四级作文佳作赏析及佳句临摹7篇.doc

Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Travel Alone or Travel with a Companion? You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 1)有的人喜欢独自旅行，有的人喜欢与别人结伴而行 2)两种旅行方式各自的好处 3)你更喜欢哪种旅行方式，为什么? Travel Alone or Travel with a Companion? _ _ _ 行文思路 本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出两种不同的旅行方式，提纲第2点要求分别阐述两种旅行方式的好处，提纲第3点要求表明“我”的倾向，由此可判断本文应为对比选择型作文。 根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：指出人们对旅行方式的不同偏好：有人喜欢独自旅行，有人喜欢结伴旅行;对比阐述独自旅行和结伴旅行各自的好处;表明“我”更喜欢于哪种旅行方式，并说明理由。 高分范文 Travel Alone or Travel with a Companion? 1When it comes to traveling way, different people will offer different opinions. 2Some people like to travel alone, 2while others prefer to travel with a companion. 3Of course, everyone has his consideration for his preference. 4Traveling alone, one can enjoy more freedom. The traveler can arrange his tour as he wishes without the trouble of humoring（迎合） others. 3Moreover, traveling alone 5tend to bring the traveler 6unexpected surprise, 7such as making a new friend and enjoying a different scenery. 8Compared with traveling alone, traveling with a companion has also its advantages. 3For one thing, the group members can help and look after each other in the journey. 3For another, 4traveling with others who have same interest with, you can share costs and experiences with them. 9As to me, I prefer to travel with a companion. 3Firstly, we can deal with the possible problems and difficulties in the journey. 3Secondly, I like to share the pleasure of traveling with others. 3In sum, 10both traveling alone and traveling with a companion have their attractions, and you can find the pleasure from either one. 【亮点点评】 1“当涉及到或谈到时”。 2用于提出两种不同的观点、态度或喜好。 3过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。 4现在分词短语作伴随状语。 5“倾向，趋于”。 6“意外的惊喜”。 7表示列举。 8“和相比”。 9用于引出自己的观点或选择。 10“或者，或者”。 佳句临摩 1.佳句：When it comes to traveling way, different people will offer different opinions. 临摩：当谈到是否应该取消“黄金周”假期时，人们的看法各不相同。 _. 2.佳句：Compared with traveling alone, traveling with a companion has also its advantages. 临摩：和城市相比，乡村的经济相对落后。 3_. 3.佳句：Both traveling alone and traveling with a companion have their attractions, and you can find the pleasure from either one. 临摩：网络教学和传统教学都有其各自的优点，因此，我们应该将二者相结合。 _. Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic The Moonlight Clan. You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 1)现在很多年轻人每个月都把自己赚的钱花光，他们被称作“月光族” 2)有人认为这是一种时尚的消费观念，但很多人反对这样消费 3)我对此的看法是 The Moonlight Clan _ _ _ 行文思路 本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出一种现象，提纲第2点针对该现象提出两种不同的观点，提纲第3点要求谈谈“我”的看法，由此可判断本文应为对比选择型作文。 根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：描述“月光族”现象，引出对这一现象的不同看法;对比阐述两种看法各自的理由;表明“我”对“月光族”的看法并说明理由。 高分范文 The Moonlight Clan Nowadays, more and more people, 1especially the young are joining in the army of “the moonlight clan”. These people exhaust their earnings every month without any savings. 2Many people think this is a fashionable life style, 2while more other people object to this kind of consumption style. 3Those who support “the moonlight clan” think that those people know how to enjoy life and have a higher life quality. 3However, more other people criticize “the moonlight clan”. They say that the consumption habit of “the moonlight clan” is unhealthy and sometimes wasteful. In addition, no savings will 4place “the moonlight clan” in a difficult position 5in case of unexpected expenses. 6Weighing these two arguments, I prefer to the latter one. In my eyes, 7though “the moonlight clan” may acquire temporary satisfaction from their consumption, 8in the long term, it 9is unfavorable to their family and career. 10Just as a proverb says, one should always prepare for a rainy day. 【亮点点评】 1“尤其，特别”。 2用于提出两种对立观点。 3用于引出两种对立观点各自的理由。 4“使处于艰难的境地”。 5“以防，万一”。 6用于表明“我”的倾向。 7though引导让步状语从句。 8“从长远来看”。 9“对不利”。 10引用谚语结尾，值得借鉴。 佳句临摩 1.佳句：Many people think this is a fashionable life style, while more other people object to this kind of consumption style. 临摩：勇敢的人往往会获得更多的机会，而懦弱的人面对机会也有可能错过。 _. 2.佳句：Those who support “the moonlight clan” think that those people know how to enjoy life and have a higher life quality. 临摩：持悲观态度的那些人认为地球上有限的能源很快就会枯竭。 _. 3.佳句：Just as a proverb says, one should always prepare for a rainy day. 临摩：正如一句谚语所说的，“机会只给那些有准备的人。” _. Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic A Food Poisoning Accident. You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 你的几个同学因食用了从某超市买回的食品而中毒，幸亏及时治疗而脱险。请描述他(们)中毒与脱险的过程，并呼吁要加强食品安全。 A Food Poisoning Accident _ _ _ 行文思路 本题属于情景式命题。提纲要求描述一件事情的经过，由此可判断本文应为记叙文。 根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：交待食物中毒的背景和原因;叙述中毒的和脱险的经过;谈谈由此引发的感想，呼吁加强食品安全。 