作文高分突破.ppt

1、作文高分突破,漂亮句子写作 逻辑组织技巧 写作常见错误分析,漂亮句子写作,1.完整性 句子完整包括语法无残缺，概念无遗漏。句子不完整是考生常犯的错误。如： he was the most popular poet. 是在什么时间，范围内受欢迎？ 显然表达不完整。 改为： he was the most popular poet in America, in 19th century.,2. 一致性 包括主谓一致、代词与先行词一致、分次、动名词、不定式的逻辑主语与句子主语语法一致。（这几类在后面说明）。,除此外，人称、数、时态、语态及结构上的不恰当转换也会破坏句子一致性。如： 1）he wait

2、s patiently on the platform until the train came.(时态不一致） 2) the students who want to go out for a picnic need to sign his name in the notebook. （人称） 3) he is good not only at music but also plays football well.（结构） 4) I wrote to him, but my letter was not answered.（语态）,3. 简洁性 简洁才是美好的写作，首先而且至关重要的一点就是

3、简洁。繁冗的写作堆砌了许多无用的词藻，反而减弱表述的清晰度。当然，也不能仅仅因为简短就认为短句一定优于长句。,1）避免过多使用空洞、多余的短语 比较下面这对句子，注意体会二者的差别及效果。 1) Dr. Sun Yat-sen went to Japan by means of a big boat. 2) Dr. Sun Yat-sen went to Japan by boat. by就是by means of 。,It will be our aim to ensure proper health care for each and every one of the Chinese pe

4、ople. Our aim is to ensure proper health care for all Chinese. He has no sense of principles, whether he is in public or in private. He has no principles, public or private.,2）避免过多使用并列句。如： Eugene was an American playwright, and he had unhappy childhood, and he told the story of his childhood in a pl

5、ay, and he said it was written in tears and blood. Eugene , an American playwright, told the story of his unhappy childhood in a play, which he said was written in tears and blood.,3)避免过多使用从句。 过多使用从句会把主次概念混为一谈，削弱句子重点，如： he is a man who is honest, who always pays his just debts, and who observes the

6、golden rules in his dealings with others. He is an honest man who always pays his debts, and who o,逻辑组织技巧,英语中的过渡句和连接词是文章通顺连贯的重要标志，根据语法中的平行和从属结构原则，一个复合句中必须要有一个连接词，否则句子是不符合语法规则的。如： All flights had been cancelled, the passengers had to go there by train. 改为：Because all flights had been cancelled, the p

7、assengers had to go there by train. 或All flights had been cancelled, so the passengers had to go there by train. All flights having been cancelled, the passengers had to go there by train.,由以上例子可以看出，复合句内部必须要有连接词，有时句子之间也需要连接词，而连接词体现的是句子内部和句子之间严谨的逻辑和论证推理关系，是英文语言最大的价值之一。 更多连接词见补充材料。,写作常见错误分析,5种用词错误 6种常

8、见句子错误,5种用词错误,1.误解词义导致用词错误 有些考生在写作时。选用自己没有完全掌握词义或用法的单词、组词造句，是造成用词错误的原因之一如： （1） The young man always puts on leather shoes （2） Both salt and sugar are easy to melt in hot water. （3）They persuaded their son to try again，but he just turned a deaf ear to them. （4） It is uneasy for the children to do such

9、 a thing,1）The young man always wears leather shoes（put on表示穿的动作，不表示穿着的状态，而此句表达的意思是“穿着”，而不是“穿上”。） （2）Both salt and Sugar are easy to dissolve In hot water（melt常指物体经加热后熔化或者易溶物质受热溶化，不指溶质在溶剂中溶解。） （3）They advised their son to try again，but he Just turned a deaf ear to them。（persuade sbto do sth是“说服某人去做某

10、事” 。persuade用过去时或完成时，则意味着对方已经接受劝告而去做某事了。但此句的第1部分用了he just turned a deaf ear to them，这在词义上造成了前后矛盾的逻辑错误） （4）It is difficult for the children to do such a thing。（uneasy是由前缀un加词根easy构成，在古英语中有“不容易”的意思。但在现代英语中， uneasy已不表示easy的反义“不容易”了。而是“心神不安”的意思 ）,2. 不符合英语习惯导致的用词错误 l） We all hope him to get the first pri

11、ze。 （2） Mr，Smith denied my invitation to a dinner party。 （3）Who IS responsible for this department？ （4） She will probably be elected woman chairman.,1）We all expect him to get the first prize（hope的用法只有hope to do sth或hopethat从句结构，却不能说hope sb， to do sth。 ） （2）MrSmith declined my invitation to a dinner

