读后续写：个人成长自我突破类-Tara的小提琴之旅：不是每个孩子都该去游泳-有的灵魂在拉琴（讲义）-2025-2026学年高中英语作文复习

浙江省G5联盟高二上学期期中联考英语试题

阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Inmychildhood,Itriedmanyactivities,andmostofthemwerechosenby

Mom.Shewouldalwayssay,“Jointheswimteam,Tarq.Yoursisterisagood

swimmer,soyoushouldbetoo."Butshedidn'tknowthatIwasreallyscared

ofwater.Even[houghIwasafraid,Ihadtodothisactivitythatmademe

nervous.

EverySaturdaywasastruggle.IwouldaskMomwithallmyheartnollo

makemegototheswimmeet.ButmostofthetimeIdidn'tsucceed.Whenthe

startinggunwentoffwithaloudsound,Iwouldgatherallmycourageand

strengthandjumpintothecoldwater.IwouldswimasfaslasIcouldlo[he

olhersideofIhepool,butIwouldalwaysseetheotherswimmerspassme

easily.

ButIdidn'tgiveupcompletely.Thereasonwas|nydad.WhenIfinally

reachedihcedgeofthepooljtiredanddefeatecl^**^*udj-*■***»,hewouldbethere

withawarm,drytowel.Hewouldtellmethathewasproudofmyhardwork.

Hiswordsandpresencewerelikealifebuoj,keepingmecoinginthis

uncertainsituation现4分词赃语做件随动作）.

Then,abigturningpointcame.Ourschoolorchestracametoourclass

andgaveaperformance.Thedrumswcrcjustannoying,andthefluteswere

boring.ButwhenIheard【hevioli*..oh,thatwasdifferent.Itmadethemost

beautifulsoundIhadeverheard.Myheartstartedtodancewithitsmelody.

Forthefirsttimeinmylife,Iwas[cryhappy.Andwhat'smore,the

orchestradirectorgavemeapermissionslip（许可单）formyparentstosign,

1

askingmetotryoutforthefirstseatinthecommunityorchestra现在分词败语做件电动

*>.Thiswasanewstart,aglimmerofhopeinajourneythathadbeenfullof

challengesanduncertainties.

注意:1.续写词数应为150左右；

2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

Paragraph1:Tightlyholdingthepermissionslip,Iranallthewayhomeafterschool.

Paragraph2:Finallycamethetryoutforthefirstseat.

浙江省G5联盟2024-2025学年高二上学期期中联考英语试题

阅读下面材料，根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段，使之构成一篇完整的短文。

Inmychildhood,Itriedmanyactivities,andmostofthemwerechosenby

Mom.Shewouldalwayssay,“Jointheswimteam,Tara.Yoursisterisagood

swimmer,soyoushouldbetoo."Butshedidn'tknowthatIwasreallyscaredof

water.EventhoughIwasafraid,Ihadtodothisactivitythatmademenervous.

EverySaturdaywasastruggle.IwouldaskMomwithallmyheartnotto

makemegoto（heswimmeet.ButmostofthetimeIdidn'tsucceed.Whenthe

startinggunwentoffwithaloudsound,Iwouldgatherallmycourageand

strengthandjumpintothecoldwater.IwouldswimasfastasIcouldtothe

othersideofthepool,butIwouldalwaysseetheotherswimmerspassme

easily.

ButIdidn'tgiveupcompletely.Thereasonwasmydad.WhenIfinally

reachedtheedgeofthepool,tiredanddefeated,hewouldbetherewithawarm,

drytowel.Hewouldtellmethathewasproudofmyhardwork.Hiswordsand

presencewerelikealifebuoy,keepingmegoinginthisuncertainsituation.

Then,abigturningpointcame.Ourschoolorchestra（管弦乐队）cameto

ourclassandgaveaperformance.Thedrumswerejustannoying,andtheflutes

wereboring.ButwhenIheardtheviolin...oh,thatwasdifferent.Itmadethe

mostbeautifulsound1hadeverheard.Myheartstartedtodancewithits

melody.

Forthefirsttimeinmylife,Iwasveryhappy.Andwhat'smore,the

orchestradirectorgavemeapermissionslip（许可单）formyparentstosign,

askingmetotryoutforthefirstseatinthecommunityorchestra.Thiswasa

newstart,aglimmerofhopeinajourneythathadbeenfullofchallengesand

uncertainties.

注意：1.续写词数应为15（）左右；

2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

ParagraphI:Tightlyholdingthepermissionslip,Iranallthewayhomeafterschool.

Paragraph2:Finallycamethetryoutforthefirstseat.

