作文讲解2.doc

假定你是中学生李华。在一位名叫 TigerMom 的学生家长的博客上，你看到如下内容。 请你根据博客内容、 写作要点和要求，给这位家长回复。 Im the mother of a fourteen-year-old. I have a rule for my daughter: be among the top 5 students or get punished in one way or another. She has been doing very well in school, but some friends of mine keep telling me that I put too much pressure on her. Am I wrong? 写作要点： 1.表明自己的看法； 2.陈述自己的理由（可举例说明） ； 3.提出至少两条建议 要求： 1.短文须写在答题卡的指定区域。 2.短文词数不少于 100（不含已写好的部分） 。 3.内容充实，结构完整，语意连贯。 4.书写需清晰、工整。 Hi，TigerMom, What puzzles you is actually a puzzle for many parents in China. My idea is 参考例文： What puzzles you is actually a puzzle for many parents who expect much of their children in China. I cant agree with your opinion that you must be very strict with your daughter. My reasons are as follows.Although high grades are an important factor in evaluating students and their future university admission, development in wisdom, emotion, health, and life attitude should never be ignored. There are many examples around us. Firstly/In the first place, some all-A students in school have turned out not to be as successful in society as they were expected. It is the pressure from their parents that allows them almost no time for other activities. They fail to develop their overall ability while studying in school. Secondly/Furthermore/moreover/whats more/in addition, punishment is by no means a wise choice to help them grow up mentally and physically. Instead, students may suffer a lot of punishment, resulting in losing confidence and interest in study. So/therefore I suggest that you take your friends advice. With the society developing, success of a man attaches much importance to a person EQ rather than IQ. Therefore, youd let her live like a lovely girl. Let her have more friends and social activities. During the process of growth, let her make her own choice as we teenagers often do. Only in this way can children make the most of their mental ability and adapt themselves to the ever-changing and challenging society. 作文写好增分的方法1. 学会使用丰富的句式2. 学会使用较高级词汇3. 学会使用适当的连词一加原则加同位语从句I cant agree with your opinion that you must be very strict with your daughter.加定语从句What puzzles you is actually a puzzle for many parents who expect much of their children in China.二换原则换词汇词汇多变 idea/opinion/point of view/outlookGrades/marks/scores/points Factor/aspect/consideration低级词汇换高级词汇ability-wisdom/intelligence, feeling-emotion,makes-allows judge-evaluate/assess (评估、评价)词汇换短语Some all-A students in school have turned out not to be as successful in society as they were expected.Furthermore, punishment is by no means a wise choice to help them grow up mentally and physically.三变原则（变句型）1. 简单句My reasons are as follows.2. 复合句What puzzles you is actually a puzzle for many parents in china.3. 状语提前During the process of growth, let her make her own choice as we teenagers often do.4. 长短句交替最后一段5. it句型（包括强调句型）It is the pressure from their parents that allows them almost no time for other activities.6. 主动/被动 - ，development in wisdom, emotion, health, and life attitude should never be ignored.7. 非谓语动词Instead, students may suffer a lot from the punishment, resulting in losing and confidence and interest in study.8. 倒装句型Only in this way can children make the most of their mental ability and adapt themselves to the ever-changing and challenging society.9. with复合结构With the society developing , success of a man attaches much importance to a person EQ rather than IQ.10. 虚拟语气I suggest that you take your friends advice. 11. 省略句型They fail to develop their overall ability while studying in school.12. 独立主格结构Children performing badly, parents shout at them.四注意连贯和衔接因果：because, as, for this reason, as a result, so转折: on the contrary, while,but,however, otherwise条件: so/as long as, in case, if , unless, suppose时间: first, at last, soon, immediately, the moment 列举: first(ly), second(ly), for one thing,递进: whats more, besides, furthermore目的: so that, in order that, for the purpose总结: in a word, on the whole, all in all, in general五写好开头和结尾What puzzles you is actually a puzzle for many parents in China. My idea is that it is not quite right for you to do so. Although high grades are an important factor in evaluating students and their future university admission, development in wisdom, emotion, health, and life attitude should never be ignored. There are many examples around us. Some all-A students in school have turned out not to be as successful in society as they were expected. The reason is often that the pressure from their parents allows them almost no time for other activities. Furthermore, punishment is by no means a wise choice to help t