商务英译汉赏析79页.doc

(1)我们希望指出,这里市场竞争激烈,要想成功地销售出去,你方报价须具有吸引力,否则将有困难. 例如, 可以认为, 指出的原因在于竞争,当然也可以表现为竞争的逻辑结论是指出,这样这个句子至少有两种英译形式.1)We would like to point out that because of the harsh / fierce competition in our market your quotation must be attractive to the buyers at our end before we could sell successfully your products here.2) Fierce competition in the local market here means that, it seems obvious to us, it would be difficult for us to promote successfully the sale of your products if your quotation is not attractive to our end-users here.如果五个句子综合考虑,可以变换角度译为:We would like to point out that your quotation has to be attractive to the buyers here, otherwise it would be difficult for us to sell your products in this competitive market.市场竞争激烈: fierce / harsh / competitive market(2)如果你方的价格做得开的话,我们相信能成大生意.像价格做得开和能成大生意,这类熟语,与别的信函中可能出现的专业性比较强的术语一样,在商务英语中都可以做适当的淡化处理. 也就是说,无论汉语原文是专业色彩较浓的,还是相对口语化的,用于信函往来的译文都可以使用一般化的句型和词汇,只要说清楚事情就行,不必追求风格上的一致.a.If your prices are in line, we trust important business can materialize.b,If your prices are attractive, we believe we can make big business.英文站点:Financing Local Roads Construction:Small Markets Make Big Business. 3)很高兴收到你方8月25日询价,根据你方要求,今寄上有插图的目录和明细价目单. a.处理为一大一小两个简单句We were very pleased to receive your inquiry of August 25 and enclose our illustrated catalogue and the detailed price-list as you asked.b,处理为两个句子. We are very pleased to receive your inquiry of August 25. We were very pleased to have received your inquiry of August 25. I am pleased to enclose our illustrated catalogue and the price-list for your reference.We are pleased to enclose our illustrated catalogue and the price-list for your reference.For your information we are sending you a copy of our illustrated catalogue and price-list.We have enclosed our illustrated catalogue and a copy of the detailed price-list for you.Our illustrated catalogue and price-list are enclosed for your reference.Enclosed for your information are our illustrated catalogue and the detailed price-list as you asked.C,把对方you作为译文的主语,这种着眼符合国际信函中比较受重视的you attitude,值得提倡.这样需要改变谓语用语,也就是由寄改为收.Enclosed please find our illustrated catalogue and the detailed price-list as you asked.You will find in the attachment our illustrated catalogue and the detailed price-list you asked for.Would you please check and find our illustrated catalogue and the detailed price-list enclosed.D,译文主语为目录.以物为主语在英语中远比汉语中用的多.The illustrated catalogue and the detailed price-list you asked for have been enclosed.Two copies of our illustrated catalogue and price-list , which you asked for, have been enclosed for your infomation.4) 根据你方要求可译为: in accordance with your request 或 as per your requirement但不宜译为: according to your demand.前两种译法是对的,但显得有些公事公办容易产生距离感,因此不如译为:as you asked / as required / as requested 达意即可.5) 我方可保证收到订单后两周内交货.解析: 如果交货定义很明确,而且与客户的贸易条款已商量妥当,可译为:We guarantee to deliver the goods within fourteen days of receipt of your oder.