商务沟通技巧cha.ppt

Chapter Seven Non-verbal Skills,i. The Significant Role of Non-verbal Communication ii. Non-Verbal Delivery Skills iii. Non-Verbal Listening Skills,Business Communication Fundamentals,Speech is silver; silence is golden.,What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say. -R. W. Emerson 65% to 90% of what you communicate is nonverbal. Theres language in her eyes, her cheek, her lip. Nay, her foot speaks. -W. Shakespeare Those who know do not talk. Those who talk do not know. -Lao Zi,Nonverbal Communication,The non-verbal contents of communication outweigh the verbal in both accuracy and validity. Value placed against body language and voice tone: Tone of Voice 38% Body Language 55% Words Used 7% (Source: Mehrabian and Ferris, 1967, Inference of Attitudes from Non-verbal Communication in Two Channels, The Journal of Counseling Psychology, Vol.31, pp248-252),I. Nonverbal Delivery Skills,Vocal qualities Body language Proxemics Objects,Vocal Qualities,Grandma: You are a naughty little boy, arent you? (Grandma said with a laugh, a lilt in her voice, the end of sentence lifted to indicate her approval and pleasure at her naughty grandson.) Sam: Yes. (said Sam with a grinning up at her.) Grandma laughs and ruffles his hair.,Vocal Qualities,John gave Bill a cheery “Hello”. “Hello”, John said snappishly. “Hello”, John said conspiratorially. “Hello”, said John coldly.,Vocal Qualities,Inflection: variation in pitch Expressive; Non-monotonous Volume: how loudly you speak Too quietly to be heard Too loudly for the size of the room Rate: the speed at which you speak Slow enough to be understood Fast enough to maintain energy,Vocal Qualities,Fillers: (verbal pauses) er, uh, um, ya Collect your thoughts Articulation: the clarity of your pronunciation Avoid mumbling which may be regarded as sounding uneducated or hurried. (gonna, wanna, guvmint, whassssat),Two-Minute Vocal Warm Up,Good speech takes muscle! (You should smile when phoning!) 1. Drink a cup of water. 2. Read every word loudly, clearly and properly. 3. These are not tongue-twisters. DO NOT RACE. 4. Work up gradually until you can comfortably do the entire exercise.,Two-Minute Vocal Warm Up,Eat each green pea. Aim straight at the game. It is in Italy. I tried my kite. Father was calm as he threw the bomb on the dock. An awed audience applauded Claude. Go slow Joe, youre stepping on my toe. Up the bluff, Bud runs with the cup of love.,Body Language,1. Hand distasteful) BUT With more hand movements, you appear freer, more open and more honest. Different languages employ different hand gestures.,2. Posture,Sit or stand in a relaxed manner - squarely facing your audience, with your weight balanced. Dont sway side to side, back and forth, or up and down on toes.,Curious 2. Doubtful 3. Interested 4. Refuse 5. Observe 6. Self-content 7. Welcome 8. Assertive 9. Secretive 10. Inquire 11. Attentive 12. Irritable 13. Excited 14. Relaxed 15. Suspicious 16. Sneaky 17. Shy 18. Pondering 19. Artificial,3. Facial Expression,Facial expression: Be relaxed to look interested and animated. Avoid a stony, deadpan expression.,3. Facial Expression,Mouth: Surrounded by numerous tiny muscles, the mouth is a positive goldmine of additional information providing invaluable clues to peoples responses. The lower lip is a great give-way, tightening perhaps with doubt or fear, expanding with delight, pleasure or surprise, trembling with sadness or regret, and moistening with desire.,3. Facial Expression,Flesh color: Facial coloration often changes with stress. It is possible to go white with fear, as the blood drains rapidly from the face. Breathing rate When you feel stressful (giving a speech), your breath may come higher up your chest, more shallow, faster. When you are relaxed breathing becomes calmer and slower, from the lower abdomen.,Smile and Laugh,Japanese: smiles to strangers (American greetings but a sexual maniac or an impolite person to Japanese) Arabian: embarrassed to strangers smiles (walking on campus) Vietnamese: American friends easily made and forgotten (They talk and smile too much.) African dont take laugh as a sign of amusement but surprise, wonder, embarrassment and even discomfiture/failure.,4. Eye Contact,The eyes are the mirror of the soul. Eye contact is the cement that binds together speakers and their audiences. We all know that when people are lying (or modifying the truth), they