社区家庭邻里情感类读后续写-父母患病子女远行邻居不是亲人胜似亲人讲义-高二英语上学期作文复习专项

海南省天一大联考20242025学年高二下学期学业水平诊断（三）英语

阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段、使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Mybrotherand|leftourhometownintheMidwestyearsago,eachpursuing

careersandbuildinglivesanhour'sdrivefromourparents9house出立土格文代做聿的修景）.

Whilewemeasuredweeklycallsandweekendvisits,thedistanceseemedlikeasilent

worry^.x^-especiallyasourdad'shealthdeclinedwithcancerandourmommanaged

herheartdiseasealone.Littledidweknowthat回装如fatehadplacedguardian

angelsnextdoor（文聿中心已他呼之欲出，可不肥与电亳）.

MyparentshavelivedintheMidwestforover30years.Foryears,itwasjust

them,uskidsingandqoiniA立士格，,andthequietrhythmofsmalltownlife.Butwhen

IheSmithsmovedinnexldoorfiveyearsago,thatrhythmgainedanew,beautiful

beat无灵主

lomSmith,aconstructionworkerwithaheartasbigashistoolbell,andhiswife

Ellcr）,aretirednurse,wouldcwiththeirkidsLily,then15,andJake,20and

Bear.AlamedBear.Atfirst,theinteractionsweresimple:wavesacrossthefence,

sharedstoriesovermorningcoffeeandLilyaskingtopetthedog.以理解为.立主格心司井列打

Butasmydad'shealthdeclinedandmymom'sdiseasedemandedmoreattention,

thosesmallexchangesgrewintosomethingstrong.

Tomtooktocheckingonmydaddaily,oftenchatlinewith111111私分（做伴「动作）.

“Yourdadisastoryteller,"he'dsay."Bestpartofmydaylistoninitohistales座分网一

件at阶作，Ellen.noticinRmvmom'sstniv/letomanageherbloodsugah现叁分/9语做到“动作％

starteddroppingoffnotesonthefridgewithwords:"Roastchickcnnosugar,extra

love!MAndthekidsbecameregularstoo,helpingtowaterthegardenformy

Darents梯分沔段做停山动作•.

peaceful.Thenemedpeaceful.Thenonespringnight,pstormhitsuddenly收亭的收心事件

*"Thunderwasloudandrainbeathardagainstthewindows.Myparents'oldmaple

tre|,weakfromyearsofslorms、dj"语做扑语4g工定*，,struggledinthewindandfellontothe

driveway,blockingitplete1Vl观4分词小好做结果状语,这一八大有.而感了］，.Whenmyparentsphonedme

abouttheirsituation,IwastrappedonhighwaysfjHedwithfaHcnbranches1过去分八娘语做

后卫定环，.Unfortunately,mybrotherwasawayonabusinesstripinanothercity,”交分城＞,Wc

worrieddeeplyaboutourdadandourmom,beinualoneinthestocm现在分司纥证狱任工定一u）.

注意:1.续写词数应为150左右；

2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

ParagraphI:Atthatmoment,somefamiliarfiguresappeared.

Paragraph2:Afterthestorm,mybrotherandIknockedontheSmiths,door.

海南省天一大联考20242025学年高二下学期学业水平诊断（三）英语

阅读下面材料.根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Mybrotherand1leftourhometownintheMidwestyearsago,eachpursuing

careersandbuildinglivesanhour'sdrivefromourparents,house.Whilewe

treasuredweeklycallsandweekendvisits,thedistanceseemedlikeasilent

worryespeciallyasourdad'shealthdeclinedwithcancerandourmommanagedher

heartdiseasealone.Littledidweknowthatfatehadplacedguardianangels（天

使）nextdoor.

MyparentshavelivedintheMidwestforover30years.Foryears,itwasjust

them,uskidsingandgoing,andthequietrhylhm（节奏）ofsmalltownlife.Butwhen

theSmithsmovedinnextdoorfiveyearsago,thatrhythmgainedanew,beautiful

beat.

TomSmith,aconstructionworkerwithaheartasbigashistoolbelt,andhiswife

Ellen,aretirednurse,wouldewiththeirkidsLBear.Aten15,andJake,20andadog

namedBear.Atfirst,theinteractionsweresimple:wavesacrossthefence,shared

storiesovermorningcoffeeandLilyaskingtopctthedog.Butasmydad'shealth

declinedandmymom'sdiseasedemandedmoreattention,thosesmallexchanges

grewintosonielhingstrong.

