I had barely come in when the telephone rang.l 我刚进来, 电话就响了l The room is barely furnished.l 室内几乎没有陈设。74l 3)不含否定意义的否定结构l 有些词和词组形式上是否定结构，但其含义是肯定的，如：cannot but，cant help，no sooner than，notuntil，in no time，none other than，nothing but， 等等。例如：l a. We cant but face the reality.我们只有面对现实。l b. Thes