但如果交货定义不明,贸易条款尚未商量妥当时,建议不要落实译为deliver the goods, 可以采用effect shipment 为好, 为了淡化或者中和汉语原文中的可保证,而不把话说死,以免被动,可译为:We would try to effect shipment in fourteen days of the receipt of your order.因此,在商贸信函中,汉英表达不必要求句法与词上的一一对应,关键是把事情说清楚,更有效地为促成贸易而服务.6), 寄上 / 邮寄 / 附寄 / 随信附上 / 随函附上一份这些汉语说法,可以译为下列方式之一. 与其他公文套语一样,这里的关键不是字字对应的翻译, 而是具体语境下的语义等值enclose ( v )Enclosed is a copy of .We enclose a copy of .Enclosed please find a copy of.7) 日期表达汉语,英国英语,美国英语有些区别,各自有相对固定的格式. 下列为国际商务信函中比较通行的正确表达方式.请注意词序,词间空格,基数词和序数词及逗号的应用:18 August, 2004 August 18, 200418th August 2004Tuesday, August 18, 2004在比较正式的商务信函中,虽然有些外国客户也采用下列其中之一,但以下七种表述都不对,不好,不准确:5/4/05; 3-26/03; 4/7/2005; 11-6-04; 8.8.2004; Sep.14,2003; Dec.12/04因此我们给外国业务伙伴写信时,同一日期中的年月日次序,应当尽量考虑到收信人的背景,如果是英国人或英联邦国家的,可按英国式的日,月,年排列,(18 August, 2004 ) ;如果是美国公司或背景不是很清楚的,可按美国式的月,日,年词序排列( 如: August 18, 2004)(8) 我方产品质量上乘,价格合理.a. Our products / goods are both excellent in quality and reasonable in price.(原汁原味,活用介词in,非常地道的英文表达)b,质量上乘 high quality, super quality, reliable quality, excellent quality, superior in quality.c, 价格合理 reasonable price; rational price; moderate price; competitive price; street price; right price etc.(9) 询盘:Heavy enquiries witness the quality of our products.大量询盘证明我们产品质量过硬As soon as the price picks up, enquiries will revive.一旦价格回升，询盘将恢复活跃。Enquiries for carpets are getting more numerous. 对地毯的询盘日益增加。 Enquiries are so large that we can only than allot you 200 cases. 询盘如此之多，我们只能分给你们200箱货。 Enquiries are dwindling. 询盘正在减少。 Generally speaking, inquiries are made by the buyers. 询盘一般由买方发出。 Mr. Baker is sent to Beijing to make an inquiry at China National Textiles Corporation. 贝克先生来北京向中国纺织公司进行询价。 We regret that the goods you inquire about are not available. 很遗憾，你们所询的货物现在无货。 To make an inquiry about our oranges, a representative of the Japanese company paid us a visit. 为了对我们的橙子询价，那家日本公司的一名代表访问了我们。 We cannot take care of your enquiry at present. 我们现在无力顾及你方的询盘。 Your enquiry is too vague to enable us to reply you. 你们的询盘不明确，我们无法答复。 Now that weve already made an inquiry about your articles, will you please reply as soon as possible? 既然我们已经对你们产品询价，可否尽快给予答复？ In the import and export business, we often make inquiries at foreign suppliers. 在进出口交易中，我们常向外商询价。 Can you give me an indication of price?你能给我一个估价吗？ Please let us know your lowest possible prices for the relevant goods. 请告知你们有关商品的最低价。 If your prices are favorable, I can place the order right away. 如果你们的价格优惠，我们可以马上订货。 When can I have your firm C.I.F. prices, Mr. Li? 李先生，什么时候能得到你们到岸价的实盘？Wed like to know what you can offer as well as your sales conditions. 我们想了解你们能供应什么，以及你们的销售条件。 How long does it usually take you to make delivery? 你们通常要多久才能交货？ Could you make prompt delivery? 可以即期交货吗？ Would you accept delivery spread over a period of time?不知你们能不能接受在一段时间里分批交货？10), 最近市场上对钢管需求量很大,因此我方对此实盘不能保留太久.最近市场上对钢管需求量很大 :a. There has been a great / big / active demand for steel tubes in the market; b, The demand for steel tubes has been great in the market. c, Steel tubes have been in great / big / active demand in the market. d, Steel tubes are very much in demand in the market.