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The Importance of First ImpressionsCarefully lower your paper and let your eyes fall upon the first person you see. Whats your first impression? Posh, picky, yucky or yummy? (Looking in the mirror is not allowed.) If you dont already know the person - thatd be cheating - then how have you come to your conclusions? A forensic ability to scrutinize a person may be a talent you hold, or you could just be like the rest of us, and look at how someone is dressed. We all do it, however subconsciously; yet fashion is never given the credit it deserves for being as powerful as it is. Its invariably regarded as a silly, but necessary, vanity. No political party ever has Clothes: why they matter on its manifesto; the heavyweight minds of the world rarely turn to interpret its semaphore (naturally, I am the exception). But fashion is actually a wonder force, an invention more useful than radio, more capable of altering mood on a sixpence than alcohol, drugs and music combined (as any man who has had to wait while his partner refuses to come out of the bedroom because nothing fits will testify). We not only judge others, but we allow what were wearing to dictate how we ourselves behave: Im still in my pajamas at 2pm, I must be a slob; I have found the perfect pair of trousers, all is right with the world. Last week GQ launched its best-dressed-men list. My first reaction was a snort of derision. Possibly because I didnt agree with the number one - Rio Ferdinand (no man who wears his collar up can ever truly be regarded as well dressed); or perhaps because I think these lists should be renamed best-dressed famous people; or maybe it is because GQ is always such a disappointment as a mens magazine - way too much analysis, not enough pictures of greased-up women with their arms above their head. Such lists are further annoying because they will never acknowledge that my Parisian-by-abode uncle, Vittorio, is the most stylish man on earth. He invented the tone-on-tone look (shirt, suit, tie, socks, sometimes even shoes, the same color) now copied by men of style partout. My uncle was wearing Christian Dior years before it got trendy - in fact when the label was being railed against by Sir Stafford Cripps, the president of the British Board of Trade at the time of the new look after the war, for being wasteful. And no mens magazine had to tell my uncle that you didnt have to be gay to wear cashmere. However, when Id finished snorting, I realized that it was good that dressing well was, for once, being celebrated. Why it is that fashion is generally regarded as so unimportant and flippant? We clearly regard fashion as a shameful mistress, for we deny her constantly. I never tell people what I do, a fashion editor once said, because after that I cant comment on anything else without them thinking Yes dear, yet when people find out, the conversation always turns round to fashion, and everyone twitches uncomfortably. I second this, having once brought a high-level political dinner to a standstill by introducing the subject of mens underpants, specifically boxers v other types. I left two hours later with all talk of the third way forgotten, but the phrase any man who says boxer shorts are comfortable is a liar ringing among the wood paneling. Clothes are more important, at least initially, than education, where we live, what we drive, how we vote, our religion. I dont mean having the latest thing - fashion has a trivial side that must be regularly ridiculed - I mean as a means of looking at and judging a person; because, unless you are visually impaired, we all do this to some extent. Anthropologists call it tribal identification. We look for identifiers that make us think a person is all right (the suit) or possibly a threat (hooded top, fat girl with midriff on show and a look of love in her eye). If we dont look right, we may never get the chance to show a keen wit and cohesion of thought as taut as one of Deirdre Barlows neck veins. But if we do look right, lack of these can be overlooked - why do you think politicians always wear suits? Cultures that seek to enforce behavior know that one of the most effective ways is to dictate what people wear. Take the collar - silly bit of annoying fabric round the neck? For 500 years its been a prime way for a man to show he doesnt need to work, ergo is better than his contemporaries. When he was alive, Charles Dickens was frequently judged not on his fine mind, but the excess spill of his tie - he favored the waterfall cravat, which he would barely tame with diamond pins. He was described as luxuriant and gloss
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