12、 party。（deny可作“拒绝接受”讲，不过当表示“拒绝接受邀请”时，英语习惯一般不用deny an invitation） （3）Who IS In charge of this department？（responsible for通常指对某件事的后果负责。如果指时某一方面的工作或某一部门的工作负责，就不能用be responsible for。） （4）She will probably be elected chairwoman（woman chairman，是一个词语搭配问题。一般来说。在表示职业的名词前加上man或woman可以区别男女: a woman doctor, a w

13、oman writer ,但是“女主席”、女议长”、 则不能用woman作定语,另外，英语巾某些固定搭配，决不可以随便改变其结构或任意添加、省略其中的某些成分，否则就会造成不符合惯用表达的用词错误。）,3.大词小词滥用 大学英语作文题一般限于生活、常识方面的内容所以，在具体写作中，学生应尽量避免使用大词尤其生僻的词。四级写作命题范围本身就决定了写作文体只能是非正式文体。在这样的大环境下。要想用好大词，并使其与整篇作文相融合是很难的。弄不好就会弄巧成拙，事倍功半。例： （1） I comprehended his statement （2） While we are eating breakfa

14、st，he engaged in an animated conversation （3）He will come In the event that it stops raining。,（1） I understood what he said 2）While eating breakfast，we have a lovely talk （3）He will come if it stops raining 建议把有限的时间用于对核心词汇的掌握努力做到熟练运用这些最常用的词充分表达自己的思想。,4.无用词性 典型的这类错误有：错把名词当动词用，形容词、副词误用，如： （l） My teach

15、er adviced me not to go out alone at night。 （2） She doesnt aware of the importance of the study of English。 （3）Many people present at the meet。 （4） To do this beyond my power （5）This road goes straightly from our school to the center of the city。,以上5句错例可改正如下： （1） My teacher advised me not to go out

16、alone at night （2） She isnt aware of the importance of the study of English. (3) Many people were present at the meeting. (4) To do this is beyond my power. (5) This road goes straight from our school to the center of the city.,英语中有许多形容词具有动作含义，当它们作表语时，千万不要忘了加连系动词，常见的这类形容词Absent， abundant， active， ac

17、curate， afraid， alive， asleep， awake， aware， available， backward， busy， downward，faithful，feasible，fond，keen，present，late，responsible，worried，concerned，interested等。,5.汉语思维导致的用词错误 在四级写作过程中，考生由于对英、汉两种语言、文化间的差异，以及不同文化背景所产生的不同思维方式导致用词错误。,l） Excessive smoking will injure Your body， 2） through inquiry， we

18、 learn that he was elected to a new leading post， 3） we are going to visit the exhibition next week 4） in the basketball game， Our team won the British team. 5）We all enjoy public medicial care.,（1）Excessive smoking will Injure your health （2） On inquiry， we learn that he was elected to a new leadin

19、g post （3） We are going to see the exhibition next week 4） In the basketball game， our team beat the British team， （5）We all enjoy free medical care,6种常见句子错误,1.非完整句错误 一个意思和结构完整的句子至少有三语和谓语两部分，祈使句除外。若将句子中的某一部分当做一个句子，就会导致非完整句错误。考生在句子的完整性方面常常犯以下错误：,1）非独立性从句单独成句 非独立性从句指那些由关系代词（who，whom，whose，which，what，t

20、hat）、关系副词（when，where，how）或从属连ii after，before。although，as、if， because、until。unless等）引导的句子。这些句子只能在主句中起一个句子成分的作用，因而不能脱离主句而独立存在。一旦脱离主句就会出现非完整句错误。如： We must try hard to learn English well. Because It will be very useful in our future work We must try hard to learn English well，because It will be very use

21、ful in our future work 这种错句的修改只要根据具体情况把从句归属到主句中去就可以了，当然标点和大小写需要做相应调整.,2) 现在分词独立成句 现在分词短语以及它的独立主格结构在句子中往往充当状语，表示原因、目的、结果、伴随状况等。如： They got up early that morning. Hoping to catch up the 630 train to Hong Kong They got up early that morning， hoping to catch up the 630 train to Hong Kong 对于现在分同短语形式的非完整句

22、。最好的办法就是改一下标点和大小写，视语义关系的紧密程度把它并人前面或后面一句，使其充当句子的附属成分。当然也可以加上它的逻辑主语，让它真正独立成句。,（3）细节补充独立句 句子的细节补充部分，例如举例、罗列、补充说明等一般是既不含主语也不含谓语的一组词语的罗列，如果以句子的形式出现肯定是错句。 It is hard to keep with monthly payments Such as telephone， electric， and gas bill It is hard to keep with monthly payments， such as telephone， electri