仔细品味这四种表达法,英语多用小词(如介词)的特点一目了然.因此我方对此实盘不能保留太久.a,Therefore we cant keep this offer open too long.b, It is therefore impossible for us to keep this offer open too long. (推荐使用)从意思表达完整的角度,两种译法皆可,但从英语的表达习惯角度而言,b显然更为可取.(11)需求大则必然会造成涨价,这一点希望引起你方注意,同时请你们早日作答.从前的译文: Active demand will certainly result in increased price, to which we hope you will pay attention. Meanwhile , we expect your early reply.在语法与语义的完整性上都无懈可击,但在语气上居高临下,含有教训人的口气,读者自然不悦.如果着眼于促成生意的目的,可以略去不说注意.a. As you are aware that big / active / great demand in the market will lead to price hikes, we look forward to your early orders.b,Probably you have noticed that strong market demand for steel tubes , and an early order will benefit both of us.(从对方的角度展开,以期达到benefit both of us ( 双赢-win-win),对方一看感觉挺爽,一不小心下了很大一笔单,Cool)c,Active demand will certainly result in increased price, and for this reason we expect your early reply.(for this reason,从价格上涨角度出发,替对方考虑,言下之意为快点下单,这就是狡猾得不露痕迹,外贸英语就要写得让客户不知不觉中按照我们的意图去做,而且还很高兴的样子)(12) 我们没有最低起订量的限制，你可以订几台甚至可以只订一台机器。Theres no minimum quantity, so you can order just a few or even just one machine. The price depends on quantity. 价格依数量而定.13)尊敬的次长阁下:非常欢迎您莅临我公司，我谨代表xxx有限公司感谢贵国的朋友来临指导对于我们来说能和您见面是一种荣誉，非常期待您的再次光临和指导再致以您我最深切的感谢！Dear Mr Parliamentary Secretary,Welcome to our company.It would be an honor to have you here today.On behalf of all the staff of xxx Co., Ltd, I would like to extend my sincere thanks to you and all the distinguished guests.We feel so honored to meet you here.We are hoping we can meet you once again. Thank you very much.14) 拳头产品; 龙头产品; 尖端产品拳头产品 : Competitive products ; knock-out products; blockbuster products.龙头产品: core products ; flagship products; mainstay products尖端产品: highly sophisticated products(15) 请给我们报拉格斯到岸价.English: a,Please quote ( us) your lowest price CIF Lagos b,Please let us have your lowest price CIF Lagos.赏析: quote 后面经常接price,有时会把price省去.如: Please quote us for walnuts CIF Lagos.实际上省略了your lowest price 这三个词.(16)按照要求,我报盘100辆凤凰牌自行车如下:English: As requested, we offer (are offering) you 100 pieces hoenix Brand Bicycles as follows:赏析: 按照要求(请求),as requested,常用的状语,可以理解是由 as it is requested 简化而来,有时用 as per your request,意义相近.offer报盘(包括货名,规格,数量,价格,船期及答复期限等).在make offer,send offer, give offer,cable offer后通常接介词for间或接on. 如:Please make(send,cable) us an offer for walnuts.(核桃)Buyers are anxious to get an offer for walnuts.如说:你们已报某货的盘或某数量的盘通常用介词of:We are working on your offer of 2,000 kilos black tea.Your offer of wood oil is too high.(17)上述报盘以我方最后确认为准.译文: The above offer is subject to our final confirmation赏析:subject to 以.为条件(为准)以你方答复于3月28日前到达这里为准.Subject to your reply reaching here before March 28.以你方立即接受为条件.Subject to your immediate acceptance.在外贸业务中,所谓立即接受,大约给三天时间,为了避免误解,还是指明确切日子为好.18) 我的电脑不幸遭遇特洛伊木马病毒,使用木马防线查杀却无济于事.痛苦!