《夜莺与玫瑰》两个中文版本对比

（2013）届本科生毕业设计（论文）题 目 The Comparison Between Two Chinese Version of the Nightingale and the Rose In Translation Approaches The comparison of translation techniques between . 夜莺与玫瑰两个中文版本 翻译技巧之比较 专 业 英语 院 系 外国语学院 学 号 姓 名 指 导 教 师 2014年5月夜莺与玫瑰两个中文版本翻译技巧之比较学生姓名：指导教师： 摘 要：英国著名诗人、作家Oscar Wilde的童话一向辞藻丰丽、主题深刻，给人们以极大的震撼。夜莺与玫瑰因其唯美的风格和凄美的故事本身赢得了全球广大读者的青睐。由于译者的翻译观、翻译方法等总要受到一定的社会经济、文化条件的影响，对于同一篇文章难免会有不同的理解与表达。本文着重从翻译技巧的角度，简要比较了林徽因和王林的两个版本。全文分两章，分别对词汇和句子结构两方面的翻译技巧作了比较，旨在分享一些个人观点并争取更多的学者参与进来以期更全面、客观而又深刻的认识。 关键词：比较、夜莺与玫瑰、词汇、句子结构 The Comparison between Two Chinese Version of the Nightingale and the Rose In the Translation Approaches of the Text同上Undergraduate: Supervisor: Abstract: The famous English poet and writer Oscar Wildes fairy tales always give people great shocks for profound theme .Owing to its beautiful style and poignant story ,The nightingale and the rose wons the global readers of all ages.Translators translation methods always influenced by certain social economic and cultural conditions, for the same article different translators have different understanding and expressions.The thesis briefly compared the two versions of Phyllis Lin and wang Lin from the perspective of translation approaches . It consists of two chapters.The first chapter focuses on the comparison of vocabulary , The second chapter focuses on the comparison of sentence structure . The purpose is to share some personal views and strive for more scholars to participate in the study to make it a more comprehensive, objective and profound understanding. Key words: comparison;the Nightingale and Rose; vocabulary; sentence componentsContents论文的中心是比较翻译技巧，必须有翻译理论支持，举例子的目的是说明为什么同样的原因在不同的版本中使用了不同的翻译技巧而导致不同的译文，出于什么目的翻译？例子不需要很多，但要能说明问题，整篇论文从这角度去思考修改，论文的重点是翻译技巧，提纲要从翻译策略的角度展开1. Introduction12. Chapter One:The comparison on vocabulary12.1 The choice and conversion of word meaning22.2 The conversion of parts of speech22.3 Addition and Omission33. Chapter Two:The comparison on sentence structure43.1 Word Order4 3.1.1 Direct translation and reverse translation4 3.1.2 preposition and Postposition5 3.1.3Inductive method.63.2 Combination6 3.2.1 Division6 3.2.2 Combination73.3 Conversion8 3.3.1 Transformation of parts of the sentence8 3.3.2 The change of the passive voice94.Conclusion95.Bibliography 106.Acknowledgment .131. Introduction Fairy tale is a narrative style based on fantasy and assisted with exaggeration, personification, etc. to express universal human desire.The famous English poet and writer Oscar Wilde is an aestheticism advocates, the beautiful characters and delicate feelings in his fairy tale often give a person with a sweet touch and a kind of light sadness. The nightingale and the rose won the global readers of all ages because of its beautiful style and poignant story itself . “The nightingale and the rose is a story beautiful but sad : a young man wanted to dance with his beloved girl very much, and the girl agreed him that as long as he bring her a red rose, she would be his dancing partner. He did not find even one red rose after searching all his garden,and his heart was almost broken.In order to realize his dream ,the little nightingale sacrificed his life to exchange a red rose. But the young man and the red rose were cruel refused by the girl as She had accepted many beautiful jewelries that ministers nephew send to