陕西省2016年高考英语命题作文写作技巧

WritingSkillsTeachinggoals

-----教学目标HowtomakeanoutlineHowtopickoutimportantpointsHowtowritebeautifulsentencesHowtoorganizethesentenceslogically假设你是李华,你购买了一部某外国公司生产的手机.因有质量问题,要求该公司更换.请根据下列要点,用英文写一封电子邮件.1.问题:手机不响铃,不能发短信;该产品已售完,无法更换;型号新,无配件,无法维修.2.要求:公司应尽快予以更换.注意:1.词数为120左右;2.参考词汇:配件(sparepart)Thestyle:

exposition（说明文）Themainidea:PresenttheproblemswiththephoneandaskforachangePerson:

thefirstperson第一人称Tense:thepresenttense

现在式

andthepasttense过去式Task1Examinethecontentcarefully

Task2提炼要点,确定重点词汇,划分段落Importantpoints：threeproblemsplus

onedemand要点：三个问题加一个要求Point1:

notring;notsendmessagesPoint2：soldout;notchange…for…

或notexchange…for…或notreplace…with…

Point3：

newmodel;nospareparts;repair/fix/maintain

Point4：

require/requestsb.todosth

或demandofsb.todosth.Task3连词成句1.手机不响铃,不能发短信

Itdoesn’tring.Itdoesn’tsendshortmessages.2.该产品已售完,无法更换

Themodelhasbeensoldout.Theycan’tchangeanewoneforme.3.型号新,无配件,无法维修

ItisanewmodelinChina.Itisimpossibletofixitwithouttherightspareparts.4.要求公司应尽快予以更换

Idemandof/require/requestyourcompanytochangeanewoneformeassoonaspossible.Task4

提升句子，组句成篇注意：灵活运用好句式一.使用非谓语动词(nonfiniteverb)使句子简洁高档二.巧用倒装(inversion)结构增强句子的表现力三.尝试多样化表达方式,如：

1.感叹句(theexclamatory)2.with短语

3.定语从句(theattributiveclause)

4.各种名词性从句5.各种状语从句(theadverbialclause)1.手机不响铃,不能发短信整合前：Itdoesn’tring.Itdoesn’tsendshortmessages.整合后：可以造至少两个并列句(or,meanwhile,either)a.Itcan’tringorsendshortmessages.b.Itdoesn’tringatallandmeanwhileitdoesn’tsendshortmessages.（Neither….nor句式）c.Itcanneitherringnorsendshortmessages.可造至少两个倒装句式（notonly…butalso,nor,neither

）d.Notonlydoesitfailtoring,butalsoitcan’tsendamessage.e.Themobilephonecan’tring,

norcanitsendmessages.2.该产品已售完,无法更换整合前：Themodelhasbeensoldout.Theycan’tchangeanewoneforme.整合后：a.Thenewmodelhasbeensoldout

sothat

theycan’tchangeanewoneforme.b.Themodelhasbeensoldout,

asa

consequence,

it’simpossibleforthemtochangeanewoneforme.(非限制性定语从句nonfiniteattributiveclause)c.Themodelhasbeensoldout,whichmakesitimpossibleformetohaveanewone.（主语从句）d.Thefactthatthemodelhasbeensoldoutmakesmeunabletochangeit.（结果状语从句至少两个sothat，asaconsequence/result）3.型号新,无配件,无法维修整合前：ItisanewmodelinChina.Itisimpossibletofixitwithouttherightspareparts.整合后：a.Since

it’sanewmodel

andthere’renospareparts,Ican’tgetitrepaired

.b.Sonewisitstype

withoutanysparepartsthatIcan’tgetitrepaired.c.With

itsnewtypeandnosparepartsleft,

Ifindithardtohaveitrepaired.原因状语从句because，since，as和倒装句各一个so…thatwith结构一个

4.要求公司应尽快予以更换整合前：Irequire/requestyourcompanytochangeanewoneformeassoonaspossible.整合后：

宾语从句Toconclude,I

demand/require/requestthat

yourcompany

should

havemyphonechangedassoonaspossible.

用appreciateitifB.I’dreallyappreciateitif

youcouldreplaceitsoon.

包含宾语从句、同位语从句、虚拟语气及被动语态的句子C.Ihopethat

myrequirement

that

you

should

changeanewphoneofthesamemodelformecan

besatisfied

assoonaspossible.5.检查誊写仔细誊写，保证字迹工整，卷面整洁。Whichoneispreferred?DearSir,

……Tendaysafterthat,itdidn’tringorsendshortmessages.ThenItookittotheseller,but

wastoldthatthemodelhadbeensoldoutand

Ihadtowaitatleastthreemonthsforanewone.LaterIwenttotherepairman.Hesaidsinceitwasanew-modelinChina,itwasimpossibletofixitwithouttherightspareparts.Iwassodesperateonhearingthat.HowcanIwaitthatlong?

Therefore,Irequirethatyousendmeanewoneofthesamemodelwithinamonth.

Thankyouforyourconsideration.

Yours,