译文: Unfortunately, my PC infects Trojan Horse Virus.I use Anti Ghostbuster to scan the computer and try to remove Trojan but it doesnt work well.It really sucks.此乃本人实情,所以在这个板块这个专题插入一段题外话,而且昨天正式从软件公司辞职了,从今天开始我就和福步的兄弟姐妹们共进退,同在外贸的这片蓝天下痛苦又勇敢地生存并发展,so I wanna say I come, I conquer .(19) 结果如下.译文: The results are as follows:解析: as follows = as what follows 是习语, as 是关系代词,不论句子的主语是单数还是复数只可用as follows 不可用as follow.如:Our prices are as follows:Our price is as follows:该习语作状语时也是一样.(20) 牛市 / Bull market赏析: bull 在股票市场，“牛市”（bull market）是上涨的行情，“熊市”（bear market）是下跌的行情。stockbroker是指股票投资者。sell the bears skin before he had caught the bear指卖空（buy short），在俚语中，sell a bear也同样指卖空。另外，在股市以外，牛和熊也有含义：英国人自称为“约翰牛”（John Bull），美国男篮也有大名鼎鼎的“芝加哥公牛队”（Chicago Bulls），bull指“粗壮的人，卤莽得人，凶猛的人”，a bull in a china shop指“说话或行动卤莽的人，笨手笨脚动辄闯祸的人”，shoot the bull指“吹牛皮”，a bear for hard work指“能吃苦耐劳的人”。 谈完牛(bull)之后,我们来体会与外贸密切相关的市场(market)的用法.Market:行市下跌: Market is declining.行市上涨: Market is advancing.行市十分坚挺(迅速,持续上涨) Market is strong.行市坚挺(行市有上涨表现) Market is firm.行市疲软 (行市有下跌趋势) Market is weak.市场活跃 Market is brisk (active).(21) 新电脑游戏将于六月在台问世.译文: The new computer game will hit the market in Taiwan this June.hit the market 上市The new product will hit the market next week.新产品将于下周上市.November is the season for this commodity in our market在我们那儿十一月是这个商品上市季节.We readjust our price according to the international market. 我们是根据世界市场的行情来调整价格的。(22)自我产品介绍时几句非常有用的话Our quality is far beyond comparison.我们的质量是无与伦比的Our product has won / gained great popularity in the market 我们的产品在市场上大受欢迎。 Quality is something we never neglect. Good quality ensures continued sales. 我们一直十分重视质量。商品质量好，才能不断有销路。23)将价格英语进行到底If your price is favorable, we can book an order right away. 如果你方价格优惠，我们可以马上订货。 We may reconsider our price if your order is big enough. 如果你方订货数量大，价格我们还可以考虑。 All these articles are our best selling lines. 这些产品都是我们的畅销货。 These patterns are relatively popular in the international market. 这些产品的花色是目前国际市场上比较流行的。 It is difficult for us to sell the goods, as your price is so high. 你们的价格那么高，我们很难以这个价格销售。 It would be very difficult for us to push any sales if we buy it at this price. 如果按这个价格买进，我方实在难以推销。 Your price is 25% higher than that of last year. 你方的价格比去年高出了百分之二十五（25%）。 You may notice that the price for this commodity has gone up since last year. 您知道从去年以来这种商品的价格上涨了。 You know, the price for this commodity has gone up a lot in the last few months. 您知道，几个月来这种商品的价格上涨得很多。 The price for this commodity is US$25 per pound in the international market. 这种商品国际市场的价格是每磅二十五（25）美元。 Our price is reasonable as compared with that in the international market. 我们的价格和国际市场的价格相比还是合理的。 Im afraid I dont agree with you there. 我不同意您的说法。 Your price is higher than those we got from elsewhere. 你们的价格比我们从别处得到的报价要高。 The Japanese quotation is lower. 日本的报价就比较低。 You should take quality into consideration. 您必须要考虑到质量问题。（24） 你方6月7日来信收到，谢谢，对此我们已于昨天电复。分析： 汉语的时态不如英语那么细腻。“我们已于”在译成英语时应注意。有人会根据“已”字采用完成时态，但请注意该句含有时间状语“昨天”，因此应当使用过去时态。Thank you for your letter of June 7， and we sent you a reply by mail yesterday。