高分范文 A Food Poisoning Accident Last month, I 1witnessed a food poisoning accident 2happening to my classmates. At that time the situation was really very dangerous and urgent. Though finally they got out of danger, this accident 3is still vivid in my mind. That day was Julies birthday, one of my classmates. In order to celebrate it, her roommates bought a big birthday cake for her from a supermarket nearby. They shared the cake happily. 4However, after a while, all of them felt abdominal pain（急性腹痛）, nausea（恶心） and dizziness. Two of them even cannot stand up because of great pain. We 5rushed to send them to the hospital. 6It turned out that the cake they ate had expired（到期） its guarantee period. Fortunately, 7due to timely treatment, they all recovered very soon. 4However, this accident 8leaves me a deep ponder（沉思）. I think it is very urgent to take effective measures to improve food safety. 4Firstly, the government should 9strengthen supervision and administration（监管） on food safety. 4More importantly, to those who immoral（不道德的） businessmen, more strict punishment should be given. 4Besides, we consumers should be more careful in buying food. 10Only in this way can we make sure that no same accident happens. 【亮点点评】 1“目睹，目击”。 2“发生在某人身上”，现在分词短语作定语。 3“仍然令我记忆犹新”。 4过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。 5“闻讯赶来”。 6“结果是，原来是”。 7“由于及时的治疗”。 8“留给我深深的思考”。 9“加强监管”。 10“only+状语”位于句首，引起句子部分倒装。 佳句临摩 1.佳句：Though finally they got out of danger, this accident is still vivid in my mind. 临摩：尽管这件事情已经过去了很多，但它仍然让我记忆犹新。 _. 2.佳句：It turned out that the cake they ate had expired its guarantee period. 临摩：结果他没能在红灯前通过那个路口，而和另外一辆车撞在了一起。 _. 3.佳句：It is very urgent to take effective measures to improve food safety. 临摩：现在的当务之急是帮助大学生树立一个正确的就业观。 _. Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Parental Hopes and Personal Ideals. You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 1)父母都会望子成龙，但是父母的期望有时候会与他们孩子的理想发生矛盾 2)分析这种矛盾产生的原因 3)应该如何解决这一矛盾 Parental Hopes and Personal Ideals _ _ _ 行文思路 本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点提出一个问题，提纲第2点要求分析这一问题产生的原因，提纲第3点要求说明如何解决该问题，由此可判断本文应为问题解决型作文。 根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：描述父母的期望和孩子的理想之间的矛盾;分析这种矛盾产生的主要原因;说明解决这一矛盾的办法。 高分范文 Parental Hopes and Personal Ideals All parents hope their children will have a bright future. However, parents expectations for their children are not always 1in accordance（一致） with their childrens personal ideals, 2and sometimes they are even conflicting with each other. This is often a main cause for quarrels and gaps between parents and children. 3But what lead to the conflict between parental hopes and personal ideals? 3The following three factors contribute to the conflict. 4First of all, in this fast-changing society, parents and children have too many differences in mind. 4Secondly, traditional patriarchy（家长制） is still influencing Chinese parents in modern society. They are used to making decisions for their children. 4Third, nowadays young people have strong independence, 5who want to plan their own future and control their own destiny. 4Thus the conflict between parents and children inevitably appear. 6In order to solve the conflict, both parents and children should pay their efforts. 4For one thing, parents should give their children rights to make their own decisions. They may help their children make choices 7instead of replacing them to make choices. 4For another, children should learn to respect their parents advices 8since parents tend to have more life experience. 4Besides, to communicate with each other actively is necessary to their understanding each other. As long as both parents and children learn to think 9from the other sides point of view, the conflicts between them can be avoided. 【亮点点评】 1“和一致”。 2表示递进。 3通过转折和设问句引出原因,容易引起注意。 4过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。 5who引导非限制性定语从句。 6“为了”，表示目的，常用于句首。 7“代替，而不是”。 8since引导原因状语从句，表示既定的原因，常译为“既然”。 9“从对方的角度”。 佳句临摩 1.佳句：Parents expectations for their children are not always in accordance with their childrens personal ideals, and sometimes they are even conflicting with each other. 临摩：过多的压力使得许多大学生产生抑郁、焦虑等心理疾病，甚至导致一些大学生自杀。 _. 2.佳句：Nowadays young people have strong independence, who want to plan their own future and control their own destiny. （非限制定语从句）临摩：郊区的新鲜空气和美丽风景对那些忍受着空气污染和噪音的城市居民会有很大的吸引力。 _. 3.佳句：In order to solve the conflict, both parents and children should pay their efforts. 临摩：为了保持旧的友谊，许多同学每天花费一两个小时给亲密的老朋友打电话。 _. Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Does a Student Need Private Tutoring? You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below:1)根据调查，目前在全国的大城市中有大约80%的中学生都有私人家教 2)分析中学生请家教的利弊3)你的看法Does a Student Need Private Tutoring? _行文思路本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出一种现象，提纲第2点要求分析这种现象的利弊，提纲第3点要求谈谈“我”的看法，由此可判断本文应为对比选择型作文。