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Roommateconflict1/16AboutproblemsbetweenroommatesandtheirsolutionsQuestionnaire
2/16Whatareyoudoinginthedormat10P.M?EatingChattingSleepingStudying
10%30%35%25%3/16Doyousharethesamehabitwithyourroommate?ManySomeLessno15%35%45%5%4/16Whatyoudothinkofyourdormlifeatpresent?SatisfyingJustso-soAwful
30%45%25%5/16Haveyoueverhadroommateconflicts?AlwaysSometimesSeldomNever25%35%45%5%6/16Whatareyouusuallyarguingfor?TimeforsleepingLivinghabitsCleaningOpinionsaboutsomethingOthers15%30%15%30%10%7/16Whatkindofmeasurewouldyoutakewhenconflictoccurs?SpeakoutdirectlySendamessageore-mailKeepitinmindOthers30%25%35%10%8/16Wouldyouturntoyourroommatesfirstwhenyouareintrouble?YesNoIdon’tknow35%25%40%9/16Whatdoyouthinkaffecttheroommaterelationshipsmost?RegionsBackgroundsCharactersAcademicrecords
10%30%45%15%10/16Ifthereisachancetorecombinethedormmembers,wouldyoustillliketolivewiththeformerroommates?YesNoItdoesn’treallymatter20%30%50%11/16Whatdoyouthinkisthemostdesperateproblemtobesolveinthedorm?Cleaning DifficultpersonBadhabitandbehaviorOthers
15%25%35%15%12/16TalkShow13/16HOST:…STUDENT:Therearesixpersonsinourdormitory,whichdiffersfromtheordinarydormof4.Morepeoplemeanmorecharacters,morethoughts,morehabits,andlesspersonalspace.Theinconveniencecausedbythecrowdedroomcanbereallyannoying.GRADUATE:Thisproblemdoesexistinsomedorms.TheroomIusedtoliveisanordinaryroom.4personssharearoom.Everyonehaveadeskwhichwasenoughformetodothemostworks.STUDENT:Thereissometimesanoddoneinadorm,whosehabits,opinionsandbehaviorareweirdandobviouslydifferentfromothers.Gradually,thatdifficultpersonwillbetheonewhoalwayshaveconflictswithothers.GRADUATE:Thattrue.I’veeverhadaroommate.Hislifestylewasdifferentfromus,andheliketosleepearlyandgetupearly.Butforus,itwastooearly.Atthebeginning,wecanbearit,butlater,wefoundthathesnoredsoloudly,sometimeswecouldn’tatall.Itwashardbutwehavetobeasleepbeforehewenttosleep.Anotherroommatewassosensiblethathewasawakedallnigh.Therefore,theyfightforthistheotherday.STUDENT:Thiswasarallytypicalroommateconflict.HOST:…14/16HOST:…COLLEGEINSTRUCTORS:Itisthedifferencethatmakeswhoyouare,sothateveryoneisuniqueontheearth.Dormlifeisanimportantpartofthecollegelife.Itcanaffectyouonmanyaspects,suchasyourmood,habit,ideasandsoon.Soitissignificanttoliveinharmonywiththeroommates.Nobodyhastherighttoaskotherstochangeanything,includingtherehabits.Ifyourealizethatyourbehaviormaycauseconflictinthedorm,thenyoushouldmakeachoicetohavechange.Andtrytoreducethedifferences.PSYCHOLOGICALCOUNSELOR:Whatmakessomepeoplesoeasytorelateandotherssodifficult?Wearguethatconflictinarelationshipoccurswhentheemphasisisonthedifferences,ratherthanonthesimilarities.Thinkofitas“Unitedwestand,dividedwecan’tstandeachother.”Conflictoccurswhentheemphasisisondifference.Reducingdifferencescanturnconflictintocooperation.COLLEGEINSTRUCTORS:Roommatesshouldhavegoodcommunicationstogetabetterunderstanding,ratherthanmakepeopleunderstandyoufirst.Whentwoormorepeoplewanttobeheardandnooneiswillingtolisten,anargumentisinevitable.Listenandunderstandfirst,andyouunlockthedoorstopeople’sminds.15/16PSYCHOLOGICALCOUNSELOR:Yeah,totallyright.Thisisaboutthekindofunderstandingthatwillhelpyoucommunicateeffectively,preventfutureconflictandresolvecurrentconflictbeforeitgetsoutofhand.Thekindofunderstandingthatresultswhenyoucloselyexaminethedifficultbehavioruntilyoucanseethemotivebehindit.STUDENT:Livinginthesameroom,thereisnodoubtthatconflictswilloccur.Buttheconflictisnotamatterofprofitorbenefit.Itisalwaysaboutthebrokenpieces.Whentheconflicthappens,remembertohaveintrospection,andtrytobetolerantandgenerous.HOST:….
AUDIENCE:Whatyousayordotopeoplecanproducedefensivenessortrust,increaseresistanceorcooperation,promoteconflictorunderstanding.Itdependsonyou.Rememberthat“communication”hasthesameoriginsas“common”:tocommunicateistoestablishacommonunderstanding.Whilecommunicating,stayflexible.Whileyoucan’tchangepeopleyoumeet,youcancommunicatewiththeminsuchawaythattheychangethemselves.It’samatterofknowinghowtogetthroughtothemwhenthe
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