her. Finally , the young student cast the red rose on the road, let the wheel roll on it.However, different translators have different understanding on things, which leads to different expressions on same things. Since it being translated into Chinese by Hu Yuzhi in 1920 ,The nightingale and the rose has been translated by other scholars many times.This article mainly focuses on the analysis and contrast of two different versions from Phyllis Lin,an outstanding women living in Republican period and Wang Lin,an associate professor teaching in Foshan University.Generally speaking, both Lin and Wangs translation are full of characteristics of beautiful tone.They all strive to make their translation faithfully on meaning and smooth on expression .Its a time with collision between old culture and new culture when Phyllis Lin translated the nightingale and the rose after colloquialism emerged . As a result ,her translation is influenced strongly by classical Chinese translation.While when Mr Wang Lin translated the nightingale and the rose, classical Chinese has been away for a long time .With the development of Times, Wangs expression is more inclined to todays style. The main purpose of this thesis is to compare the approaches of these two versions on the similarities and differences, and to share some personal views .2. Chapter One:The comparison on vocabulary In E-C translation, different translators have different ways to express vocabularies .Influenced by their times and the society they live ,they often have different understanding on meanings ,which makes a different output .2.1 The choice and conversion of word meaning2.1.1 The choice of word meaning Most English vocabularies are multivocal, we need to choose the right meaning when we translate. As a result of living in different times, Phyllis Lin and Wang Lin have different social environment and language background, which leads to a different choose on words .And this is an outstanding difference between the two versions .Overall , Lin chooses more classical Chinese than Wang when they translate the Nightingale and the Rose.While Wang chooses more colloquialism, Which makes an easier understanding as it is closer to our modern life.Here are some examples:Eg.1 “his beautiful eyes filled with tears”.(in Para.3)According to Lin:他秀眼里含满着泪珠。According to Wang:一双美丽的眼睛充满了泪水。Compared “秀眼”and “美丽的眼睛”，“秀眼” is a word with classical Chinese style.Eg.2 “I have read all that the wise men written .”(in Para.3)According to Lin:古圣贤书我已读完。According to Wang:我读过智者们所写的所有文章。For “wise man” ,Lin chooses the classical Chinese “古圣贤”while Wang chooses the word “智者” .Eg.3 “play upon their stringed instruments”.(in Para.7)According to Lin:弹弄丝竹。According to Wang:弹奏起他们的弦乐器。About “stringed instruments” ,Lin translate it as “丝竹”(means traditional stringed and woodwind instrument,a classical Chinese word to indicate music)Also there are many other examples as follows:Lightly ,gay dresses(in Para.7),nippled(in Para.26),wings(in Para.32),very fond of(in Para.36),lonely(in Para.37), Lin translates them into:翩翩，华服，噬伤，双翼，极爱怜，寂寥,and these words are full of traditional Chinese style. From the comparison, we can see that influenced by different social economic and cultural conditions, different translators have different chooses on word meaning, Compared these two different versions, we can