Tomtooktocheckingonmydaddaily,oftenchattingwithhim."Yourdadisa

storyteller,he\isay."Bestpartofmydaylisteningtohistales."Ellen,noticingmy

mom'sstruggletomanageherbloodsugar,starteddroppingoffnotesonthefridge

withwords:"Roastchickennosugar,extralove!^^Andthekidsbecameregularstoo,

helpingtowaterthegardenformyparents.

peaceful.Thenloud.andpeaceful.Thenonespringnight,astormhitsuddenly.

Thunderwasloud.andrainbeathardagainstthewindows.Myparents5oldmapletree,

weakfromyearsofstorms.struggledinthewindandfellontothedriveway,blocking

itplctcly.Whenmyparentsphonedmeabouttheirsituation,Iwastrappedon

highwaysfilledwithfallenbranches.Unfortunately,mybrotherwasawayona

businesstripinanothercity.Weworrieddeeplyaboutourdadandourmom,being

aloneinthestorm.

注意：1.续写词数应为150左右；

2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

ParagraphI:Atthatmoment,somefamiliarfiguresappeared.

Paragraph2:Afterthestorm,mybrotherandIknockedontheSmiths,door.

1.文章分类与续写思路分析

文章类型：社区家庭邻里情感类（家庭温情+邻里互助）

续写构思方向：

情感基调：温暖、感恩、互助

核心冲突：父母在暴风雨夜孤立无援，邻居史密斯一家及时帮助

主题升华：陌生人如何成为“守护天使、弥补子女无法陪伴的遗憾

布局与框架：

段落内容设计关键衔接点

史密斯一家冒雨出现，分工救援（如汤姆承接“雷雨夜”“树倒

第一段清理树干，艾伦照顾父母情绪，孩子安抚堵路”“子女被困”的

宠物）危机

风暴后子女登门感谢，发现史密斯一家默

呼应“邻居日常帮

第二段默付出的细节（如冰箱上的便签、父亲的

助”“父母依赖感”

日记），揭示“守护天使”的深层意义

续写注意事项：

承接原文：

时间/空间：暴风雨夜一次日清晨

人物动作：史密斯一家的救援动作需具体（如“Tom挥舞电锯”“Ellen提急救箱”）

情感线索：父母从“恐慌”到“安心"子女从“担忧”到“感激”

巧妙设计：

加入象征性细节（如“Bear舔母亲的手表安慰）

用对话揭示伏笔（如父亲说“史密斯总说我的故事救了他”）

2.故事山模式与原文分析

故事山结构：

阶段原文内容续写对应点

开端子女离家，父母健康恶化暴风雨引发危机

发展史密斯一家逐渐融入父母生活邻居冒雨救援

高潮树倒堵路，子女无法赶到史密斯一家化解危机

结局子女感恩，主题升华

关键分析表：

分析角度内容原文反应句

史密斯一家无私善

人物刻画“Tomtooktocheckingonmydaddaily”

良

“thosesmallexchangesgrewintosomething

情感层次父母从孤独到依赖

strong”

关键情节点暴风雨夜树倒“theoldmapletree...fellontothedriveway”

分析角度内容原文反应句

语言特色朴实中带温情“extralove!”（冰箱便签）

心理描写子女的担忧“Weworrieddeeplyaboutourdadandmom”

动作描写邻居的日常帮助“helpingtowaterthegarden”

隐含主题邻里如亲“guardianangelsnextdoor”

父母健康问题+子

伏笔冲突“distanceseemedlikeasilentworry”

女距离

父亲的故事对汤姆

隐含线索“Yourdadisastoryteller”

有意义

解决方案：

明线：史密斯一家清理路障、提供医疗帮助

暗线：通过救援行动揭示“守护天使”的伏笔（如汤姆曾受父亲故事鼓舞）

续写段落示范（大纲）

Paragraph1:

动作衔接：闪电中史密斯一家披雨衣现身，汤姆月电锯锯树，艾伦检查父母健康

状况。

情感衔接：母亲颤抖的手被莉莉握住，父亲重复“你们不该冒险.

关键词复用：“Bear”（狗）冲进屋内抖落雨水，打破紧张气氛。

Paragraph2:

空间转换：次日清晨，子女看到整洁的车道和厨房里热汤，发现父亲日记记录“史

密斯每晚陪他看夕阳二

主题升华：汤姆说：“你们父母才是天使，他们让我懂得家的意义。”

3.英文例句及高级替换词

（1）动作描写（ActionDescriptions）

Tomgrabbedachainsawandbegancuttingthroughthefallentreetrunk.

（汤姆抓起电锯，开始锯断倒下的树干。）

Ellenrushedintothehouse,herraincoatdrippingwet.

