Filial Piety in Chinese and western cultures.doc

filial piety in chinese and western cultures 1 background information as we know，every culture has been formed through a very long and tortuous history period. because of its difference developed history, the cultures are various too. in deferent culture, the interpersonal relationship has great difference, especially between parents and children, which had been seriously influenced by the culture in different country.family is a vital social unit in any country, but its composition are various because of its different culture background in different country. it leads to people have different understanding for filial piety in different country.2 filial piety in both chinese and western cultures2.1 the composition of familyin traditional chinese family, extended family is a common thing. it means that three or four generations lived under one roof. people used to believe that the bigger the family, the better. each couple had many children and when they grew up, they still lived with their mother and father. even if they later got married, then childrens children continued having lots of babies and in the end the household grew very big. there are more and more family members and in some cases it was three or four generations under one roof. they all believed that a large family was blessed with good function and they didnt worry about anyone causing then any trouble. among the several generations, the oldest generation is the most important; their social position in the family is the highest. all important decisions have to be discussed with them. they are the oldest and they are also quite knowledgeable. it is obvious is cao xueqins a dream of red mansions; the mother of jia is the typical example.in extended family, the grandparents look after the children, he parents look after the grandparents and the children bring joys to their grandparents. chinese people often tell their children that they must show filial piety. what exactly does that mean? it means to obey ones parents, and not to upset them in any way. in a house where there are three or four generations under one roof children observer their parents showing filial piety towards the grandparents. as time goes by and they grew up, they too will know how to express their filial piety. as one generation learns from the last, everyone learns to become a filial person.the chinese regard the family as very important. if a member of the family does a good deed, the whole family will rejoice. it seems as if the entire family has done a good thing.modern chinese family dont have as many children as before, but many families still living together with three generations under one roof, actually, they want to be respectful of ones parents and look after them carefully.however, in western countries, nucleus family is dominant and most popular in their life. the children choose to leave their parents when they grow up, no matter weather they got married or not. sometimes, if the old parents live with their children, they would pay rent and board expense. having the sprits of independence is very important among the western countrys people. the old people would rather live in the old folks home, instead of living with his/her children. it can not be accepted in china. it shows those children are heartless and unfilial. it is those who let their parents live lonely in a very old age. among individual, family and union, family is less important than others in their heart.japanese culture has great similarity with chinese culture on this point. they think the old man have highest position in society. the young must pay respect for them. 2.2 “the filial piety” in a marriage.in traditional chinese, the defendance for parents is a prohibition. it is considered as an evil thing. even their marriages are totally arranged by parents. the children didnt have any choices or freedoms. when the wedding day is coming, after the bride was brought into the grooms family, the two will perform the marriage ceremony. witness by all the relations and friends, the bride and groom will worship the heaven and earth. then worship the grooms parents ang they will serve tea to all of their superiors in the family. the worship for parents shows the their position in peoples mind. in western country, they dont worship their parents. their marriage was held in church. they trust god. when the bride went into her husbands family, the first role of her is not a wife but a daughter-in-law. she must look after her parents-in-law and do obey them. there is another way that can reflect the different viewpoints between two cultures. if there is a fight between wife and mother, the husband must insist on a principle: mother is always right. and criticize his wife, most seriously, sometimes the wife must be abandoned just because of this point. this can never happen in western country. in their heart the husband-wife relationship is first important. the man would help his wife in a fight. and they think the parents have no rights to interrupt their life and impose the load to them.2.3 exemplify the cultural clashes.in tv play little students in aboard , a class, made up of different skin students, wants to perform a sketch about chinese traditional love story of liang shanbo and zhu yingtai. but a serious cultural clash exists. the american boy think zhu yingtais parents are devil. they present her daughter from getting married to liang shanbo. they just love money and political power, not considering her daughters feeling. so he thinks the heroine must hate them and try to use very rude word. but the chinese girl doesnt think so. she thinks it is every parents wishes to hope her daughter get married to a rich family and not worrying food and place to live. although zhu yingtai didnt agree with her parents idea to get married to another man she dont like, ma wencai, but she still love her parents. they give her life. so she can not say any impolite words to them.this is a typical example of cultural clash. this exists because of the existence of different culture background, values of wo