see two kinds of translation styles. To Lins translation, selection of classical Chinese makes the article full of traditional aesthetic feeling. However, it also sacrifices some features of the original at the same time. Wangs choice on word meaning is relatively straightforward and simple, but it is closer to the facts described in the original.2.1.2 The conversion of word meaning When translating, we can translate the words and sentences by stretch out their meanings in Chinese habit on the basis of understanding the original meaning of English vocabulary. In these two versions, both Lin and Wang have embodied the conversion of word meaning.But relatively speaking, both Phyllis Lin and Wang Lin choose different treatments on different sentences.Such as these examples :Eg1.“give you what you want” Lin: 应你所求 Wang:满足你的需要 In this sentence,for the word “want”,Lin translates it as “ask”(请求),while Wang translate it as “need”（需要）.Eg.2 “But passion has made his face like pale ivory.”(in para.4) Lin: 但挚情已使他脸色憔悴。 Wang: 但是感情的折磨使他脸色苍白如象牙。 In this sentence, Lin choose the way to stretch out the meaning of “made his face like pale ivory”, but Wang translates it as it is.Eg.3 She has form. (P40) Lin：那夜莺的确有些姿态 Wang:她的样子真好看 In this sentence ,for the word “form”,Lin translate it as “姿态”(means gesture),however Wang translate it as “good looks”Eg.4 “and a fierce pang of pain shot through her.”(P47) Lin: 但是，一种奇痛穿过她的全身 Wang: 一种剧烈的痛楚袭遍了她的全身 In this part, Lin translates the word “and” into “but”,the word “fierce”into “strange”.Eg5.“Life is dear to all.” Lin谁的生命不是宝贵的 Wang生命对每一个人都是宝贵的Eg6.“and everybody knows that the arts are selfish.” Lin：谁不知道艺术是为自己的 Wang：人人都知道艺术是自私的Eg7 “Death is a great price to pay for a red rose.” (P31) Lin:拿死来买一朵红玫瑰，代价真不小 Wang:拿死亡来换一朵玫瑰，这代价实在很高 In these sentences,Wang Lin translates them as their original meanings , but Phyllis Lin chooses to translate on the contrary . Of course ,there is still example in which Wang Lin choose to translate in the opposite way.Such us example 8:Eg8.Still, it must be admitted that she has some beautiful notes in her voice. Lin: 我们是须承认她有醉人的歌喉 Wang:我们不得不承认她的歌声中有些美丽的调子 In this sentence,Lin translate the meaning according to the meaning of the original,but Wang Lin does not.2.2、The conversion of word classIn general,there often be more nouns in English. As a result,there are so many nouns,predicative verbs and gerunds converted by verbs. We can translate these words into verbs when we translate .In the translation of the the nightingale and the rose ,although Phyllis Lin and Wang Lin have adapted this method ,its reflected more in Phyllis Lins version. Eg1 .“for want of a red rose”( in para. 3) Lin: 求一朵红玫瑰不得，我的生活使这样难堪。 Wang：缺少一朵红玫瑰，我却要过痛苦的生活。In this sentence,“want” is a nouns. But they translate it as a verb. Eg2 “It is pleasant to ”(in Para.31) Lin: 一件乐事 Wang: 一件令人愉快的事情Both of Phyllis Lin and Wang Lin translate “pleasant” ,an adjectives. As a noun. Eg3 “But the oak trees understood.”(in Para.36) Lin: 但橡树却是懂得 Wang:但橡树心里是明白的 In this sentence,the word “understood”is a verb, but they translate it as an adjective.2.3 Addition and Omission Sometimes in E-C translation, the original has a certain meaning but not expressed in words directly.Addition refers to add these meanings when in translation .For example,no quantifier between numerals and nouns in English,but we often add some quantifier when we translate. However ,sometimes we choose the method of omission when in translation as long as the output does no effect on the complete of the meaning. For example, Possessive pronouns are used in grate quantities in English but relatively less in Chinese.Examples about addition:Eg1 He is weeping for a red rose, said the Nightingale. 