23、c， and gas bill 与汉语这种讲究“意合”的语言不同，英语严格要求“形合”，即每一个句子都要有自己的主、谓语，否则就被视为错句，非完格句。,4）无主语句 无主语句就是缺少主语的非完整句。如： Tom dreamed of the day that he would have lots of money。 And would use it to buy a nice house。 Tom dreamed of the day that he would have lots of money， and would use it to buy a nice house,While sit

24、ting In class， she realized she had lost a ring. But happily found it on the floor after class While sitting In class, she realized she had lost a ring But she happily found it on the floor after class. 这种错误的出现也是由于学生受汉语的影响，误以为既然动作是由同一主体发出，前句的主语就可以同样作用于后句，没有必要再重复了。如果是在一个并列句当中，这种做法是正确的，问题就出在又把它写成了独立的句

25、子：这映了部分考生对并列句的掌握不够扎实，同时和其他错句错误一样，没有培养出良好的英语语感也是一个很重要的原因,2. 主动和被动错误 在句子写作中，要避免语态的转换，因为语态的转换会不可避免地造成主语的转换：这些转换都会破坏句子连贯性，从而使句子显得拙劣、别扭。如： As soon as the written examination has been finished by the student， he must take the oral examination， as soon as the student has finished the written examination， h

26、e must take the oral examination.。,We climbed to the top of the mountain and a tent was rented for the night. We climbed to the top of the mountain and rented a tent for the night.,在英语写作中，尤其是日常写作中，并不提倡使用被动语态，这一点对以英语为母语的人来讲也是一样。但提倡并不等于绝对不能使用被动语态。在某些特定情况下，被动语态的使用还是相当必要的。例如在表达诸如 “据说，据报道”等没有必要指明动作发出者时，“

27、It is said”就比“People say that”或“The mass media reported that”要简洁、地道得多。,3.主谓不一致错误。 主谓不一致是四级考生写作中最常见的错误之一。而这一点更多地是一个语法基本功的问题。具体来说以下6点：,1）存现句中的主谓一致 存现句中，如果有数个主语并列，动词的数一般与离它最近的那个一致。如： There are a small bed， a wooden table and two oldfashioned chairs In my bedroom There is a small bed， a wooden table and

28、 two oldfashioned chairs In my bedroom 但主语如果是几个并列的单数名词，谓语用复数。如： There are a boy， a girl and a teacher In the classroom,2）带修饰浯的主语与谓语一致 当一个主浯后跟以with，as well as，together with, like, rather than， except，but，including，accompanied besides等词语开始的修饰语时，谓语动词的数只与主语本身保持一致。如： John as well as the rest have agreed

29、to come。 John as well as the rest has agreed to come 主语中如果有all of， most of， lots of， some of等修饰限定语，谓语动词的数应与这些词之后的名词一致: Most of the water in this area are polluted Most of the water in this area is polluted,（3）主谓一致问题中的就近原则 neither.nor，either.or，not onlybut also等平行结构作主语时，谓语动词应与离它最近的那部分主语保持一致， 如： Not o

30、nly the students but also the teacher have doubts。 Not only the students but also the teacher has doubts,（4）不定代词作主语时的主谓一致 下列不定代词和复合代词作主语时，谓语一律用单数：one，no one，nobody，nothing，anyone，anything, everybody，everyone, someone，something，each，either，neither，etc。如： None of her friends have been to New York None

31、 of her friends has been to New York,（5）定语从句的主谓一致 定语从句中，关系代词who，that或which后的动词要与该关系代词所指代的先行词在人称和数上保持一致，如： Computer can do many tasks which is impossible to do by hand。 Computer can do manv tasks which are impossible to do by hand,（6）集合名词作主语时的主谓一致 集合名词以单数形式出现，却常常表达复数的含义。一般来说，当这类名词用来表达整体概念时，后面的动词用单数，而

32、当它们被用来指其组织成员时，谓语就用复数。这类集合名词主要有：audience，family，class，herd，crowd，team，crew等。由于这类词搭配比较复杂，所以在这类词作主语时，考生往往在主谓一致问题上出错。如： My family never intend to have anything to do with business My family never intends to have anything to do with business,4. 修饰语问题 考生在修饰语的运用上出现的问题主要是悬垂修饰语。所谓“修饰语悬垂”，就是如果修饰语放在句首。它的修饰对象必须紧跟其后。否则这修饰就失去了“依靠”，而表达意思也会被歪曲，变得模糊不清。纠正这种错误可以有3种方法：对句子结构做必要的改动，使状语和逻辑主语一致：给状语加上一个适当的逻辑主语，使之成为一个独立结构：将状语改成一个从句，如：,While talking on the telephon