安徽省巢湖市春晖中学2020届高考英语 考前冲刺精品讲义外教旁批写作外教旁批写作 (21)

安徽巢湖市春晖中学2020年高考英语短跑优秀讲义旁批写(22)你叫李红。你学校为一群来自加拿大的交换生找房子住两个星期。你故意申请写信，说明你申请的原因(包括具备的条件)。学生习作外国老师改了June 7，2020Dear sir、_Sir/Madam、I hear 1 understand that our school will welcome some Canadian students to _ stay _ with _ us _ for _ or for two weeks . studentsFirst，My parents and I can speak englishwell . that _ benefits _ us _ to _ communicate _ with _ each _ other servicefurther more，I live near the Huangpu river。it has a good view of Shanghai。Last but not least，in my home，He _ or _ she they will enjoy _ much _ China _ culture 6 experience a wealth of ChineseI think our friendly 10 friendliness will give him them a both 11 an interesting and comfortable experience。thank you for your _ reading _ during _ your _ busy work 12 consiring my application . I _ hope _ that _ you _ wwI look forward to hearing from you soon。Yours sincerely faithfully，李红，旁边放置1.在正式信件中最好使用understand。2.这句话不需要，要进入正题。3.原来的句子语法上错了。另外，可以写连接词，使句子变长，把两个句子的内容联系起来。这是另一点，应该是另一段。5.这种表现很别扭。在这种情况下，即使指向一个人，也可以使用复数形式them。6.这句话有两个错误。第一，“中国文化”的正确表达是中国文化，而不是中国文化。第二，动词应该使用experience(体验)，而不是enjoy。因为我不确定他们是否会喜欢这种文化。7.作者可能想说calligraphy(书法)。Handwriting是“书写样式”或“书写”的意思。8.这两个句子意思相连，必须连成一个句子。这也可以减少作文中短句子的数量。9.不能说有人是has a good skill in something。您可以使用Skilled in something。10.词类不对。Friendly是形容词。11.词汇顺序不合适。12.这样写很别扭。请参阅修改后的句子。这是一篇更好的作文。作文完美地回答了题目的要求。但未能达到三星级水平的原因是作者没有抓住写平行句子和复合句的机会，使用了太多的短文。记住：这样写的话，不能向考官展示高中阶段的学习水平。高分作文的秘诀15:使用短语作为副词时，要避免逻辑关系的混乱。例如：Instead of(不要说：)At the age of ten，my grandfather died of cancer .Use(要说：)When I was ten，my grandfather died of cancer .Instead of(不要说：)As a middle school student，his parents are strict with him .Use(要说：)Since he is a middle school student，his parents are strict with him .Instead of(不要说：)To swim properly，a course of instruction is necessary .Use(说：)To swim properly，one needs a course of instruction。Instead of(不要说：)Walking through the park，an old tower came into sight .Use(要说：)When we walked through the park，an old tower came into sight .Instead of(不要说：)Falling off the bicycle，my leg got badly hurt .Use(要说：)Falling off the bicycle，I had my leg badly hurt。Instead of(不要说：)Going through a red light，the traffic police on duty stopped him .Use(要说：)Going through a red light，he was stopped by the traffic police on duty .假定你是李华，作为北京科技大学的在校生，想申请外国某大学的微电子和奖学金。请写一封申请书，说明你的情况和申请的理由。_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _参考风扇：Dear Sir、I should like to apply for one of the scholars hips that your department may be offering to studens from other countries .would you please send me the n Eces sary application forms and any further details about the scholars hips？I am a post greuate student in beijin science and engineering university。I major in micro electronics engineering，And do some research work during my study years。I hope to have a further study and continue to do my research work if I succed in obtaining the engineering schol