高三英语二轮读后续写下水作文讲义

高三二轮读后续写下水作文讲义阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。Thefirsttimeweseteyeson“Big

Red”,father,motherandIwereonourwayhome.AswepassedtheEaton's

departmentstore'swindow,westoppedasusualtohavealookanddoabitof

dreaming.Thebeautifullydecoratedwindow

displayheldthebesttoysever.Thereweredollsmuchtooprettytoplaywith.

Andtheyalllaybeneathasurprisinglyfantasticdress.Mother'seyeswere

gluedtoitsshiningredsatin（缎子）.“Mygoodness,”shewhispered.“Look,at

that!”Then,motherlookeddownatherowncoat-shehadworntheheavygrey

woolcoateverywinterforaslongasIcouldremember.Momwasforeverdoing

chores-washinglaundry,tendingthepigsandworkinginthegarden-soshe

alwaysworehousedressesandanapron（围裙）toprotectthefront.Shedidhaveoneortwo“special”

dressessavedforchurchonSundays.Also,shemanagedtomakealmostallof

ourclothes.Theyweren'tfancy,buttheywerecomfortable.“Whatasillydress!”Sheshookher

head.“Whoonearthwouldwantsuchabigdress?”Aswecontinueddownthe

street,motherturnedherheadforonemorelook.“Mygoodness!You'dthink

they'ddisplaysomethingapersoncoulduse!”Mother'sDaywasnearing,andthered

dresswassoonforgotten.Mother,ofallpeople,wasnotonetospendmoneyon

itemsthatwerenotpractical.“Therearethingsweneedmorethanthis.”She’d

alwayssay.ChoosingagiftforMother'sDayforherwasquitehard.WhenDad

andIasked,shethoughtcarefullythenaskedforsometeatowels,facecloths

oranewbasin.Onourlasttriptotownbefore

Mother'sDay,weweredrivingupMainStreetwhenMothersuddenlyshoutedin

surprise:“Look!”ShepointedexcitedlyasDaddrovepastEaton's.“Thatbig

reddressisgone,”shesaidindisbelief.“Who'dbefoolenoughtobuysucha

dress?”Motherquestioned，shakingherhead.IwasalmostcertainthatInoticedatrace

oflonging（一丝渴望）inhervoice.注意：1．续写词数应为150左右；2．请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。OnthemorningofMother'sDay,Mothergot

alargeboxthatread“Eaton'sFinestBasin”onitswrappingpaper.“OhFrank...”Shechokedupandcouldn't

sayaword,tearswellingupinhereyes.文章大意：这是一篇典型的描写家庭关系的记叙文。作者“我”从家中的孩子的视角（第一人称叙事），讲述了爸爸为勤劳俭朴的妈妈悄悄购买她喜欢的红色连衣裙，并当作母亲节礼物送给她的家庭生活故事。文本分析：1.确定故事结局：

幸福感人的结局2.确定主要人物：

妈妈和爸爸3.确定写作视角：“我”家中的孩子（事件的经历者）语言积累：急切打开礼物Sheeagerlyunwrappedtheboxandopenedit.惊讶

Tohersurprise,itwasnota

basin,butthebeautiful

reddress

shehadadmiredinthe

Eaton’sdepartmentstore

window.Shegasped,speechless,runningherfingersoverthesoft

satin

fabric."Ican'tbelieveit!"Momexclaimed.我和爸爸的祝贺Dad

winkedatme,（爸爸的小表情）

andIknewthathehadgonetogreatlengthstogetthisdressfor

Mom."HappyMother'sDaymydarling"Dadsaid,givingherakiss.

妈妈感动MomwasspeechlessandInoticedthathereyeswerefilledwithtearsofjoy.妈妈的感谢MomhuggedDadtightly,andIsawtearsstreamingdownhercheeks."Thankyou,Frank,"shewhispered."You'rethebesthusbandandfatherintheworld."结尾句IrealizedthatthiswasthebestgiftMomhadeverreceived.Andwiththat,weallhugged,baskinginthewarmthofourfamily'slove.范文：OnthemorningofMother'sDay,Mothergot

alargeboxthatread“Eaton'sFinestBasin”onitswrappingpaper.

"OhFrank,"shepraised,"justwhatIwanted!"Dadwassittinginhisrocker,ahugegrinonhisface.

"Onlyafoolwouldn'tgiveapricelesswifelikemineexactlywhatshewantsfor

Mother'sDay,"helaughed."Goahead,openitupandmakesuretherearenochips."Dadwinkedatme,confirminghissecret,andmyheartfilledwithmoreloveformyfatherthanIthoughtitcouldhold!

Motheropenedtheboxtofindabigwhiteenameldishpan-overflowingwithcrimsonsatinthatspilledoutacrossherlap.WithtremblinghandsshetouchedtheelegantmaterialofBigRed.“OhFrank...”Shechokedupandcouldn't

sayaword,tearswellingupinhereyes.

