哈佛大学幸福课第15课 中英文双语笔记

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羂蒆蒂蕿肄艿莈薈膇蒄蚆蚇袆芇薂蚇罿蒂蒈蚆膁芅蒄蚅芃膈螃蚄羃莃虿蚃肅膆薅蚂膈莂蒁蚁袇膄莇螁羀莀蚅螀肂膃薁蝿芄莈薇螈羄芁蒃螇肆蒇荿螆膈艿蚈螆袈蒅薄螅羀芈蒀袄肃蒃莆袃膅芆蚅袂袅聿蚁袁肇莄薇袀腿膇蒃袀衿莃荿衿羁膅蚇袈肄莁薃羇膆膄葿羆袆荿莅羅羈膂螄羄膀蒇蚀羄节芀薆羃羂蒆蒂蕿肄艿莈薈膇蒄蚆蚇袆芇薂蚇罿蒂蒈蚆膁芅蒄蚅芃膈螃蚄羃莃虿蚃肅膆薅蚂膈莂蒁蚁袇膄莇螁羀莀蚅螀肂膃薁蝿芄莈薇螈羄芁蒃螇肆蒇荿螆膈艿蚈螆袈蒅薄螅羀芈蒀袄肃蒃莆袃膅芆蚅袂袅聿蚁袁肇莄薇袀腿膇蒃袀衿莃荿衿羁膅蚇袈肄莁薃羇膆膄葿羆袆荿莅羅羈膂螄羄膀蒇蚀羄节芀薆羃羂蒆蒂蕿肄艿莈薈膇蒄蚆蚇袆芇薂蚇罿蒂蒈蚆膁芅蒄蚅芃膈螃蚄羃莃虿蚃肅膆薅蚂膈莂蒁蚁袇膄莇螁羀莀蚅螀肂膃薁蝿芄莈薇螈羄芁蒃螇肆蒇荿螆膈艿蚈螆袈蒅薄螅羀芈蒀袄肃蒃莆袃膅芆蚅袂袅聿蚁袁肇莄薇袀腿膇蒃袀衿莃荿衿羁膅蚇袈肄莁薃羇膆膄葿羆袆荿莅羅羈膂螄羄膀蒇蚀羄节芀薆羃羂蒆蒂蕿肄艿莈薈膇蒄蚆蚇袆芇薂蚇罿蒂蒈蚆膁芅蒄蚅芃膈螃蚄羃莃虿蚃肅膆薅蚂膈莂蒁蚁袇膄莇螁芁蚁羇羁莃蒄袃羀蒅虿蝿罿膅蒂蚅肈芇蚈薁肈莀蒁衿肇聿蚆袅肆节蕿螁肅莄螄蚇肄蒆薇羆肃膆莀袂肂芈薅螈膂莁莈蚄膁肀薄薀膀膃莇羈腿莅蚂袄膈蒇蒅螀膇膇蚀蚆膇艿蒃羅芆莁虿袁芅蒄蒁螇芄膃蚇蚃袀莆蒀虿袀蒈螅羈衿膈薈袄袈芀螄螀袇莂薆蚆袆蒅荿羄羅膄薅袀羄芇莇螆羄葿薃螂羃腿蒆蚈羂芁蚁羇羁莃蒄袃羀蒅虿蝿罿膅蒂蚅肈芇蚈薁肈莀蒁衿肇聿蚆袅肆节蕿螁肅莄螄蚇肄蒆薇羆肃膆莀袂肂芈薅螈膂莁莈蚄膁肀薄薀膀膃莇羈腿莅蚂袄膈蒇蒅螀膇膇蚀蚆膇艿蒃羅芆莁虿袁芅蒄蒁螇芄膃蚇蚃袀莆蒀虿袀蒈螅羈衿膈薈袄袈芀螄螀袇莂薆蚆袆蒅荿羄羅膄薅袀羄芇莇螆羄葿薃螂羃腿蒆蚈羂芁蚁羇羁莃蒄袃羀蒅虿蝿罿膅蒂蚅肈芇蚈薁肈莀蒁衿肇聿蚆袅肆节蕿螁肅莄螄蚇肄蒆薇羆肃膆莀袂肂芈薅螈膂莁莈蚄膁肀薄薀膀膃莇羈腿莅蚂袄膈蒇蒅螀膇膇蚀蚆膇艿蒃羅芆莁虿袁芅蒄蒁螇芄膃蚇蚃袀莆蒀虿袀蒈螅羈衿膈薈袄袈芀螄螀袇莂薆蚆袆蒅荿羄羅膄薅袀羄芇莇螆羄葿薃螂羃腿蒆蚈羂芁蚁羇羁莃蒄袃羀蒅虿蝿罿膅蒂蚅肈芇蚈薁肈莀蒁衿肇聿蚆袅肆节蕿螁肅莄螄蚇肄蒆薇羆肃膆莀袂肂芈薅螈膂莁莈蚄膁肀薄薀膀膃莇羈腿莅蚂袄膈蒇蒅螀膇膇蚀蚆膇艿蒃羅芆莁虿袁芅蒄蒁螇芄膃蚇蚃袀莆蒀虿袀蒈螅羈衿膈薈袄袈芀螄螀袇莂薆蚆袆蒅荿羄羅膄薅袀羄芇莇螆羄葿薃螂羃腿蒆蚈羂芁蚁羇羁莃蒄袃羀蒅虿蝿罿膅蒂蚅肈芇蚈薁肈莀蒁衿肇聿蚆袅肆节蕿螁肅莄螄蚇肄蒆薇羆肃膆莀袂肂芈薅螈膂莁莈蚄膁肀薄薀膀膃莇羈腿莅蚂袄膈蒇蒅螀膇膇蚀蚆膇艿蒃羅芆莁虿袁芅蒄蒁螇芄膃蚇蚃袀莆蒀虿袀蒈螅羈衿膈薈袄袈芀螄螀袇莂薆蚆袆蒅荿羄羅膄薅袀羄芇莇螆羄葿薃螂羃腿蒆蚈羂芁蚁羇羁莃蒄袃羀蒅虿蝿罿膅蒂蚅肈芇蚈薁肈莀蒁衿肇聿蚆袅肆节蕿螁肅莄螄蚇肄蒆薇羆肃膆莀袂LESSON15STUDENTHELLOLASTLECTUREWELEARNEDABOUTRECOVERY大家好上节课我们学到了休整ATTIME,AWAYFROMWORKREALLYRELAX,IDLIKETOINVITEYOUTOJOINA时不时地工作放松一下自己我想邀请你们参加一项TRADITIONALANDTIMETESTEDRECOVERYPERIOD,SHIVA,THEJEWISHSABBATH传统并且有历史渊源的休整节日犹太安息日THISFRIDAYNIGHT,HOWARDHILLANDHERVATATHARVARDINVITEYOUANDYOUR这周星期五哈佛的HOWARDHILL和HERVAT将邀请大家FRIENDSTOSHIVADINNERATTHEMACFORSHIVA1000COMEFORFREEDINNER来MAC中心享用犹太安息日大餐ATTHEDECKDOWNMACWITHALLOFYOURFRIENDS,WHEREOURVERY欢迎来到MAC中心的露天平台和你的朋友一起OWNPROFESSORTALBENSHAHERWILLBESPEAKINGDOORSAREOPEN我们的TALBENSHAHER教授将会发表讲话中心将于六点半开门AT630,ANDDINNERSTARTSAT7PLEASERSVPFORTHISREALLYFUN晚餐七点开始想要参加的请迅速在SHIVAEVENTATSHIVA1000ORGEVERYONEISINVITED,SOPLEASESIGN1000ORG上回复UP欢迎所有人都前来。DRTALBENSHAHARHI,GOODMORNINGIWASALSOASKEDTOANNOUNCEONBEHALFOF早上好我还被要求踢女子垒球队通知大家THEWOMENSOFTBALLTEAMTHEYWOULDVEBEENHEREANDTHEY她们原本是要来这里通知大家的WOULDVEANNOUNCEDTHEMSELVES,BUTTHEYAREATTHEGAMEAND但是她们现在正在进行一THATWASDELAYEDTHERESAGAMETHISSUNDAYANDSATURDAY,场被推迟的比赛这周六和周日都有比赛SATURDAYANDSUNDAYANDALSOFORTHEMENSBASEBALLTEAMSO还有男子棒球队COMEOUTANDCHEERANDONEMOREANNOUNCEMENTTHEYCANT所以请去为他们欢呼还有一个通知HEARSORRYYEAHYEAHALLRIGHT,SOMAY21,915DAYFOR好的五月二十一号九点十五分是决赛THEFINALUMHOPEYOUCANMAKEIT希望你们可以参加OKITSAMONDAYALLRIGHTSOEVERYYEARWHENITEACHTHE好的今天是星期一对当我每年上完美主义的课PERFECTIONISMLECTURE,SOMETHINGHAPPENED,SOTHEFIRSTYEAR,I总有些事会发生在第一年REMEMBERIACTUALLYFORGOTMYCOMPUTERATHOME,SECONDTIME,我记得我把电脑落在家里了第二次THEPROJECTORDIDNTWORKANDTHISYEARIFORGOTMYPOWER,MY投影机坏了今年我把电脑的电源线落在家里了POWERFORTHECOMPUTERATHOMESOHOPEFULLYITWILLLASTTHE所以希望这点电能支持一个学期ENTIRESEMESTER,IFNOTWELLJUSTHAVETODEALWITHTHEIMPERFECT如果不行的话我们就只能面对不完美了SCENARIO,BUTTHATSOKITHINKITMUSTBESOMETHING但那没有关系我想这是潜意识的问题SUBCONSCIOUS,BECAUSEITSTOOMUCHOFACOINCIDENCETHATEVERY因为这也太巧合了TIMESOMETHINGHAPPENS,WALKTHETALKSOWHEREWEREWELAST每次都发生这些事情的确是这样那么我们上次讲到哪了呢TIMELASTTIMEWETALKEDABOUTHOWYOULEARNEDHOWTOWALK上次我们讲到了你们是怎么学会走路的WELEARNEDABOUTHOWYOULEARNEDTODRAWCIRCLESANDALL我们讲到了你们是怎么学会画圆圈的都是通过THROUGHFAILUREASTHOMASEDISONSAID,“ILEARNEDMYWAYI不断的失败正如爱迪生所说我通过不断的失败以FAILEDMYWAYTOSUCCESS,”ANDWESAWITWITHTOPATHLETES,至成功我们从那些顶尖的运动员身上WHETHERITWASBABERUTHORMICHAELJORDANWESAWITWITHTOP看到不管是BABERUTH还是MICHAELJORDAN我们从那些最BUSINESSPEOPLE,WHETHERITWASTHOMASWATSON,IBMORANITA顶尖的商人身上看到不管是IBM的创始人THOMASWATSONRIDDICK,FOUNDEROFTHE,OFBODYSHOP,WESEEITWITHARTISTANDANITARIDDICK美体小铺的创始人我们从艺术家和科学家SCIENTIST,THEMOSTSUCCESSFULONESAREALSOTHEONESWHOFAILED身上看到那些最成功的同样也是失败最多的人THEMOST,ANDTHESEARETHEONESWHOUNDERSTANDTHEVALUEAND而他们就是那些深刻明白失败的价值与重要性的人THEIMPORTANCEOFFAILUREIGUARANTEEYOUTHENNONEOFTHEM我向你保证他们没人喜欢失败ENJOYFAILINGFAILINGHURTSITSDISAPPOINTINGATBESTITS失败让人受伤让人极度失望让人沮丧FUSTRATINGITSEMBARRASSINGOFTENHOWEVER,PEOPLEWHO经常使人尴尬但是那些ULTIMATELYSUCCEEDRECOGNIZETHATVALUEOFFAILUREANDLEARNING最为成功的人都会认识到失败并从失败中学习价值FROMITTHERESAWONDERFULBOOKTHATCAMEOUTRECENTLYBYONE有一本很有趣的书是由我的一位导师最近完成的OFMYMENTORSHETAUGHTATTHEBUSINESSSCHOOLFORAFEWYEARS他在商学院教了几年书HEISAPROFESSORATUNIVERSITYOFSOUTHERNCALIFORNIAWARREN他是个教授在南加州大学任职WARRENBENNNISANDWARRENBENNISWROTEABOOK,WHICHISCALLEDBENNNIS他写了本书叫做“GEEKANDGEEZERS”ANDINTHEBOOK,HECOMPAREDVERY极客与怪杰在这本书中SUCCESSFULLEADERSWHOWEREYOUNG,EARLY30SANDOLDER他将非常年轻的顶多30出头的GENERATIONLEADERS,PEOPLEWHOHAVEREALLYMADEIT,BIGTIME年轻的成功人士和老一代真正有所成就的划时代领袖人物LEADERSWHOARENOWINTHEIR70SAND80S,SOMETIMES90SAND他们大多在七十岁八十岁甚至九十岁以上HECOMPAREDTHESETWOGROUPSTHEGEEKSTHEYOUNGONESTHE他将两组人对比极客指那些年轻的GEEZERS,THEOLDERONESANDWHATHEFOUNDWASTHATTHEREWEREA怪杰指那些年长的而他发现有一些非常有趣同时也NUMBEROFVERYINTERESTINGANDMEANINGFULDIFFERENCESBETWEEN很有意义的差异THEGENERATIONSOFAGAINHIGHLYSUCCESSFULLATE20SEARLY30YEARS存在于年轻的二十多到三十出头的成功人OLDANDHIGHLYSUCCESSFULOLDERINDIVIDUALSONEOFTHEMOST和年长的成功的领袖人物之间其中最明显的NOTABLEDIFFERENCESWASTHATWORKWORKLIFEBALANCE,WHICHIS差异就是工作和生活的平衡VERYIMPORTANTFORTHELATE20S,EARLY30SVERYIMPORTANTTHEY对于年轻的成功人士来说非常重要非常重