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A Drink in the Passage -Alan Paton1 In the year 1960 the Union of South Africa celebrated its Golden Jubilee, and there was a nationwide sensation when the one-thousand-pound prize for the finest piece of sculpture was won by a black man, Edward Simelane. His work, African Mother and Child, not only excited the admiration, but touched the conscience or heart or whatever it was that responded, of white South Africa, and seemed likely to make him famous in other countries.2 It was by an oversight that his work was accepted, for it was the policy of the government that all the celebrations and competitions should be strictly segregated. The committee of the sculpture section received a private reprimand for having been so careless as toomit the words for whites only from the conditions, but was told, by a very high personage, it is said, that if Simelanes work was indisputably the best, it should receive the award. The committee then decided that this prize must be given along with the others, at the public ceremony which would bring the particular part of the celebrations to a close. 1960年,南非联邦庆祝其50华诞,黑人爱德华.西梅拉内获得金额为1000英镑的最佳雕塑作品奖,轰动全国。他的作品非洲母子不仅赢得了称赞,而且触动了南非白人的良知和内心,同时也引起了其他反响。这部作品似乎还能使他在别的国家也名声大噪。 他的作品得以参赛是由于一时的疏忽,因为政府政策规定所有庆祝活动和赛事都应该严格实行种族隔离。雕塑委员会曾受到私下的指责,因为他们由于粗心漏掉了赛事条件中“仅限白人”的字眼。但据说一位大人物告知委员会,如果西梅拉内的作品“是无可争议的最佳作品”,那该部作品就应该获奖。因此,委员会决定,这个奖项必须在公开的仪式上与其他奖项一同颁发,以便为庆祝活动出现的这个特殊环节画上一个句号。3 For this decision it received a surprising amount of support from the white public; but in certain powerful quarters, there was an outcry against any departure from the traditional policies of the country, and a threat that many white prize-winners would renounce their prizes. However, a crisis was averted, because the sculptor was “unfortunately unable to attend the ceremony”.对于这样一项决定,组委会获得了数量惊人的白人公众的支持。但这在某些有权势的白人阶层之中却引起了抗议,他们反对任何背离国家“传统政策”的事情,并威胁说许多白人获奖者将宣布放弃所获奖项。但是,由于西梅拉内“非常遗憾不能出席颁奖仪式”,这一场危机得以避免.4 I wasnt feeling up to it,“ Simelane said mischievously to me.My parents,andmywifesparents,andourpriest,decidedthatIwasntfeelinguptoit.AndfinallyIdecidedsotoo.OfcourseMajosiandSolaandtheothers wanted me to go and get my prize personally, but I said, boys, Im a sculptor, not a demonstrator.”“我当时身体不适,不能去领奖,”西梅拉内戏谑地对我说,“我的父母、岳父母以及我们的牧师一致决定我身体不适,不能去领奖。最后,我也决定不去领奖了。当然,毛约希和索拉及其他人都想让我亲自去领奖,但我说,“朋友们,我是雕塑家,不是示威者。”