英语搞笑小品剧本

Characters Narrator N Salesman S Dad D Maggie M Alice A Candy C Policeman P Preparation 学校布景 做糖果用桌及相关材料 小贩家布景 Scene1 At Salesman s home N In a dark dirty house there lived a small dirty salesman He always makes unhealthy candies and sells them to the students He has a lot of money now But how does he make the candies Oh xu He is coming S Hello do you know me No Oh let me tell you I m the famous candy salesman at the school gate My candies are very popular 展示 I don t know why The foolish students always come here I ll be a boss soon Candy money candy money Oops It s time to make candies now 看表 First put the flour on the table Then water sugar flour 边说边做 Now press press Oh my dirty hands Never mind Just do it 满不在意的神情 Press press Oh my god 鼻涕 Never mind Just do it Press press the children will not know it it s OK hehehe Now let me cut it into pieces One two three four five 用脏菜刀 Wow everything is ready 糖果钻出来 跳舞 跳完后 非常难过地说 Oh I m so dirty and ugly What can I do The students will eat me And they will be ill Wuwuwu S Mmmm It looks dirty let me give you a nice coat 给它穿上 Wow Now it s so beautiful Haha C Oh no Don t sell me I m dirty 拖糖果下场 Scene2 At the school gate N The next day when the class is over all the students come out happily and the salesman goes to the school gate as usual Maggie 和 Alice 欢快地跑出校门 看到小贩 小贩拉着糖上场 吆喝 Candies Candies Sweet candies M Oh Alice Look Candies A Yeah I think they are yummy M Let s ask him A OK C Don t buy me 非常焦急 M A Why C I m dirty M No you look nice C What can I do 面向观众 Wuwuwu 小贩将她拉在后面 S Candies Candies 引诱两个女孩 M A How much are they S Do you have money 轻蔑 M A Money 对视 M Oh I ve no money 失落之极 A Me too S No money So sorry 吆喝着走开 下场 M What can we do now A Let s ask dad for money M But how to ask A How Oh I know let s make him happy and he will give us money 自信 M Good idea 全部下场 Scene 3 At Maggie s home N The children have to go home and ask dad for some money and they know their father is good at playing guitar so they will do something clever 爸爸看报 M Dad dad let s sing a song OK 同时 Alice 去取吉他准备拿给爸爸 A And play the guitar for us M We know you play so well 爸爸诧异地看着孩子 D Oh What a bright day today M A Please dad 哀求 D OKOK Let s 取吉他 开始准备 D Which song do you like How about Edelweiss M A Of course 开始弹 第一段孩子随节奏起舞 第二段孩子开始轻声讨论起来 you first 之类的话 爸爸停止弹琴 D What s the matter M Dad we have no money A Can we have some please D I think you have lots of pocket money and you don t need any more M I want to buy some candies at the school gate A They look so sweet and nice M Other students always buy them D But You can t They are quite unhealthy Please go and do your homework 置之不理 转头看报 孩子回到房间 M What shall we do now A Let me think well I know 轻声在 Maggie 耳边说 M Oh you are so clever Let s go 回到爸爸身边 M Dad I want a new eraser A I want a longer ruler M A Dad please D Things are expensive these days We have to save money M But dad my eraser is too small now 拿出破橡皮来给爸爸看 A And my ruler is broken 拿出断尺 D OK children I believe you this time make sure don t buy the food at the school gate It s unhealthy Do you know M A Yes sir D Here you are 给钱 M A Thanks very much dad Bye 非常高兴 下场 N The next day when the class is over Maggie and Alice come to the salesman again They are happy to buy the candies and then have them but soon they feel a stomachache 孩子高兴地买了糖 边吃边回家 小贩下场 孩子到家后肚子痛 M Aiyo 两人躬着背进场 A D What s wrong M I ve a stomachache A Me too D What did you eat The food at the school gate M Yes We had some candies just now A I had some too D Oh You ve cheated me You bought the candies instead of the eraser and ruler I always tell you that don t buy the food at the school gate they are unhealthy 生气 M But they look nice A And tastes good M A Aiyo D Well Let s go to the salesman together and have a look M A OK Scene 4 At the school gate N When they get to the school gate a policeman is asking the salesman to go away 正走到校门口 发现警察驱赶校门口的小贩 P Hey You shouldn t stay here leave now C Let s go home let s go home 轻声并拉小贩 S No My candies are nice and popular here And C You are telling a lie I m very dirty and unhealthy M A Dad it s him Aiyo 指着小贩 D He 警察走过来问爸爸 朝小孩 P What s the matter with them D They got a stomachache after having his candies S Really But I ve never heard of it And P Stop stop 打断小贩 Look at the two girls Are you guilty You must be honest with the students and don t sell candies any more 非常严厉 S OK I know 羞愧 C Let s go home Let s go home Policeman 对小孩 Girls please listen Don t buy the candies next time They are bad for your health D Yes he is right And you shouldn t tell a lie to me Try to be an honest person Will you M A OK dad P Let s take them to the hospital now D OK Let s go N 出场 A few days