要他们TALKEDABOUTITCONSTANTLY,WHEREASFORTHE708090YEAROLDS,IT也经常谈论这个但对于老一代的成功人士那里WASALMOSTAFOREIGNCONCEPTWHATDOESTHATEVENMEANWHY这几乎是一个外来的概念这是什么意为什么会这样BECAUSETHEYWEREATWORKUSUALLY24/7ALLOFTHEMINTHAT因为他们总是处于工作中所有的样本中都是SAMPLEWEREMENANDWOMENWEREATHOME,TAKINGCAREOFTHE男性而女性则待在家里负责生活的部分LIFEPARTSOTHEREWASAWORKLIFEBALANCEWHERETHEYWERE所以说他们的工作与生活的平衡是DOINGTHEWORK,THEWIVESWEREDOINGTHELIFEWHEREASTHE丈夫负责工作妻子负责照顾生活在年轻成功YOUNGERGENERATION,MENANDWOMENINTHATSAMPLEANDTALKING人士的样本里男女都有他们自然ABOUTTHEWORKLIFEBALANCETHEREAREAFEWOTHERDIFFERENCESAS谈到工作和生活的平衡两代人之间有所不同WELL,BUTTHEREISONESIMILARITY,ONETHINGTHATWASCOMMONTO但是有一个相同点这一点对两代人来说是一一样的BOTHGROUPSANDTHATWASATLEASTONE,USUALLYMORETHANONE那就是有至少一次一般来说要多与一次的SIGNIFICANTFAILURE,USUALLYMORETHANONESIGNIFICANTFAILURE,显著的失败WHATWARRENBENNISCAMETOCALL“ACRUCIBLE”,AREALCRISISWARRENBENNIS称其为“考验”一次灾难WHETHERITWASAMEANINGFULLOSSORLOSINGAJOBBEINGFIRED,无论是重要的竞争失败或者失去工作ONGESIDENTITYBEINGINSULTED,LOSSOFAPERSONSOMEREAL还是受到了屈辱失去亲人一些SERIOUSCRUCIBLE,AFAILURETHATWASCOMMONTOBOTHGROUP,AND严重的考验一次失败的经历那是两代人共同拥有的BOTHGROUPSTHOUGHTTHATFAILUREASAPIVOTALPOINT,ASATURNING他们把失败看作一个关键点POINTINTHEIRLIVES,SOMETHINGTHATHELPEDTHEMBECOMEWHO一个生活的转折点一些帮助造就今天的他们的因素THEYARETODAYAGAIN,NOTSAYINGITHAPPENEDFORTHEBEST,BUT再说一遍我不是说已经发生的是好事THEYWEREABLETOMAKETHEBESTOFTHATWHICHHAPPENEDNOW而是他们能够好好利用已经发生的事MOSTPEOPLEEXPERIENCECRUCIBLES,THROUGHOUTTHEIRLIVES,每个人都会经历考验都会面临困难和阻碍HARDSHIPS,DIFFICULTIES,BUTDIFFERENCEBETWEENTHEHIGHLY但是那些极度SUCCESSFULPEOPLE,FOREXAMPLETHESAMPLEINWARRENBENNISS成功的人比如说WARRENBENNISBOOKANDMANYOTHERPEOPLEISTHATTHEYAREABLETOMAKETHE书里写道的那些人和一般人的不同之处在于他们能够好好BESTOFWHATHAPPENSTHEYSEEITASANOPPORTUNITY,ALEARNING利用已经发