5Thiscognaciswonderful,hesaid,especiallyinthesebigglasses.Itsthe first time Ive had such a glass. Its also the first time Ive drunk a brandy so slowly. InOrlandoyoudevelopathroatofiron,andyoujustputbackyourhead andputitdown,incasethepolicyshouldarrive.6 He said to me, This is the second cognac Ive had in my life. Would you like to hear the story of how I had my first?7 You know the Alabaster Bookshop in Von Brandi Street? Well, after the competition they asked me if they could exhibit my African Mother and Child. They gave a whole window to it, with a white velvet backdrop, if there is anything called white velvet, and some complimentary words.8WellsomehowIcouldnevergoandlookinthatwindow.Onmywayfromthe stationtotheHeraldoffice,Isometimeswentpastthere,andIfeltgoodwhen Isawallthepeoplestandingthere;butIwouldonlysquintatitoutofthe corner of my eye.“这种科尼亚克白兰地真是棒极了,”他说,“尤其是盛在这些大玻璃杯里。我还是第一次用这样的玻璃杯喝酒,也是第一次这样慢慢地品尝白兰地。在奥兰多,你得有一副铁打的喉咙,抬头一仰,把酒大口喝下去,免得警察来了发现。”他对我说:“这是我平生第二次喝科尼亚克白兰地。想听听我第一次喝这种白兰地的故事吗?”你知道位于冯.布兰迪斯街上的阿拉巴斯特书店吗?嗯,赛后,这家书店问我是否可以展出我的非洲母子。他们腾出一整个橱窗摆放这尊雕塑,用白色的天鹅绒作为背景幕布,如果真有白色天鹅绒这种东西的话,还配上了一些赞美的话语。但不知道为什么,我从未走近橱窗看摆放在里面的我的作品。在从火车站到先驱者报社的路上,我有时从那里经过,当看到总是有许多人在那里驻足观看时,我心里美滋滋的;但我只是用眼角瞟上几眼。9ThenonenightIwasworkinglateattheHerald,andwhenIcameouttherewashardlyanyoneinthestreets,soIthoughtIdgoandseethewindow,andindulgecertainpleasurablehumanfeelings.Imusthavegotalittlelostinthecontemplationofmyowngenius,becausesuddenlytherewasayoungwhitemanstandingnexttome. 10Hesaidtome,Whatdoyouthinkofthat,mate?Andyouknow,onedoesntgetcalledmateeveryday.后来,有一天晚上我在先驱者报社工作到了很晚,出来时,街上几乎没有行人了。于是我想去看看那个橱窗,尽情享受一下常人的喜悦之情。当时我肯定是在凝视自己的天才之作时有点忘乎所以了,竟没有发现身旁不知何时站了一位白人青年。他对我说:“伙计,你觉得这尊雕塑怎么样?”要知道,一个人并不是每天都有人称他“伙计”的。11Imlookingatit,Isaid.12Icomeandlookatitnearlyeverynight,hesaid.Youknowitsbyoneofyourownboys,dontyou?13Yea,Iknow.14Itsbeautiful,hesaid.Lookatthatmothershead.Sheslovingthatchild,butshessomehowwatchingtoo.Likesomeoneguarding.Sheknowsitwontbeaneasylife.15Thenhesaidconfidentially,Mate,wouldyoulikeadrink?16WellhonestlyIdidntfeellikeadrinkatthattimeofnight,withawhitestrangerandall,andatrainstilltocatchtoOrlando.17Youknowweblackpeoplemustbeoutofthecitybyeleven,Isaid. 18Itwonttakelong.Myflatsjustroundthecorner.DoyouspeakAfrikaans?19SinceIwasachild,IsaidinAfrikaans.20WellspeakAfrikaansthen.MyEnglishisnttoowonderful.ImvanRensburg.Andyou?21Icouldnthavetoldhimmyname.IsaidIwasVakalisa,livinginOrlando.“我正在欣赏,”我说。“我几乎每天晚上都来看它,”他说,“你知道,这可是由你们的一位兄弟创作的,你知道吧?”“是的,我知道。”“太美了,”他说,“看看那位母亲的表情,她深情地望着孩子,但似乎也在提防着什么,就像一位守护者一样。她知道生活不会一帆风顺。”接着,他悄悄地说:“伙计,想喝一杯吗?”说实在的,我不想在深夜与一个陌生的白人喝酒,有可能会引起种种麻烦,更可况还要赶火车回奥兰多。“你知道,我们黑人晚上十一点前必须出城,”我说。“时间不会太长。我的公寓离这儿很近。你会说南非荷兰语吗?”“从小就会,”我用南非荷兰语说道。“那我们就说南非荷兰语吧。我的英语不太好。我叫范伦斯堡。你呢?”我不可能把我的真名告诉他。于是我就说我叫瓦卡利萨住在奥兰多。22Bythistimehestartedoff,andIwasfollowing,butnotwillingly.Wedidntexactlywalkabreast,buthedidntexactlywalkinfrontofme.Hedidntlookconstrained.Hewasntlookingroundtoseeifanyonemightbewatching.23Hesaidtome,DoyouknowwhatIwantedtodo?24No,Isaid.