Herfacewasasbrightasthestarthattwinkledonourtreeinthecornerofthesmallroom."Youshouldn'thave..."cameherfaintattemptatscolding.

"Ohnow,nevermindthat!"Dadsaid."Let'sseeifitfits,"helaughed,helpingherslipthemarvellousdressoverhershoulders.Astheshimmeringredsatinfellaroundher,itgracefullyhidthepatchedandfadedfloralhousedressunderneath.

Iwatched,mymouthagape,captivatedbyaradianceinmyparentsIhadnevernoticedbefore.Astheywaltzedaroundtheroom,BigRedswirleditsmagicdeepintomyheart.

"Youlookbeautiful,"mydadwhisperedtomymom-andshesurelydid!续写原文&细节分析

Iwasinvitedtoacookoutonanoldfriend’sfarminwesternWashington.Iparkedmycaroutsidethefarmandwalkedpastamilkinghousewhichhadapparentlynotbeenusedinmanyyears.Anoiseatawindowcaughtmyattention,soIenteredit.Itwasahummingbird(蜂鸟),desperatelytryingtoescape.Shewascoveredinspider-webs(蛛网)andwasbarelyabletomoveherwings.SheceasedherstruggletheinstantIpickedherup.

Withthebirdinmycuppedhand,Ilookedaroundtoseehowshehadgottenin.Thebrokenwindowglasswasthelikelyanswer.Istuffedapieceofclothintotheholeandtookheroutside,closingthedoorsecurelybehindme.细节分析1：mainplot:

我去好友的农场野炊，路遇一只误入牛奶房然后被蛛网困住的蜂鸟，我救了她。maincharacters:

I,thehummingbird(she),myoldfriendswhere:myold

friend’sfarminwestWashington,amilkinghousewithabrokenwindowglassThecharacterof“I”:

细心，有爱心

WhenIopenedmyhand,thebirddidnotflyaway;shesatlookingatmewithherbrighteyes.Iremovedthestickyspider-websthatcoveredherheadandwings.Still,shemadenoattempttofly.Perhapsshehadbeenstrugglingagainstthewindowtoolongandwastootired?Ortoothirsty?

AsIcarriedheruptheblackberry-linedpathtowardmycarwhereIkeptawaterbottle,shebegantomove.Istopped,andshesoontookwingbutdidnotimmediatelyflyaway.

Hovering(悬停),sheapproachedwithinsixinchesofmyface.Foraverylongmoment,thistinycreaturelookedintomyeyes,turningherheadfromsidetoside.Thensheflewquicklyoutofsight.细节分析2：mainplot:我救出蜂鸟后，她没有立刻飞走，而是停留了一会儿，仔细地看了我一会儿Whydidn’tthebirdflyimmediately?惊魂稍定;记住“我”的样子，好好道别，可能还会再来找“我”，感谢“我”Thecharacterofthehummingbird:聪明，通人性，感恩Place&Time:

Theblackberry-linedpath,summer

Duringthecookout,Itoldmyhostsaboutthehummingbirdincident.Theypromisedtofixthewindow.AsIwasdeparting,myfriendswalkedmetomycar.Iwasstandingbythecarwhenahummingbirdflewtothecenterofourgroupandbeganhovering.Sheturnedfrompersontopersonuntilshecametome.Sheagainlookeddirectlyintomyeyes,thenletoutasqueakingcallandwasgone.Foramoment,allwerespeechless.Thensomeonesaid,“Shemusthavecometosaygoodbye.”细节分析3：mainplot:主人答应修好窗户，“我”离开的时候蜂鸟再出现Whydidthehummingbirdflytofindme?Shemusthavecometosaygoodbye.Paragraph1:Afewweekslater,Iwenttothefarmagain.Paragraph2:Iwasjustabouttoleavewhenthehummingbirdappeared.基于上文、细节分析和段首句，回答下列问题：Q1:Whatmight“I”dothesecondtime“I”wenttothefarm?A1:Tocookoutandtalkwith“my”oldfriendsQ2:Whydidthehummingbirdappearagain?Whatmighthappen?A2:Shemayflytothankmeandinteractwithme.Q3:Whatdetailsinthepassagemightbeechoedinthecontinuouswriting?A3:Whetherthebrokenwindowwasfixed,thedetailedplacesandtime2审题WHEN:

Summer,inthedaytimeWHERE:

themilkinghouse,theblackberry-linedpath,thefarmWHAT:

“我”救了被蛛网困住的蜂鸟，蜂鸟感谢“我”TOPIC:

人与自然主题语境—人帮助小动物，小动物感恩；人和小动物之间的友谊CONFLICT（待解决的问题）:

破窗是否修好了；“我”和蜂鸟的故事怎么继续整理原文中关于蜂鸟的细节描写：出场：Itwasahummingbird(蜂鸟),desperatelytryingtoescape.Shewascoveredinspider-webs(蛛网)andwasbarelyableto

moveherwings.互动：Shesat

lookingatmewithherbrighteyes.