生的事他们将这些事情看成机遇EXPERIENCE,STEPPINGSTONETHEIMPORTANCEOFFAILUREFOR一种学习经历一块垫脚石这就是失败对于适应力与完善RESILIENCE,FORWELLBEINGASWELLSOLETMEMOVEONANDDEFINE人格的作用我们继续谈下完美主义WHATWEMEANBYPERFECTIONISMBECAUSETHEREAREMANY因为现在有很多定义DEFINITIONSANDWETHROWTHATWORDAROUNDCONSTANTLYBUTWHAT我们经常谈到这个词但是DOIACTUALLYMEANBYPERFECTIONISMIDEFINEITASAN什么是我们所说的完美主义我的定义是INCAPACITATINGFEAROFFAILURETHATPERMEATESOURLIVERS,ESPECIALLY一种充斥在我们生活中的对失败的失能性恐惧尤其是在THOSEAREASTHATWECAREABOUTMOSTNOTETHEWORD我们最在意的方面注意INCAPACITATING,ITISNOTJUSTAFEAROFFAILUREOKIDONTKNOWA“失能性”这个词不是只对失败的恐惧好吧我也不认识PERSONWHOISNOTAFRAIDOFFAILURE,WHOISNOTEMBARRASSEDBYIT哪怕一个不害怕失败的也不会因为失败感到尴尬ORFEELSFRUSTRATEDBYITSOTHATSNATURALTHATSHUMANWHETHER或者沮丧的人这是很自然的这就是人性WELIKEITORNOTBUTANINCAOACITATINGFEAROFFAILUREISTHE不管我们喜不喜欢但对于失败的失能性畏惧是FAILURETHATISDEBILITATINGUS,THATSTOPSUS,THATPREVENTSUSFROM一种让我们面对问题的时候裹足不前的畏惧COPING,FROMTRYING,FROMPUTTINGOURSELVESONTHELINEANDTHE而我OTHERPARTOTHERPARTTHATIWANTTOHIGHLIGHTINTHISDEFINITIONIS要在这个定义里强调的另一点就是THAT“ESPECIALLYTHOSEAREASTHATWECAREABOUTTHATWECAREABOUT“尤其是我们最在意的方面”MOST”YOUKNOW,IAMNOTAPERFECTIONSITWHENITCOMESTO你们也明白我在玩大富翁的时候可不是完美主义PLAYINGMONOPOLY,ITISCOMPETITIVE,BUTITSNOTTHATIMPORTANT这的确有竞争性但对于我来FORMEIFIWINORLOSSBUTPERFECTIONISMWASACENTRALPARTOF说胜败并不重要但是完美主义确是我生活的重心MYLIFEWHENITCAMETOASIMENTIONEDEARLIER,SQUASHWHICH就如同我提到过的壁球对我WASVERYMEANINGFULTOMEACADEMICSWHICHISVERYMEANINGFUL而言非常重要学术对我来说非常重要TOME,ANDRELATIONSHIPSWHICHWASANDISAVERYIMPORTANTPART和别人的关系对我来说非常重要OFMYLIFESOINTHESEAREAS,THATSWHEREIEXPERIENCED在这方面我体会倒了完美主义PERFECTIONISM,ANDTHATSWHEREINEEDEDTODOTHEWORKANDSTILL也是在这些方面我必须并且一直在努力THEWORKITSINTHOSEAREASLETMEELABORATEONTHISDEFINITION在这些方面让我详细