（艾伦冲进屋子，雨衣还在滴水。）

Lilykneltbesidemymom,gentlyholdinghertremblinghands.

（莉莉跪在我妈妈身旁，轻轻握住她颤抖的双手。）

Bearbarkedloudly,hisfursoakedfromthestorm.

（Bear大声吠叫，毛发被暴雨淋湿。）

Mydadstruggledtostand,leaningheavilyonTom'sshoulder.

（我爸爸挣扎着站起来，重重地靠在汤姆的肩膀上。）

Jakedraggedthebrokenbranchesaway,hismusclesstraining.

（Jake拖走断裂的树枝，肌肉紧绷。）

Thewindhowledoutside,rattlingthewindows.

（风在外面呼啸，震得窗户咔咔作响。）

Momclutchedherchest,herbreathingshallow.

（妈妈捂着胸口，呼吸急促。）

Tomwipedhisbrow,sweatmixingwiththerain.

（汤姆擦了擦额头，汗水与雨水混在一起。）

Ellenwrappedablanketaroundmymom'sshoulders.

（艾伦把毯子披在我妈妈的肩上。）

⑵心理描写（PsychologicalDescriptions）

AwaveofreliefwashedovermeasIsawtheSmithsarrive.

（看到史密斯一家来了，我松了一口气。）

Feargnawedatmyheart——whatifmyparentswerehurt?

（恐惧啃噬着我的心——万一我父母受伤了怎么办？）

Guiltweighedheavilyonmefornotbeingthere.

（无法陪伴的内疚感沉重地压在我心头。）

Dad'seyessoftenedwithgratitudeasTomhelpedhim.

（汤姆帮忙时，爸爸的眼神因感激而柔和下来。）

Mom'slipstrembled,hervoicebarelyawhisper.

（妈妈的嘴唇颤抖着，声音几乎微不可闻。）

Ifeltalumpinmythroat,unabletospeak.

（我喉咙发紧，说不出话来。）

Jake'sreassuringsmilecasedsomeofmyanxiety.

（Jake安慰的微笑缓解了我的部分焦虑。）

Asenseofhelplessnesscreptinasthestormragedon.

（暴风雨肆虐时，一种无助感悄然袭来。）

Forthefirsttime,Itrulyunderstoodthemeaningof<4guardianangels.”

（我第一次真正理解了“守护天使”的含义。）

Mybrother'svoicecrackedwithworryoverthephone.

（电话里，我哥哥的声音因担忧而哽咽。）

（3）环境描写（EnvironmentalDescriptions）

Therainlashedagainstthewindowslikearelentlessdrumbeat.

（雨水猛烈地拍打着窗户，像无情的鼓点。）

Thunderrumbledinthedistance,shakingtheground.

（远处雷声隆隆，震得地面颤动。）

Theoldmapletreegroanedundertheforceofthewind.

（老枫树在狂风中发出呻吟。）

Thedrivewaywaspletelyblockedbythefallentree.

（车道被倒下的树完全堵住了。）

Lightningflashed,illuminatingtheterrifiedfacesinside.

（闪电划过，照亮了屋内惊恐的脸。）

Thestormhadturnedthepeacefulneighborhoodintochaos.

（暴风雨让宁静的社区陷入混乱。）

Waterpooledonthefloorwheretheroofleaked.

（屋顶漏雨，地板上积了一滩水。）

Thewindhowledlikeawoundedanimal.

（风像受伤的野兽一样嚎叫。）

Thescentofwetearthfilledtheairaftertherain.

（雨后，潮湿的泥土气息弥漫在空气中。）

Thefirstlightofdawnrevealedthedamageleftbythestorm.

（黎明的第一缕阳光照出了暴风雨留下的破坏。）

4.高级替换词&语料积累

（1）高级替换词（按场景分类）

基础词高级替换词适用场景

helpassist,aid,support救援、照顾

kindpassionate,benevolent,selfless描述善良

worriedanxious,distressed,uneasy心理描写

quicklyswiftly,promptly,hastily动作迅速

tiredexhausted,weary,drained疲惫状态

(2)固定搭配&词法解析

checkonsb.（查看某人情况）

Tomtooktocheckingonmydaddaily.

dropoff（顺路送某物）

Ellenstarteddroppingoffnotesonthefridge.

taketo（doingsth.）（开始习惯做某事）

Tomtooktochattingwithmydadeverymorning,

manage（acondition/disease）（控制病情）

Mymomstruggledtomanageherheartdisease,

blockpletcly（完全堵住）

Thefallentreeblockedthedrivewaypletely.