will avoid looking at us. Or, because they know this themselves, they will spend the whole time staring fixedly at our eyes saying: No, honestly really thats the truth - and we still know they are lying.,4. Eye Contact,“Your lips tell me no, no, but theres yes, yes in your eyes.” Eye contact in casual conversations vs. lecturing or addressing (60%) Blacks (They arent there!) vs. whites (avoidance with anyone in the street) Americans (complain staring) vs. Europeans (American women embarrassed in France or Italy when really looked at: eyes, hair, nose, lips, breasts, hips, legs thighs, knees, ankles, feet, clothes, hairdo, even their walk.),4. Eye Contact,An American girl may complain to her mom after first dating with a Chinese boy: “Oh, Mom. He even didnt look at me!” 40%,After-class Assignment 1,How important is eye contact in personal communication in China?,Proxemics,A symbolic space of two feet. Americans British Arabians,Proxemics,High Contact Cultures: (Latin America, the Mediterranean) close-positive and good far-negative and bad Low Contact Cultures: (the Far East) Moderate Contact: (the United States),Proxemics,Hand shake (only reserved for men-Africa, India, the Middle East) PDA African interpretation of sexual kissing mouth-to-mouth “Look at them - they eat each others saliva and dirt.”,Objects,You are what you wear! Dont wear clothes or trappings that will distract from what you are saying - exaggerated dangling jewelry or flashy gay ties.,Objects,In a Job Interview,The Winning Look You never get a second chance to make a first impression. Women wear a two-piece suit in grey or dark blue with a white or pale colored blouse and conservative heels. Men wear a three-piece suit in dark blue or grey, solid or with a subdued pinstripe(细条纹), with a pale blue solid shirt and a conservative tie.,Can you tell which country they are from?,Why can you tell them easily?,What makes you tell those girls nationalities? From what you judge it? That is called self-image Self-image concludes all things of you ,even the styles of your clothes, the properties you have and the culture of you.,The sixth sense is simply when we are using the five senses but are unable to describe the way in which we sense information.,The Sixth Sense,The Sixth Sense,II. Nonverbal Listening Skills,If we were supposed to talk more than we listen, we would have two tongues and one ear. - Mark Twain,Active Listening Why NOT Listening? Risks of Interruption,l 倾听是一种常用的工作方式，倾听在工作中比在课堂上更重要，工作中倾听不可能做笔记，而且讲话者叙述时也不一定很有条理性。 要用心倾听，而不是用耳朵。用耳朵听，只破解声音，用心倾听才能正确理解。 工作中，你不但要倾听信息，有时还要注意同事、朋友的情感。,Why are we not listening?,Were given no reason to listen. Our minds are closed. Wed rather be talking so that we would feel more involved and more in control. We think we have something better to say ourselves. Were busy listening to our own thoughts instead. Were thinking about what well say when its our turn to speak. We think we know what theyll say. There are too many distractions. We dont like the speaker or the message. We mentally criticize the message or the speaker. We filter the speakers message, hearing only what we want to hear. We jump to conclusions. Weve had a busy day and were too tired to listen carefully. We put what we hear into the context of our own experiences rather than trying to see things from the speakers viewpoint.,You give your whole argument away too early, leaving no space quietly to change the way you put your case in the light of the other persons arguments. If you do not allow the other person to complete what they have to say, you may not hear things you need to know in order to understand how they are thinking. By continual interruption you will cause irritation rather than encourage cooperation.,Three Risks in frequent interruption:,After-class Assignment 2,At last, after four years of college you are about to embark on your first employment interview. You know the importance of making a good impression, so you pay particular attention to every detail of your physical appearance. After showering you look in the mirror and decide to trim your beard. However, as you reflect further you conclude that the beard must go. At the same instant you mutter something about the fact that people will do anything for a job.,Now the after-shave lotion is splashed on so that you will smell as good as you look. Then you select a freshly ironed shirt, one that matches the new suit and tie.