这时他已经开始走了,我跟着他,但并不很情愿。我们并不是完全并肩而行,但他也不是走在我的前面。他看起来并不拘谨,也没有环顾四周看看是否有人在注意我们。他对我说:“你知道我曾想干什么吗?”“不知道,”我说。25Iwantedabookshop,likethatonethere.Ialwayswantedthat,eversinceIcanremember.ButIhadbadluck.MyparentsdiedbeforeIcouldfinishschool.26Thenhesaidtome,Areyoueducated?27Isaidunwillingly,Yes.ThenIthoughttomyself,howstupid,forleavingthequestionopen.28Andsureenoughheasked,Far?29Andagainunwillingly,Isaid,Far.30Hetookabigleap.Degree?31Yes.32Literature?33Yes.34Heexpelledhisbreath,andgavealongah.Wehadreachedhisbuilding,MajorcaMansions,notoneofthoseluxuriousplaces.Iwasgladtoseethattheentrancelobbywasdeserted.Iwasntatmyease.Theliftwasatgroundlevel,markedWhiteOnly.VanRensburgopenedthedoorandwavedmein.WhileIwaswaitingforhimtopressthebutton,sothatwecouldgetmovingandawayfromthatgroundfloor,hestoodwithhisfingersuspendedoverit,andlookedatmewithakindofhonest,unselfishenvy.35Youwerelucky,hesaid.Literature,thatswhatIwantedtodo.36Heshookhisheadandpressedthebutton,andhedidntspeakagainuntilwestoppedhighup.Butbeforewegotouthesaidsuddenly,IfIhadhadabookshop,Idhavegiventhatboyawindowtoo.“我曾想开家书店,就像那儿的那一家。从我记事起,我就一直有这样的想法。但我运气不好。父母在我上完学之前就去世了。”然后他问我:“你受过教育吗?”我不情愿地回答说:“是的。”然后我心想我真够傻的,因为他会对这个话题问个没完。果然,他继续问道:“学历高吗?”我再次不情愿地说:“挺高。”他向前迈了一大步:“拿到学位了吗?”“拿到了。”“文学方面的?”“对。”他呼了口气,同时长长地“啊”了一声。我们到了他住的马约尔卡公寓,并不是那种奢华的公寓。看到入口大厅没有人,我倒觉得有点高兴,但还是有点不自在。电梯停在一层,门上写着“仅限白人”。范伦斯堡打开电梯门,招手让我进去。当我等他按下按钮以便尽快离开一层楼时,他却站在那里,手指停留在按钮上方,用一种真诚无私的羡慕的表情看着我。“你很幸运,”他说,“文学,那正是我曾经想要学习的。”他摇了摇头并按下了按钮。直到电梯升到高层停了下来他都没有再开口说话。但在我们走出电梯之前,他突然说道:“如果我有一家书店。我也会给那个青年一个橱窗展览他的作品。”37Wegotoutandwalkalongoneofthosepolishedconcretepassageways.Ontheonesidewasawall,andplentyoffreshair,andfardownbelowvonBrandisStreet.Ontheothersidewerethedoors,impersonaldoors.VanRensburgstoppedatoneofthedoors,andsaidtome,Iwontbeaminute.Thenhewentin,leavingthedooropen,andinsideIcouldhearvoices.Thenafteraminuteorso,hecamebacktothedoor,holdingtwoglassesofredwine.Hewaswarmandsmiling.38Sorry,theresnobrandy,hesaid.Onlywine.Hereshappiness.我们走出电梯,沿着一条打磨得很亮的水泥走廊往前走。走廊的一边是墙,走廊里空气新鲜而充足,下面便是冯.布兰迪斯大街。另一边则是门,冷冰冰的门。范伦斯堡在其中的一扇门前停了下来,对我说:“我马上就出来。”然后他走了进去,没关门,我能听到里面说话的声音。大约一分钟之后,他出来了,手里拿着两杯红酒,态度热情,面带微笑。“不好意思,没有白兰地了,”他说,“只有红酒,为幸福干杯。”39NowIcertainlyhadnotexpectedthatIwouldhavemydrinkinthepassage.Iwasntonlyfeelingwhatyoumaybethinking,Iwasthinkingthatoneoftheimpersonaldoorsmightopenatanymoment,andsomeonemightseemeinawhitebuilding,andseemeandvanRensburgbreakingtheliquorlawsofthecountry.Angercouldhavesavedmefromthewholeembarrassingsituation,butyouknowIcanteasilybeangry.EvenifIcouldhavebeen,Imighthavefoundithardtobeangrywiththisparticularman.ButIwantedtogetawayfromthere,andIcouldnt.40VanRensburgsaidtome,DontyouknowthisfellowSimelane?41Iveheardofhim,Isaid.42Idliketomeethim,hesaid.Idliketotalktohim.Headded,Youknow,talkoutmyhearttohim.