（3）可积累的生词短语

decline（v.）（恶化）

Hishealthdeclinedrapidlyafterthediagnosis.

近：deteriorate/反：improve

guardianangel（n.）（守护天使）

TheSmithswerelikeguardianangeistomyparents.

近：protector/反：threat

rhythm（n.）（节奏）

Thequietrhythmofsmalltownlifewasforting.

近：pace/反：chaos

struggle（v.）（挣扎）

Theoldtreestruggledagainstthestrongwind.

近：strive/反：succeed

tremble(v.)(颤抖)

Herhandstrembledassheheldthecup.

近：shake/反：steady

总结

动作描写：多用具体动词(grab,rush,kneel,drag)增强画面感。

心理描写：用比喻(waveofrelief,guiltweighed)表达情绪。

环境描写：拟声词(howled,rumbled)渲染氛围。

高级替换：避免重复，如用passionate代替kind,

固定搭配：如checkon,dropoff,让表达更地道。

5.PossibleVersions(4)

Version1

Paragraph1:Afthatmoment,somefamiliarfiguresaDDeared.Ton|,JEllcn.and

theirchildren,LilyandJak(|,allheldumbrellasandflashlights.Myfatheropened

thedoorjustasTomshouted,“Wesawthetreefall!”Withouthesitation,Tomand

Jakeapproachedtheblockeddriveway.Usingtheirtoolsandteamwork(以分仞姐女》MH

件,，theybegancuttingthebrokenbranchesandclearingapath.Meanwhile,Ellen

helpedmymothertositdown,wrappingawarmblanketaroundhershoulders*

分切短沿短件质动柞％Lily,thoughsoakedfromtherain，m语做主*口语),gentlyplacedamugof

warmteainmyfather^hands,whispering，现在分为0“做仲M动作，,“It'sgoingtobeokay/'

9

Theircalm,determinedactionseasedmyparentsfear,无灵士语句,・Watchingthe

Smithsactsoswiftly分词贱诏做支小.asifhelpingthsirownfamily,wassomething

beyondkindness-itwasloveinaction.

Paragraph2:Afterthestorm,brothera〃d/knockedtheSmiths'door.

WhenTomopened(hedoor,holdingaphot。albumfilledwithmemoriesofour

parents'lifeintheneighborhood过去分词姐夏文话、"Wewantedyoutoknowhowmuch

youmeantothem—andtousJIsaid,voicetremblingsli211tly国立土段.Tomgrinned,

wipiii!hishandsonhispants।现在分词做件够动作)."We'reneighbors.Thal'swhatwedo.”

Ellenadded,“Familyisnotjustblood,sometimesit'safenceaway."Asweshared

storiesandlaughter,Irealizedthatinthisquiettown,wehadfoundmorethan

guardians—wehadfoundfamily.Beforeweleft,Lilyhandedusasmallnotebook.

labeledDad'sStories(过士分沌软后工s、.“Hetoldussomany,“shesmiled.Inthatmoment,

IknewtheSmithshadn'tjustsavedthenight-theyhadgivenussomethingto

holdontoforvearstoe.

语言分析与语料积累

类别表现

高分语法点uM

状语从句：asifhelpingtheirownfami!y

类别表现

现在分词:“holdingumbrellas","wrappingablanket”

非限制性定语从句：“Tom,whoalways...”

clearapath

地道搭配voicetremblingslightly

somethingbeyondkindness

同义词替换“help"一assist,etoone'said

"calm”—>posed,steady

voicetrembling

情绪描写短语easedtheirfear

whisperedgently

approachedthedriveway

动作描写短语wrappedawarmblanket

wipedhishands

亮词升级“said”—>murmured,responded,explained

“kindness”—>passion,generosity

Shewhisperedsoftly,hervoicetremblingwithemotion.

例句积累Heworkedasifhewerehelpinghisownfather.

Theircalmpresencemeltedthepanicintheair.

Thebrokentreestoodlikeabarrierbetweenfearandhelp.

Version2

Paragraph1:41fhafmoment,somefamiliarfinreaappeared.Flashlights

bobbedthroughtherain,尢又土语％倩代？LhwastheSmith|,withBearbarkinggently

besidethem।分作做后又定论).(Tomwavedashecalledoul,“Stayinside-we'vegotthis!”

Inablurof[eamwork,peandJakestarteddraggingthelargestbranchesasidewhile

EllenandLil«checkedonmyparents.Myfather,stillshaken《逵去分我惊皿"卜铅triedtohelp

butwasfirmlytoldtorest.Ellenquicklyassessedmymother'sconditionand

whisperedreassuranceswhilehandingheraDillboxfromihekilchen.LilJ,dripping

u

wet,现左分词”语做后工之语),smiledandjoked,Guessthisstormforgotwehadplanstonight!”

