作文试卷讲评课-538

1、期中考试试卷分析期中考试试卷分析书面表达书面表达Which one do you like better？Which one do you think is better？一、 卷面“高颜值”标准1 . 卷面工整 无涂改2 . 字数足够3 . 三段式二、期中考试内容：二、期中考试内容： 假定你是李华假定你是李华, , 针对学校出版的校园杂志并不受针对学校出版的校园杂志并不受同学欢迎的现象同学欢迎的现象, , 你对杂志做了仔细研究你对杂志做了仔细研究, , 发现其中发现其中的文章内容过于单一。的文章内容过于单一。 请写一封信给编辑请写一封信给编辑, , 建议他做建议他做适当的调整适当的调整, ,

2、 增添更多其他与校园生活相关的话题增添更多其他与校园生活相关的话题, , 如学习、友谊、健康、实事等。如学习、友谊、健康、实事等。注意：注意：1 1 词数词数100100左右左右 2 2 可以适当增加细节可以适当增加细节 以使行文连贯以使行文连贯 1 1 . . 要点要点 高考写作评分标准1 1、要点齐全、要点齐全, , 表达准确表达准确, , 可以考虑给可以考虑给4 4挡挡16201620； 语言表达质量较好者语言表达质量较好者 升至升至5 5档档21252125； 缺少一个要点扣5分（相当于降一档） 只有一个要点者, 即使语言表达质量优秀,最高也不超过15分 出现不相关内容 扣12分 抄袭

3、0分2 2 、个别信息有一定的拓展、个别信息有一定的拓展3 3、 不根据个别高级词汇不根据个别高级词汇, , 高级句型来决定文章的档次高级句型来决定文章的档次, , 这些只这些只能是加分参考项能是加分参考项Dear editor， ILi Hua. I found the school magazines are not popular with students. Through my research , I find the reason is that it includes a lot of articles which is simple and boring. I think y

4、ou can make a change. Here are some suggestions for you. You can add more pictures and articles. They can help have the magazines more interesting. It is important for students reading. I hope you can take my advice. Dear editor ILi Hua. I find the school magzines are not popular with students. Thro

5、ugh my research , I find the reason is that it includes a lot of articles which is simple and boring. I think you can make a change. Here are some suggestions for you. You can add more pictures and selecting articles about school life such as study , health , friendship , current affairs and so on.

6、They can help have the magazines more interesting. It is important for students reading. I hope you can take my advice.select make to read aremagazines二、内容：二、内容：1 1 . . 要点要点 2 2 . . 语言语言 Dear editor , I m Li Hua. I find the school magzines are not popular with students. Through my research , I find

7、the reason is that it includes a lot of articles which is simple and boring. I think you can make a change. Here are some suggestions for you. You can add more pictures and selecting articles about school life such as study , health , friendship , current affairs and so on. They can help have the ma

8、gazines more interesting. It is important for students reading. I hope you can take my advice.二、内容：二、内容：1 1 . . 要点要点 2 . 2 . 语言语言 3 . 3 . 三段式三段式Dear editor, I often read the school magazines ,which I found are not popular with students. I have made a research and I find that the content of the artic

9、les is simple and boring. As for this problem, I am writing this letter to give you some advice. First , it would be better if you add more topics , such as study ,friendship ,health and the articles current affairs , which are very interesting to students. Whats more, adding jokes in the magazine i

10、s a good way to improve the magazine , because it makes students happy and relaxed. Therefore ,it will give us a desire to read the magazine. I hope you find these ideas useful. Yours Sincerely,Dear editor, I often read the school magazines ,which I think are not popular with students. I made a rese

11、arch and I found that the content of the articles is simple and boring. As for this problem , I am writing this letter to give some advice. First , it would be better if you add more topics , such as study ,friendship ,health and current affairs , because they are very interesting to students. Whats

12、 more, adding jokes in the magazine is a good way to attract people, because it makes students happy and relaxed , therefore ,which gives students a desire to read the magazine.I hope you find these ideas useful. Yours Sincerely,1 . _ 问题 _ 开头段开头段 2 . . 目的目的: As for this problem ,I am writing this le

13、tter to give you some advice. 建议建议1 1 解释解释1 1 中间段中间段 建议建议2 2 解释解释2 2 结果结果2 2 结尾段结尾段建议类作文思维框架Dear Li Dear Li HuaHua , ,一、开头一、开头 问题问题 + + As for this problem , I am writing this letter to As for this problem , I am writing this letter to give some advicegive some advice. . 二、中间段二、中间段 First First , ,建议

14、建议1+ 1+ 解释解释1 1 （+ +结果结果1 1） Second Second , ,建议建议2+ 2+ 解释解释2 2（+ +结果结果2)2) ThirdThird , ,建议建议3+ 3+ 解释解释3 3（+ +结果结果3)3)三、结尾段三、结尾段 I hope you find these ideas useful. I hope you find these ideas useful. Yours SincerelyYours Sincerely“第二 ” “第三” “我建议我建议” . . . . . . . . . . . . “这这. . . . . . . . . . ”

15、 Whats more ,Whats more ,Besides ,Besides ,At the same time ,At the same time , . . . . . . . . . . . . It would be better if . . . It would be better if . . . doing doing sthsth is a good way to . . . is a good way to . . . Youd better do . . . Youd better do . . . It is necessary to do It is neces

16、sary to do sthsth be supposed to be supposed to As is known to all , As is known to all , . . . . . .Furthermore ,Furthermore ,Last but not least,Last but not least,. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . , which makes . . . . , which makes sbsb do do sthsth. . . . . , making making sbsb do do sthsth . . . .

17、. , which helps . . . . . , which helps sbsb do do sthsth, , . . . . . , helping . . . . . , helping sbsb do do sthsthPractice假设你是李平假设你是李平, , 你的朋友你的朋友DavidDavid想减肥想减肥, , 作为好友作为好友, , 请你用英语给请你用英语给他写一封他写一封E-mail , E-mail , 建议他用适当的方法来减重建议他用适当的方法来减重 。 包括下列内容包括下列内容: :1 1 减重的方法减重的方法: : 运动和节食运动和节食2 2 不要使用减肥

18、药（不要使用减肥药（weight-loss pillsweight-loss pills） 注意：注意：100100词左右词左右Dear David ,Dear David , _ You sincerely Li Huaproper建议类作文思维框架Dear Li Dear Li HuaHua , ,一、开头一、开头 问题问题 + + I am writing this letter to give some adviceI am writing this letter to give some advice. . 二、中间段二、中间段 First First , ,建议建议1+ 1+ 解释

19、解释1 1 （+ +结果结果1 1） Second Second , ,建议建议2+ 2+ 解释解释2 2（+ +结果结果2)2) ThirdThird , ,建议建议3+ 3+ 解释解释3 3（+ +效果效果3)3)三、结尾段三、结尾段 I hope you find these ideas useful. I hope you find these ideas useful. Yours SincerelyYours Sincerely好友好友David想减肥想减肥, 请你建议他用适当的方法来减重请你建议他用适当的方法来减重 I heard you want to lose weight ,and you are not sure how to do it correctly. As for this problem, I am writing this E-mail to give you some advice. First , it would better if you exercise regularly , because it will