Hovering(悬停),sheapproachedwithinsixinchesofmyface.Thistinycreature

lookedintomyeyes,turningherheadfromsidetoside.Ahummingbirdflewtothecenterofourgroupand

beganhovering.Sheagain

lookeddirectlyintomyeyes,then

letoutasqueakingcall

andwasgone.

(注意看标粗重复出现的表达)3情节框架构建（不唯一）Paragraph1:Afewweekslater,Iwenttothefarmagain.【I】又路过milkinghouse，看到brokenwindow已经被修好了【I】安心地去和朋友们cookout，朋友们提到蜂鸟最近每天都飞来，好像在找我【I】听到的反应，但cookout结束了，我准备离开时蜂鸟却还没出现Paragraph2:Iwasjustabouttoleavewhenthehummingbirdappeared.【hummingbird】出场的描写【I】的反应：开心，感动，和蜂鸟互动，蜂鸟表达感谢【点题】升华主旨：人和自然界小动物的缘分和感情由于篇幅有限，以上分析完文章后，以下重点和大家分享续写第二段中蜂鸟出场的描写和“我”与蜂鸟的互动。【Hummingbird】出场的描写中文句子：伴随着越来越近的翅膀煽动的嗡嗡声，我意识到她来了！我抬头一看，她悬停在我的前方。英文表达：听觉+视觉：蜂鸟的嗡嗡声+蜂鸟的眼睛1.With

afamiliarbuzzingsound声音approaching,Irealizeditwasher!Lookingup,I

sawasmallfigure视觉hoveringintheair原文表达

whose

brighteyes原文表达werefixedonmyface.2.Apparently,thefamiliarandapproachingbuzzingsoundannouncedherappearance.ThemomentIlookedup,asmallfigure

leapedtotheeye映入眼帘.

Thebrighteyes!原文表达

Itwasher!听觉+视觉：蜂鸟煽动翅膀的声音+蜂鸟的眼睛3.Hearing

thefluttering煽动ofwings声音,Ilookeduptoseemylovelylittlefriend

hovering原文表达

nearmewithher

eyes,asbrightasbefore原文表达,fixedonme.Shewassosmallanddelicate,yetfulloflifeandenergy.触觉+听觉+视觉：风吹过+蜂鸟吱吱叫的声音+蜂鸟俯冲过来停在树枝上4.Ifelt

agustofwind一阵风

beforeafamiliarandmerry愉快的squeakingcall原文表达

cameintomyears.Itwasher!NosoonerhadIraisedupmyheadthanatinycreature

swooped俯冲towardsme

and

landedonatwig树枝

justaninchbeforeme.【I】和蜂鸟互动描写场景一：蜂鸟衔了东西回来，和我表达感谢中文句子1：我一看见她就忍不住笑起来。她在我的肩膀上停下，口中衔着一朵茉莉花，我伸出手，她轻轻地把花放在我手心，然后用头蹭了蹭我的脖子，高兴地叫了一声，飞走了。英文表达1：外貌（颜色、形状、标志性器官）+动作（小孩般撒娇的）+特有声音1.Icouldn’tresistsmilingatthesightofher,marvelingat惊叹

hertinybodyandtheiridescentgreen荧光绿ofherfeather.

Shelandedonmyshoulder

withjasmine茉莉花inherbeak喙.

Ireachedoutandshe

dropped

herthank-yougiftinmypalmtenderly,then

rubbed蹭

herheadagainstmyneck.“Goodgirl,nicetoseeyouagain,”Isaid,stroking轻抚hergently.Asifunderstandingmywords,sheletoutahigh-pitched声调高的chirp叽喳声

asaresponse,then

whirred呼呼作声地飞away.场景二：蜂鸟没衔东西回来，和我表达感谢中文句子2：我伸出手，她停在我的手指上。她用同样闪闪发光的眼神看我。我们看着彼此，我感到了我们之间的联系。英文表达2：和动物互动：安静版—对视、感受双方的连接；活动版—聊天、拥抱、抚摸1.Outofecstasy狂喜,Ireachedoutmyfingerforhertorestwhenmytinyfriend

studied仔细看mewiththesamesparklingandpleasanteyes.

Foramoment,wesimplystaredateachother,

enjoyingthequietconnection.总结积累的语料有限时，怎么“糊弄”动物描写？找原文！把原文关于这个动物的细节描写找出来，灵活地运用到自己的写作中。语料积累足够，但怎么把动物写得栩栩如生人见人爱？1.把动物当小朋友写，把小朋友的一些特征行为安排到动物身上。如贪吃、爱撒娇、信任人、傻乎乎地乐呵，但是注意，重点是要搭配ta们美好善良的品质。2.从“五感”的角度写。视觉角度写动物的外貌、听觉角度写动物特有的声音、触觉角度写和动物的拥抱抚摸互动等。下水作文：

Afewweekslater,Iwenttothefa