11Lin :夜莺说“他为着一朵红玫瑰哭泣.Wang: “他为一朵红玫瑰而哭泣，”夜莺告诉大家.Wang adds an indirect object in this sentence .Eg2.But go to my brother who grows beneath the Students window22Lin :请你到那边青年窗下找我兄弟Wang: 但你可以去找我那长在学生窗下的兄弟Both of them add the subject “you”.Eg3.But the Oak-tree understood, and felt sad,36Lin :那橡树却是懂得，他觉得悲伤Wang: 可是橡树心里是明白的，他感到很难受Both of them add the subject “he”.Eg4.and her life-blood ebbed away from her.41Lin :她生命的血液渐渐溢去Wang: 她身上的鲜血也快要流光了Lin adds an adverbial for the sentence ,and Wang adds a complement.Examples about Omission:Eg1.and her life-blood ebbed away from her.41Lin :她生命的血液渐渐溢去Wang: 她身上的鲜血也快要流光了Both Lin and Wang omit the translation of “from her”.Eg2.and woke the sleeping shepherds from their dreams.50Lin :将牧童从梦里惊醒Wang: 把酣睡的牧童从梦乡中唤醒 Lin omits an attributive “sleeping”.Eg3.Why, I dont believe you have even got silver buckles to your shoes as the Chamberlains nephew has60Lin :我看像大臣侄子鞋上的那银扣，你都没有Wang: 啊，我敢说你不会像宫廷大臣侄儿那样，鞋上钉有银扣子Lin omits the translation of modal particle “why”.3 Chapter Two:The comparison on sentence structure3.1 word order 3.1.1 Direct translation and reverse translation In English,time adverbial can be in different places in a sentence. Besides,some attributive clause,adverbial clause that indicate conditions,suggestions,and so on can be put in different places flexibly. However ,things are of some difference in Chinese. People often tend to express things in time or logical order in Chinese.Therefore,either direct translation or inverse translation is consistent with the habits of Chinese. On this part,Phyllis Lin uses inverse translation more than Wang Lin ,which makes her translation in line with the reading habits of target readers(who lived in the Republican period) . Here are some examples:Eg1.She said that she would dance with me if I brought her red roses,Lin :她说我若为她采得红玫瑰，便与我跳舞Wang: 她说过只要我送给她一些红玫瑰，她就愿意与我跳舞Eg2.you must build it out of music by moonlightLin :你需在月色里用音乐制成Wang: 你就必须借助月光用音乐来造出它Eg3.for Love is wiser than Philosophy, though she is wise, and mightier than Power, though he is mighty.(in Para.34)Lin :因为哲理虽智，爱比她更慧，权力虽雄，爱比她更伟Wang:因为尽管哲学很聪明，然而爱情比她更聪明，尽管权力很伟大，可是爱情比他更伟大 Eg4Life is very dear to all.31Lin:谁的生命不是宝贵的Wang:生命对每一个人都是非常宝贵的 3.1.2Preposition and Postposition Due to the different language habits in English and Chinese, when we translate some short restrictive attributive clauses and table identity of appositive , we can take them to the front of the antecedent (center). At this point, Phyllis Lin and Wang Lin applied much.Eg1.and the courtiers in their gay dresses will throng round her6Lin :华服的少年们就会艳羡的围着她Wang: 那些身着华丽服装的臣仆们将她围在中间Eg2.as yellow as the hair of the mermaiden who sits upon an amber throne, and yellower than the daffodil that blooms in the meadow before the mower comes with his scythe. But go to my brother who grows beneath the Students window22Lin :黄如琥珀座上人鱼神的头发，黄过割草人未割以前的金水仙。请你到那边青年窗下找我兄弟，或者他能应你所求Wang: 黄得就像坐在琥珀宝座上的美人鱼的头发，黄得超过拿着镰刀的割草人来之前在草地上盛开的水仙花。