（不用 have sent）。25)从我们的电子邮件中你方谅必知道，我们能够报实盘6辆卡丁车成本，保险费加运费温哥华每辆300美金，在收到你方订单后20天内交货。货款支付方式为即期信用证支付。该报盘以你方答复在一星期内到达此地为有效。分析：完整陈述我方实盘内容，同时加上“该报盘以你方答复在一星期内到达此地为有效.之类的限制条件，稍稍给对方一点速下定决心的压力。这些都是实务信函中常见的固定表达。You must have noted from our mail that we can make you a firm offer on 6 Go-karts at USD300 per piece CIF Vancouver. Delivery can be made within 20 days upon the arrival of your order, and payment is to be by sight letter of credit. This offer is subject to your reply reaching here within one week.此盘中信息准确，含有CIF价，货物数量，装运期限，付款方式，是较为professional的。 (27) 在众多的即时通讯的软件中，我们大多数习惯于hotmail MSN的即时信息功能，但由于MSN与微软的某些操作系统并不兼容，所以有时通话效果和音质并不理想，相反，一款叫做Skype的软件则脱颖而出，成为voice chat software 的佼佼者。在这里，特地向从事外贸工作的朋友推荐Skype软件，可从站点下载，注册安装使用，非常方便。We have got used to Hotmail Messenger ( MSN for short) for instant messaging and voice chat among a variety of messaging softwares such as MSN, Yahoo, Tecent Messenger, Etang MSN etc. We prefer hotmail MSN.However sometimes MSN isnt completely compatiable with the Microsoft Windows System ( Such as XP or sth like that), so MSN doesnt work well as expected in voice dcommunication. The voice quality isnt so good. A software called Skype stands out.And it has been the first choice of users because of its high-quality voice.So, hereby, I , in particular, recommend the software, Skype for instant communication ( Voice), which is of great help for the friends who are involved in foreign trade.If you wanna use it, pls go to to download, register and install , and then use it.I hope we can talk through Skype.Good luck.28) 敦促开立信用证先生：事由：我方第WE136售货确认书关于我方第WE136售货确认书项下三百辆卡丁车，拟提请注意交货日期日益迫近，但至今未收到相关信用证。请速开立信用证，以便我方顺利执行这项订单。为了避免随后的修改，务请注意信用证的规定事项与合同条款完全一致。盼佳音。此致分析：对方已经订货但尚未付款；我方已经备货可又未收汇。即使把事情简化到极端也能发现：倘若此时对方撤单，我方净亏势必大于对方。正是基于这么一个简单的道理，商务信函写作中，在这种情况下，一定要注意论述的角度和下笔的语气，应当提出解决方案而不要争论谁是谁非，应当小心赔笑而不能咄咄逼人，应当点到辄止而不必过多理论。事由：subject line / subject / Subj. / Reference / Re./ Caption如果事由一项已用上述方式表达清楚，则第一段第一句译文可简化为：With reference to the above-mentioned contract, we would like to.Referring to the captioned goods, we would like to have your attention to.完整译文：Dear sirs, Re: Our Sales Confirmation No. WE-136 With reference to the 300 Go-karts under our Sales Confirmation No.WE-136, we would draw your attention to the fact that the date of delivery is approaching but we have not yet received your covering Letter of Credit. Please try our best to establish the L/C, so that we can process your order in good time. In order to avoid subsequent amendments, please see to it that the L/C stipulations are in exact accordance with the terms of the contract. We hope to receive your favourable news soon.Yours truly,Young Tu用词解析：1）拟提请注意 ： would like to （拟） or would draw sbs attention to / have sbs attention to （使用介词to）2）日益迫近 is approaching （现在进行时态体现惟妙惟肖）approach是个好词，可以借鉴使用。3）请速开立信用证 Please try our best to establish the L/C。本来是要对方如何如何，但用个our表明是我们共同的事情，让对方感觉很好，能够统一立场，而不是咄咄逼人，对方易接受，这种写法值得借鉴。