根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：描述中学生请家教的现状;分析中学生请家教的利弊;谈谈“我”对中学生请家教现象的看法。高分范文Does a Student Need Private Tutoring?A recent investigation shows that about 70 percent of middle school students in cities have private tutors. Such a popular practice indicates that people are 1attaching greater importance to education. 2However, private tutoring 3has both advantages and disadvantages.Many parents have no enough ability or time to help their children in study. Private tutoring is a good solution to this problem. 2In addition, private tutoring is usually one-to-one, so the teacher can know 4the weak points as well as 4the strong points of the pupil, and thus teaching is, 5in most cases, directly to the point. 2On the other hand, private tutoring has its own disadvantages.2For one thing, it takes up so much of the pupils time that he can hardly find enough time for rest and entertainment. 2For another, some tutors, 5busy “shuttling”（穿梭） from one family to another, 6tend to neglect their teaching duties as tutors.7Considering the above-mentioned, I think 3the disadvantages of private tutoring outweigh its advantages. In my opinion, greater emphasis should be laid 8on classroom teaching and practice, 8on the improvement of teaching quality 8and on the tapping of the pupils potential. 9Only in this way can a new generation be healthily brought up.【亮点点评】1“非常关注”。2过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。3“有利有弊”。“弊大于利”。4“弱点”。“优点”。5插入语。6“倾向于，往往”。7用于得出结论。considering用作介词，意为“考虑到，鉴于”。8and连接的平行结构。9“only+状语”位于句首，引起句子部分倒装。佳句临摩1.佳句：Teaching is, in most cases, directly to the point.（插入语）临摩：无论多么困难的一项任务，只要有决心都能够完成。_.2.佳句：It takes up so much of the pupils time that they can hardly find enough time for rest and entertainment.临摩：社会上有如此多的诱惑以至于稍一疏忽就可能误入歧途。_.3.佳句：Some tutors tend to neglect their regular teaching duties.临摩： 传统食物的烹饪往往很耗时，而且需要花费很多时间和精力去学习。_.Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Skipping Classes on College Campus. You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 1)大学里逃课现象时有发生 2)分析学生逃课的原因 3)如何减少逃课现象 Skipping Classes on College Campus _ _ 行文思路 本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出一种现象，提纲第2点要求分析该现象产生的原因，提纲第3点要求说明如何解决该问题，由此可判断本文应为问题解决型作文。 根据所给提纲，本文应包含如下内容：描述大学生逃课现象及主要表现;分析大学生逃课的主要原因;说明应该如何减少逃课现象。 高分范文 Skipping Classes on College Campus In colleges and universities, the phenomenon of students skipping classes is not unusual. There are often some students who skip those classes for feeling uncomfortable or other private reasons. 1Besides, still some students are absent in classes without any reason but for they dont want to. 2There are two main reasons for college students skip classes. 1First, 3compared with in middle school, students have more freedom in college. 4It depends more on one students consciousness 4whether he will attend the class. So those students lacking self-discipline begin to skip classes. 1Second, some teachers classes could not attract students interests 5so that some students 6would rather skip classes to study what they are interested in. 7For whatever reasons, skipping classes 8does bring negative effects on students study. 1Therefore, 9it is necessary to take some effective measures to reduce this phenomenon. 1On the one hand, the school and teachers should make students realize the negative effects of skipping classes and increase their consciousness of attending the class. 1On the other hand, teachers have to improve their teaching quality to attract students interests. 10Only in this way can the phenomenon of skipping classes be reduced as soon as possible. 【亮点点评】 1过渡衔接词语，使文章条理清晰、衔接紧密。 2用于引出原因。 3“和相比”。 4it充当形式主语，whether从句是真正的主语。 5so that引导结果状语从句。 6“宁愿”。 7“不管什么原因”。 8强调谓语动词。 9用于引出解决办法。 10“only+状语”位于句首，引起句子部分倒装。 佳句临摩 1.佳句：It depends more on one students consciousness whether he will attend the class. 临摩：在过去，一个学生只要成绩好就行，有没有好的身体不要紧。 _. 2.佳句：Some teachers classes could not attract students interests so that some students would rather skip classes to study what they are interested in. 临摩：他们的时间完全被工作占据以至于几乎没有时间和孩子们认真交流。 _. 3.佳句：For whatever reasons, skipping classes does bring negative effects on students study. 临摩：不管学习外语的原因是什么，它都能够使一个人受益。 _. Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition on the topic Social Practice of College Students. You should write at least 120 words, and base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 1)各大学在假期都会组织学生参加各种社会实践活动 2)这些活动给大学生带来了哪些好处 3)参加社会实践活动应该注意些什么 Social Practice of College Students _ _ _ 行文思路 本题属于提纲式文字命题。提纲第1点指出一种现象，提纲第2点要求分析这种现象带来的好处，提纲第3点要求指出注意事项，由此