但你可以去找我那长在学生窗下的兄弟，或许他能满足你的需要Eg3.Sweet is the scent of the hawthorn, and sweet are the bluebells that hide in the valley, and the heather that blows on the hill31Lin :坐在青郁的森林里，看太阳在黄金车里，月亮在白珠辇内驰骋，真是一桩乐事。山楂花的味儿真香，山谷里的吊钟花和山坡上野草真美Wang: 坐在绿树上看太阳驾驶着她的金马车，看月亮开着她的珍珠马车，是一件愉快的事情。山楂散发出香味，躲藏在山谷中的风铃草以及盛开在山头的石南花也是香的。Eg4.As the shadow of a rose in a mirror of silver, as the shadow of a rose in a water-pool, so was the rose that blossomed on the top-most spray of the Tree.Lin :起先那瓣儿是黯淡的如同河上罩着的薄雾-黯淡的如同晨曦的交际，银灰的好似曙光的翅翼，那枝上玫瑰蕾就像映在银镜里的玫瑰影子或是照在池塘的玫瑰化身Wang: 起初，花儿是乳白色的，就像悬在河上的雾霾白得就如同早晨的足履，白得就像黎明的翅膀。在最高枝头上盛开的那朵玫瑰花，如同一朵在银镜中，在水池里照出的玫瑰花影。 3.1.3Inductive method When translate some long sentences,translators need to recombination the words to make it easier for understanding.Eg1Night after night have I sung of him, though I knew him not: night after night have I told his story to the stars, and now I see him. (in Para.4)Lin :以前我虽不曾认识，我却夜夜的歌唱他：我夜夜将他的一桩桩事告诉星辰，如今我见着他了.Wang: 虽然我不认识他，但我会每夜每夜地为他歌唱，我还会每夜每夜地把他的故事讲给星星听。现在我总算看见他了，In this sentence ,Wang Lin recombine the sentence. Eg2.Why is he weeping? asked a little Green Lizard, as he ran past him with his tail in the air.(in Para.8)Lin :绿色的小壁虎说，“他为什么哭泣？”说完就竖起尾巴从他跟前跑过Wang: “他为什么哭呢?”一条绿色的小蜥蜴高高地翘起尾巴从他身旁跑过时，这样问道。 Eg3.The young Student was still lying on the grass, where she had left him, and the tears were not yet dry in his beautiful eyes.33Lin : 那青年仍旧僵卧在草地上方才她离去的地方，他那付秀眼里的泪珠还没有干.Wang: 年轻的学生仍躺在草地上，跟她离开时的情景一样，他那双美丽的眼睛还挂着泪水.In this sentence,Phyllis Lin combine the former part with the later part . Eg4.So he returned to his room and pulled out a great dusty book, and began to read.62Lin :于是他回到房中取出一本笨重的，满堆着尘土的大书埋头细读.Wang: 于是他想便回到自己的屋子里，拿出满是尘土的大书，读了起来.In this sentence,Wang Lin separates the former parts into two,while Phyllis Lin combine the former part with the later part .3.2 combination 3.2.Division Because of the link by contact word , although some sentence is a sentence in form, but the meaning of many components in it are independent of each other.It is entirely feasible to disconnect them into short sentences.We can disconnect the sentence at these links.The contact word usually bear by relationship pronouns,relationship adverbs, independent verbs, etc. From the comparison ,we can see that Phyllis Lin likes to divide one sentence into several parts while Wang Lin tends to translate as one. Eg1.And when the Moon shone in the heavens（in Para.41）Lin :待月亮升到天空，放出她的光艳时Wang: 等到月亮挂上了天际的时候 Eg2.You will wear it tonight next your heart, and as we dance together it will tell you how I love you.(in Para.56)Lin :你可以将她插在你的胸前，我们同舞的时候，这花便能告诉你，我怎样的爱你. Wang: 你今晚就把它戴在你的胸口上，我们一起跳舞的时候，它会告诉你我是多么的爱你.In these two sentences,Lin divides both of them into two parts. 3.2.2Combination Sometimes we can joint two sentences or more into one as long as they have close meanings . In the translation of the Nightingale And the Rose ,both Phyllis Lin and Wang Lin adapt this method .Eg1.The Student looked up from the grass, and listened(in Para.35)Lin :青年从草里抬头侧耳静听Wang:学生从草地上抬头仰望着，并侧耳倾听 This sentence has two parts,but Lin joints them into a short one. Eg2.When she had finished her song the Student got up, and pulled a note-book and a lead-pencil out of his pocket.(in Para.39)Lin :她唱罢时，那青年站起身来从衣袋里抽出一本日记薄和一支笔Wang:等她的歌声一停，学生便从草地上站起来，从他的口袋中拿出一个笔记本和一支铅笔。This sentence has ,Lin joints “the Student got up, and pulled a note-book and a lead-pencil out of his pocket”into one short part. Wang Lin also apply