Thatsinglemoment—stormyandchaotic口齿做朴语(一turnedintoamemoryofwarmth

andsafety.ThoughmybrotherandIwerefaraway,weknewsomeonehadstepped

inwhenitmatteredmust.

Paragraph2:Afterthesto门n,brotherand/knockedontheSmiths'door.

Withahomemadecakeandtwohandwrittenletter*inhand，“如复金结构、weknockedon

thedoor.Themomentthedouropened,wcwerewclcdwithwairnhugsand

familiarlaughter."We'rejustgratefillyouwerethere/'mybrothersaid.Ellensmiled,

"They'relikeourownparentsnow."Aswesatiniheircozylivingroom,lookingat

Bearsnorin?bythefire,山t分网用乩件随动例.Lilyreadpartofherletteraloud:"Thanksfbr

beingourheroesintherain."Thequietsincerityinhervoicemovedeveryone.It

wasn'tagrandrescue,butitwaslovestitchedintoeverydayacts试去分>维）做后置定

-checking,helping.fortine（动名如t*外m.Thatday,wepromisedtoreturnmore

often-notoutofguilt,butoutoflove,tosharethekindnesstheSmithshad

modeledsoeffortlessly.

语言分析与语料积累

类别表现

虚拟语气：“asifthestormforgotwehadplans”

加分语法点

分词结构：“drippingwet,smiled^^

强调结构:"ItwastheSmithswho...”

whisperreassurances

地道搭配dragbranchesaside

snoringbythefire

替换词“chaotic"=hectic,stormy

“safb"=protected,secured

firmlytoldtorest

情绪短语movedeveryone

sincerevoice

bobbingflashlights

动作短语handingapillbox

satinthecozylivingroom

亮词升级“helped”—>camethrough,steppedin

“gratefbl”—►thankful,appreciative

类别表现

Shehandedoverthemedicineboxwithoutaword,butwithdeepcare.

例句积累Itwasn'tarescuewithsirens,butonewithheart.

Flashlightsdancedthroughthestormlikeguidingstars.

Lovewasstitchedintothelittlethingstheydid.

Version3

Paragraph1:Afthatmoment,somefamiliarfiguresWDeared.Toi|,hiswork

bootssplashedwithmud&立主段.wasalreadyassessingthefallentree.Jakq,cairyisg

achainsawandroues姐分训薇之语、approachedthefallentreetoo.Bearbarkedonce,

asifencouragingthem.MyfatheropenedthedoorjustasTomshouted,“Hang

tight—we'rehere!”Whiletheyworked,pllcnbroughtoversomemedicineanda

warmdrink,ventlyguidingmymothertothesofa，0&今说微珏丛钵成矽切.1.ilywrappedthe

dogintowelsandhelpedlightcandlesasthepowerflickered.Despitethestorm

outside,therewasawarmthinsidethatcamenotfromelectricity,butfrom|human

care.Myparents,ihoughshaken过去分】做“由扑立'foundthemselvesquietlysmiling.

Thoughmilessepanitedus,|theSmiths'actionsconnecteduscloserthanever.

Paragraph2:Afterthest(mn,〃力brotherand/knocked〃〃theSmiths'doo匕、

Carryinganoldfamilyphoto现今分叫3哥做并随uiframedwithanotcut*分网告文沏:^You've

beenpartofthisstory."Tomlaughedheartily.wasjusttellingyourdad'sfishing

storytoJakeagain."Wesataroundthetable、drinkinghotcocoa,现在分傅奴语做体腌动作,as

laughterechoedthroughthehouse."Youweretheangelswedidn'tknowwe

needed,“Isaidquietly.Ellenrearedup,replying，屈语做件MU作),“We'rejustluckyto

haveneighborslikethis?Itwasn'taboutheroism.Itwasaboutthesmall,steadfast

things-checkingin,stayingclose,lovingwithoutbeingasked现在分㈣败谭井列，.We

promisedtovisitmore,notjustforourparents,buttoremindtheSmithsthey

weren'tjustneighbors.Theywereourchosenfamily.

语言分析与语料积累

类别表现

类别表现

强调结构：uItwasnHaboutheroism—itwasabout...n

高分语法点

分词作伴随："carryingachainsaw”,"wrappedintowels”

定语从句：“theangelsvvedidn'tknowwcneeded”

flickeringlights

高频搭配quietlysmiling

framedwithanote

词汇替