2024年浙江卷1月读后续写(路痴的自我救赎)讲义-高考英语作文复习专项2

2024年1月浙江高考读后续写Eva

spentthefirstweekofhighschooltryingtokeepherheadabovewater.Oneofthemajorheadachesforherwasfindingherwayinthehugeschoolbuilding.Itwasa

sixstorybuilding.Oneachfloor,hallwaysstretchedinfourdirections,leadingtoclassrooms,laboratories,andteachers'offices.Somewhereinthebuilding,therewasalsoalibrary,acafeteria,andagym.Havingapoorsenseof

direction,Evafounditimpossibletogetaroundinsuchahugebuilding.Allthedifferenthallwaysandroomsweretoomuchtothinkabout,letalonemittomemory.Shedecidedthatshewould

memorize

whereherclasseswereandthenpretendthattherestoftheplacedidn'texist.InherfirstPEclass,Evawasshockedwhen

coachPitt

announcedthateveryonehadtorun

onemile

aroundthetrackoutside.Shesearchedthefacesofherclassmatesforsignsofpanic.Therewasnothingshefearedmorethanhavingtorunawholemile.ToEva,"amile"wasusedtodescribelongdistances.Itwastenmilesfromherhometohergrandfather's,andthatalwaysseemedlikealongway,eveninacar!WhenCoachPittblewhiswhistle(哨子),Evafiguredshewouldbeleftinthedust.However,whilesomeofherclassmatesedgedahead,othersactuallyfellbehind."It'sjustthebeginning,"shethought."I'lleinlastforsure."SoonEvabegantobreathehard,withherheartpoundingandlegsshaking.Feelingdesperate,Evastartedusinga

mindtrick

onherself.Shestoppedthinkingabouttheword"mile."Instead,shefocusedonreachingtheshadowcastonthetrackbyanoaktreeupahead.Thenshe

concentrated

onjoggingtothespotwherethetrackcurved(拐弯).Afterthat,shetriedtoseeifshecouldpleteherfirstlap.Onelapturnedintotwo,thenthree,thenfour.Paragraph1:WhencoachPittsaid"Nicework!"toheratthefinishline,Evawassurprised.______________________________________________________________________________________________________________Paragraph2:Evadecidedtousethesametricktodealwiththeschoolbuilding.______________________________________________________________________________________________________________

1

文本故事梗概中学生活第一周，Eva同学正在努力适应新环境，时常迷失在纵横交错的教学楼走廊中。体育课上，Pitt教练要求学生在操场上跑完一英里。这项任务让Eva感到惊慌，因为对她而言，一英里是很长的距离。面对困境，她用心理战术（mindtrick）鼓励自己，通过关注操场上一棵橡树的树影来转移注意力。同时，Eva将一英里的挑战细分成若干个小圈，每个小圈都是她能够掌控的小目标。这种方法奏效了。在她全神贯注地逐个击破这些小目标时，四圈早已悄然完成，终点就在眼前…

2

续写策略建议很容易看出，原文中的主要人物是新生Eva。体育老师Pitt则是次要人物。第一段续写的重点应该放在Eva跑完1英里之后的内心感受描写上。当然，从给出的首句“Nicework!”可以看出，Pitt应当和Eva有一定的语言和动作上的互动。续写的难点在第二段，也就是具体Eva如何把这种mindtrick运用到识记错综复杂的6层教学楼当中。这段续写想要做到合理，写作必须紧密联系Eva在跑一英里过程中所使用的mindtrick的核心:拆分任务（divideandconquer）化整为零（breakdownthewholeintoparts）.写作示范WhencoachPittsaid"Nicework!"toheratthefinishline,Evawassurprised.

Shehadexpectedtobethelastonetofinish,butthereshewas,receivingpraisefromthe

coach.Gaspingforair,withsweatdrippingdownherface,sherealizedshehadacplishedsomethingshethoughtwasimpossible.Thesenseofachievementwasoverwhelming.Asshestoodthere,catchingherbreath,Evareflectedonherjourneyaroundthetrack.Itwasn'tjustaboutpleting

onemile,itwasaboutoveringherfearandpushingpastherperceivedlimitations.Thisexperiencewasapowerfulreminderthatshecouldachievemorethanshehadevergivenherselfcreditfor.Evadecidedtousethesametricktodealwiththeschoolbuilding.

Justlikeshehad

concentrated

onsmall,achievablegoalsduringher

onemile

run,shebegantobreakdowntheschoolmapintosmaller,manageablesections.Insteadoftryingto

memorize

theentirelayoutatonce,shestartedbyfamiliarizingherselfwiththeareasaroundherclassrooms.Gradually,herunderstandingofthe

sixstorybuilding

grew.Daybyday,themazeofhallwaysandroomsbecamelessintimidating.Evalearnedthat,whetheronthetrackorinthecorridorsofherschool,takingthingsonestepatatimewasthekeytooveringherfearsandchallenges.默写版：WhencoachPittsaid"Nicework!"toheratthefinishline,Evawassurprised.

Shehadexpectedtobethelastonetofinish,_______________________但她在那里，受到了教练的赞扬._____________________________________________________她喘着粗气，汗水顺着脸往下滴，意识到自己完成了一些她认为不可能完成的事情.Thesenseofachievementwasoverwhelming.Asshestoodthere,____________________________________________________________伊娃喘着粗气，回忆起她绕跑道的旅程.Itwasn'tjustaboutpleting

onemile,itwasaboutoveringherfearandpushingpastherperceivedlimitations.___________________________________________________这段经历有力地提醒我们，她可以取得比以往任何时候都更大的成就.Evadecidedtousethesametricktodealwiththeschoolbuilding.

Justlikeshehad

concentrated

onsmall,achievablegoalsduringher

onemile

run,______________________________________________________________她开始把学校地图分解成更小、易于管理的部分.Insteadoftryingto

memorize

theentirelayoutatonce,shestartedbyfamiliarizingherselfwiththeareasaroundherclassrooms.Gradually,herunderstandingofthe

sixstorybuilding

grew.___________________________________________________________________一天比一天，迷宫般的走廊和房间变得不那么吓人了。Evalearnedthat,________________________________________________________________无论是在跑道上还是在学校的走廊里，一步一个脚印是克服恐惧和挑战的关键.01写作细节分析WhenCoachPittsaid"Nicework!"toheratthefinishline,Evawassurprised.

Shehadexpectedtobethelastonetofinish,butthereshewas,receivingpraisefromthe

coach.（必要的主要人物和次要人物之间的互动）Gaspingforair,withsweatdrippingdownherface,sherealizedshehadacplishedsomethingshethoughtwasimpossible.（合理的细节描写：Eva不擅长跑步，跑完后大汗淋漓、气喘吁吁）Thesenseofachievementwasoverwhelming.（合理的情感描写：获得了成就感）Asshestoodthere,catchingherbreath,Evareflectedonherjourneyaroundthetrack.Itwasn'tjustaboutpleting

onemile,itwasaboutoveringherfearandpushingpastherperceivedlimitations.（反思跑步成功的原因，为下文找到记忆错综复杂的教学楼做铺垫)

Thisexperiencewasapowerfulreminderthatshecouldachievemorethanshehadevergivenherselfcreditfor.Evadecidedtousethesametricktodealwiththeschoolbuilding.

Justlikeshehad

concentrated

onsmall,achievablegoalsduringher

onemile

run,shebegantobreakdowntheschoolmapintosmaller,manageablesections.（和原文高度互动：跑完一英里的关键是Eva专注于拆分后的若干小任务）Insteadoftryi