当时我根本没有料到我会在走廊里喝酒。我当时的感受你无法想象,我在担心其中的一扇冷冰冰的门会突然打开,有人会看到我在“白人”公寓里,看到我和范伦斯堡一起违反国家的禁酒令。我可以用愤怒来摆脱那种尴尬的境地,但你知道,我轻易不发火。即使我是个轻易发火的人,我也有可能很难对面前这个人发火。我想马上离开那儿,但却做不到。范伦斯堡对我说:“你不认识西梅拉内这个人吗?”“听说过他,”我说。“我很想见见他,”他说。“我想和他谈谈。”他补充道,“你知道,我想和他说说我的心里话。”43Awomanofaboutfiftyyearsofagecamefromtheroombeyond,bringingaplateofbiscuits.Shesmiledandbowedtome.Itookoneofthebiscuits,butnotforallthemoneyintheworldcouldIhavesaidtoherdankie,mynooiorthatdisgustingdankie,misses,nordidIwanttospeaktoherinEnglishbecauseherlanguagewasAfrikaans,soItooktheriskofitandusedthewordmevron,forthepolitenessofwhichsomeAfrikanerswouldknockablackmandown,andIsaid,inhighAfrikaans,withasmileandbowtoo,Ekisadankbaar,Mevrou.一位大约五十岁的妇女从旁边的房间走了过来,手里端着一盘饼干。她微笑着向我点头致意。我拿了一块饼干,但无论如何我都不会对她说“谢谢,小姐”或者那令人讨厌的“谢谢,太太”。我也不想和她说英语,因为她说的是南非荷兰语。于是,出于礼貌-南非荷兰人可能会将使用这种礼貌用语的黑人打翻在地-我斗胆用了“夫人”这个词,我面带微笑并鞠了个躬,用上流社会使用的南非荷兰语说:“非常感谢,夫人。”44Butnobodyknockedmedown.Thewomansmiledandbowed,andvanRensburg,inastrainedvoicethatsuddenlycameoutofnowhere,said,Ourlandisbeautiful.Butitbreaksmyheart.45Thewomanputherhandonhisarm,andsaid,Jannie,Jannie.46Thenanotherwomanandman,allaboutthesameage,cameupandstoodbehindvanRensburg.47HesaB.A.,vanRensburgtoldthem.48Thefirstwomansmiledandbowedtomeagain,andvanRensburgsaid,asthoughitwereamatterofgrief,Iwantedtogivehimbrandy,buttheresonlywine.49Thesecondwomansaid,Iremember,Jannie.Comewithme.50Shewentbackintotheroom,andhefollowedher.Thefirstwomansaidtome,Janniesagoodman.Strange,butgood.不过,并没有人将我打翻在地。这位妇女微笑着点点头,而范伦斯堡突然声音变得不自然,莫名其妙地高声冒出一句:“我们的国家很美,但却让我心碎。”“这位妇女将手搭在他的胳膊上,说:“詹尼,詹尼。”之后,又有一男一女走了过来,年龄都差不多,他们站在了范伦斯堡的身后。“他是文学学士,”范伦斯堡告诉他们说。第一位妇女再次冲我微笑并点头致意,范伦斯堡说:“我本想请他喝白兰地,但只有红酒了。”他说话的样子就好像在说一件悲伤的事。另一位妇女说:“我想起来了,詹尼,跟我来。”范伦斯堡跟着她进了房间,第一位妇女对我说:“詹尼是位好人。有些古怪,但人很好。”51AndIthoughtthewholethingwasmad,andgettingbeyondme,withmeablackstrangerbeingshownatestimonialforthesonofthehouse,withthesewhitestrangersstandingandlookingatmeinthepassage,asthoughtheywantedforGodssaketotouchmesomewhereanddidntknowhow,butIsawtheearnestnessofthewomanwhohadsmiledandbowedtome,andIsaidtoher,Icanseethat,Mevrou.52Hegoesdowneverynighttolookatthestatue,shesaid.HesaidonlyGodcouldmakesomethingsobeautiful,thereforeGodmustbeinthemanwhomadeit,andhewantstomeethimandtalkouthishearttohim.53Shelookedbackattheroom,andthenshedroppedhervoicealittle,andsaidtome,Cantyousee,itssomehowbecauseitsablackwomanandablackchild?我觉得这一切太不正常了,让我感到难以理解:一位白人妇女向我这个陌生黑人夸耀公寓里这个小伙子的品格,这些陌生白人站在走廊里看着我,好像他们的的确确想要与我交流,但又不知如何去做。但我看得出来,对我微笑点头的那位妇女是真诚的,于是我对她说:“我看得出来,夫人。”“他每天晚上都去那儿看那尊雕塑,”她说,“他说只有上帝才有可能创造出如此美丽的东西,因此,上帝一定在创作者心中,他想见见这个人,跟他说说心里话。”她回头看了看房间,然后压低声音对我说:“可能是因为雕塑是一位黑人妇女与一个黑人孩子吧,你能明白吗?” 