29) 我们很乐意地通知你方，你方5月28日所定购的货物，已经于6月16日交由“Evergreen”货轮自宁波北仑港运出。译:We are pleased to inform you that the goods you ordered on May 28 were loaded onto S.S.Evergreen on June 16, which was to depart from Beilun Port, Ningbo, Zhejiang.已经于6月16日交由“Evergreen”货轮自宁波北仑港运出。这个分句，在汉语中称为连动句式，英语译文应根据逻辑关系表现出各个动词的语法作用。交由不应译为Given。汉译英中，字面上的对应并不总是含义上的对等，实际业务中的货物交割也并不是一给了之。译文应当着眼于实际动作，即“装运上船”而“运出”实际上是指船离开北仑港，其逻辑主语是“船”，安排成一个从句正好化解这个连动结构。表示“货船”或“货轮”的英语单词，在商务书信中常用的有cargo liner,cargo ship,cargo vessel, freighter, freight ship,motor ship,steamer,tramp steamer, vessel等。常使用英语缩写形式。“货轮”的标记可以是S.S或s.s或SS或S/S都是steamship的缩写。有时使用MS或M.S表示，意为“Motor Ship”指内燃机船或柴油机船，也可各类现代化的货轮。关于船名的表达，需要注意五点。a，如果是外籍船舶，沿用外语原名，如 S.S. “Fortune”，不易译成“幸福”、“财富”等异化名称，查阅国际船期公告很不方便；如果定要汉译，也要附上英语原名。b，如果是中国船舶，采用汉语拼音，如“粤海铁1号” “Yue Hai Tie 1 Hao”，不易自做主张译为“GuangzhouHaikou Railway No. 1”，否则结果同上。c，文本环境下大写首字母即可，如“泰山”轮 应当写作 S.S. “Taishan”.d，船舶名均用引号，如上述各例e，汉语中该船,此船”或“它”指代，英语中应使用she或her，因为英语叙述过程中更有可能使用代词来指代名词，古英语中名词皆有“性”的痕迹。（30）兹确认收到你方6月20日的来函，此函要求我方将标题货物投保保险，保险费由你方承担。难点：汉语没有从句结构，需要进一步解释的概念，术语，核心词，只好再说一遍才能引起下一句，如“来函”，“此函”，“保险”与“保险费”。这在英语中利用从句，介词短语，现在分词短语等结构，可以很容易地处理为长句式。牛刀小试：1） This is to acknowledge the receipt of your letter dated 20th July requesting us to effect insurance on the captioned shipment for your account.句中dated July 20的逻辑主语是letter，英语利用了过去分词短语作后置定语；requesting us to effect.的逻辑主语也是letter，译文利用了现在分词结构。Letter自动担当起下一意群的主语，无需再译“此函”一词。同理，for your account的修饰对象是insurance，“保险费”无需另行译写。当然，一一对应结构也可译为：This is to acknowledge the receipt of your letter dated 20th July. Your letter requests / requested us to effect insurance on the captioned shipment, and the premium(s) / expense(s) will be for your account.从语法上讲是对的，但从修辞效果和交际效果看，不如第一种行文言简意赅，公函色彩更浓。运用英语的从句结构，同一汉语原文还可译为下列两种形式：a，This is to acknowledge the receipt of your letter dated July 20, which requests / requested us to effect insurance on the captaioned shipment at your expense.b,This is to acknowledge the receipt of your letter, which was dated 20th July and requested us to effect insurance, at your expense, on the captioned shipment.如果词汇量不够，也可译为：a：This is to tell you that weve got your letter of July 20.You asked us to insure your goods and you said you would pay for it / the insurance policy.b,We are writing to you about your July 20 Letter, In the letter you said you would pay for the insuracne of your order and asked us to insure it for you.c,Your letter of July 20 has been received. We understand from it that you would like us to insure your shipment, with the premium(s) to be paid by you.兹”为汉语公文信函起始常用套语，类似的表达还有“谨”等等。与之等值的说法不是一个单词，而是一些固定句型，可以译为：This is to acknowledge.We are writing to you about. (31)我们已向中国人民保险公司替上述货物按金额5，000美元投保了一切险；我们正在按要求开列保险单，并将在下周二将保险单连同保险费的索款通知单一起寄给你方。English: We are pleased to inform you that we have covered the above shipment with the Peoples Insurance Company of China against All Risks for USD 5,000. The policy is being prepared accordingly and will be forwarded to you by next Tuesday together with