54AndIsaidtoher,Icanseethat,Mevrou.55Sheturnedtothemanandsaidofme,Hesagoodboy.56ThentheotherwomanreturnedwithvanRensburg,andvanRensburghadabottleofbrandy.Hewassmilingandpleased,andhesaidtome,Thisisntordinarybrandy,itsFrench.57 He showed me the bottle, and I, wanting to get the hell out of that place, looked at it and saw it was cognac. He turned to the man and said, Uncle, you remember? The man at the bottle-store said this was the best brandy in the world. 58 I must go, I said. I must catch that train. 59 Ill take you to the station, he said. Dont you worry about that. 60 He poured me a drink and one for himself.我对她说:“我能看出来,夫人。”她转向那个男人说:“他是个好小伙。”这时另一位妇女和范伦斯堡回来了,范伦斯堡手里拿着一瓶白兰地。他满脸笑容,高兴地对我说:“这可不是普通的白兰地,这是法国白兰地。”他让我看了看这瓶酒,而我真想赶快离开这个地方。我看了一眼,这是一瓶科尼亚克白兰地。他转向另一位男人说:“叔叔,还记得吗?酒铺里的那个男的说这是世界上最好的白兰地。”“我得走了,“我说,”我必须赶上那趟火车。”“我会送你去火车站的,”他说,“不用担心。”他为我斟了一杯酒,也为自己倒了一杯。”61Uncle,hesaid,whataboutoneforyourself?62Theoldermansaid,IdontmindifIdo,andhewentinsidetogethimselfaglass.63VanRensburgsaid,happiness,andliftedhisglasstome.Itwasagoodbrandy,thebestIveevertasted.ButIwantedtogetthehelloutofthere.Thenunclecamebackwithhisglasstometoo.Allofuswerefullofgoodwill,butIwaswaitingfortheopeningofoneofthoseimpersonaldoors.Perhapstheyweretoo,Idontknow.Perhapswhenyouwantsobadlytotouchsomeone,youdontcare.IwasdrinkingmybrandyalmostasfastasIwouldhavedrunkitinOrlando.64Imustgo,Isaid.“叔叔,”他说,“你也来一杯怎么样?”那位年纪较大的男人说:“我不介意喝上一杯。”便进房间去拿杯子了。范伦斯堡对我说:“祝你幸福,”便向我举杯。白兰地确实不错,是我喝过的最好的白兰地。但我只是想赶快离开这个地方。这时,他叔叔拿着酒杯回来了,范伦斯堡为他倒了一杯白兰地,他叔叔也向我举起酒杯向我祝酒。我们在场的人都充满了善意,不过,我还担心那些冷冰冰的房门再开启一扇。或许他们也是如此,但我不能确定。也许当你如此想要与别人交流时,你不在意会发生什么事。这杯酒我喝得几乎就像在奥兰多喝时一样快。“我必须得走了,”我说。 65VanRensburgsaid,Illtakeyoutothestation.Hefinishedhisbrandy,andIfinishedminetoo.WehandedtheglassestoUncle,whosaidtome,Goodnight,myboy.Thefirstwomansaid,MayGodblessyou,andtheotherwomanbowedandsmiled.ThenvanRensburgandIwentdowninthelifttothebasement,andgotintohiscar.66ItoldyouIdtakeyoutothestation,hesaid.Idtakeyouhome,butImfrightenedofOrlandoatnight.67WedroveupEloffStreet,andhesaid,DidyouknowwhatImean?Iwantedtoanswerhim,butIcouldnt,becauseIdidntknowwhatthatsomethingwas.HecouldntbetalkingaboutbeingfrightenedofOrlandoatnight,becausewhatmorecouldonemeanthanjustthat?68Bywhat?Iasked.69Youknow,hesaid,aboutoutlandbeingbeautiful?70Yes,Iknewwhathemeant,andIknewthatforGodssakehewantedtotouchmetooandhecouldnt;forhiseyeshadbeenblindedbyyearsinthedark.AndIthoughtitwasapityhewasblind,forifmennevertoucheachother,theyllhurteachotheroneday.Anditwasapityhewasblind,andcouldnttouchme,forblackpeopledonttouchwhitemenanymore;onlybyaccident,whentheymakesomethinglikeMotherandChild.范伦斯堡说:“我送你到火车站

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