一、文章分类与续写思路分析

文章类型：个人成长/自我突破类读后续写

特点：以主人公的心理变化和成长经历为主线，描写克服困难、寻找兴趣

和自信的过程。

续写目标：展现主人公在音乐领域的新尝试，以及心理成长的进一步升华。

续写思路与构建方法：

布局与框架

Paragraph1:事件衔接与情感铺垫（拿到许可单后的激动与期待，

回家向父母展示）

Paragraph!:高潮与自我突破（试奏的紧张、努力与收获，心理

成长的升华）

框架提炼

起：紧握许可单一激动、期待一决心尝试

承：回家与父母沟通一父母鼓励

转：试奏前的紧张与心理活动一进入试奏

合：成功或初步表现一对自我能力的认可与心理成长

实施策略

承接原文情节：延续主人公的成长线索和对父母关爱的描写

巧妙设计细节：心理描写、动作描写、环境渲染（如音乐教室、试

奏氛围）

保持词汇和句式自然

续写注意事项：

承接原文情绪变化（从害怕一激动一紧张—自信）

每段首句应与所给开头紧密相关

描写细节应体现心理与动作的结合

二、文章故事山模式与伏笔分析

分析角度内容原文反应句

分析角度内容原文反应句

“Eventhough1wasafraid,Ihadtodo

thisactivitythatmademenervous?,

起：害怕水一执行父母安排

“WhenIfinallyreachedtheedgeofthe

承：父亲鼓励一»不放弃

故事山pool,tiredanddefeated,hewouldbe

转折：发现对小提琴的兴趣一therewithawarm,drytowel.”

模式

新希望“Myheartstartedtodancewithits

melody.”

合：获得许可单一准备尝试

“Theorchestradirectorgavemea

pennissionslip…

Paragraph1:许可单t激动回“Tightlyholdingthepermissionslip,I

衔接原文ranallthewayhomeafterschool?,

家

的点“Finallycamethetryoutforthefirst

Paragraph2:试奏—>心理成长

seat.”

紧张、害怕、期待、兴奋、激"EventhoughIwasafraid...

心情描写“Myheartstartedtodancewithits

动

melody.”

“Iwouldgatherallmycourageand

游泳动作、跑回家、练习乐器、strengthandjumpintothecoldwater?,

动作描写

试奏“Tightlyholdingthepermissionslip,I

ranallthewayhome…”

"Myheartstartedtodancewithits

关键转折melody.”

发现音乐兴趣一获得许可单

点“Theorchestradirectorgavemea

permissionslip…”

伏笔/隐含对父母鼓励的依赖一内心自“Hiswordsandpresencewerelikea

lifebuoy,keepingmegoinginthis

线索我认同的萌芽

uncertainsituation.

,

害怕游泳一想尝试但怕失“Iwasreallyscaredofwater.,

冲突点“Thedrumswerejustannoying,and

败；新乐器挑战

thefluteswereboring,^^

分析角度内容原文反应句

“Hewouldtellmethathewasproudof

父亲鼓励一尝试小提琴一myhardwork.”

解决方案

参加试奏“Theorchestradirectorgavemea

permissionslip...”

害怕、焦虑->激劫一紧张“EventhoughIwasafraid...

心理描写“Myheartstartedtodancewithits

一自信

melody.”

“Jumpintothecoldwater.^^

环境描写游泳池的冷水、乐团表演氛围“Ourschoolorchestracametoour

classandgaveaperfbrmance.”

“But1didn'tgiveupcompletely.The

从恐惧/焦虑一被鼓励一兴reasonwasmydad.”

情感转折

趣萌发一自信尝试“Forthefirsttimeinmylife,Iwas

veryhappy.”

游泳池一家—音乐教室/试“Iranallthewayhomeafterschool.

空间转换“Finallycamethetryoutforthefirst

奏场所

seat.”

周末游冰T乐团表演一拿“EverySaturdaywasastruggle.M

时间过渡

到许可单->试奏“Then,abigturningpointcame.”

三、续写策略

承接原文

紧握许可单一回家一父母鼓励

从发现兴趣到实际尝试T内心变化的自然过渡

设计技巧

心理描写与动作描写结合：如紧张的手指、快速心跳、深呼吸

场景渲染：音乐教室的氛围、同学与老师的反应

情感线：父母鼓励一自信一对未来的期待

伏笔与呼应

原文父亲鼓励一后续自信尝试

原文对小提琴的兴趣一试奏表现一心理成长

3.动作、心理、环境描写

A.动作描写

1clenchedmyfiststightly,determinednottogiveup.

―我紧握双拳，决心不放弃。

Itiptoedintothemusicroom,carefulnottomakeasound.

―我踮起脚走进音乐教室，小心不发出声音。

MyhandstrembledslightlyasIheldtheviolin.

T当我拿起小提琴时，手微微颤抖。

Isprinteddownthecorridor,eagertoshowmyparentsthepermissionslip.

―我飞奔在走廊上，迫不及待想把许可单给父母看。

Itookadeepbreathandliftedthebowtoplaythefirstnote.

T我深吸一口气，举起弓准备拉响第一音符。

Iswallowednervously,tryingtocalmmyracingheart.

―我紧张地咽了口口水，努力让心跳平复。

1balancedcarefullyontheedgeofthepool,hesitatingbeforejumpingin.

―我小心地站在泳池边缘，犹豫是否跳下去。

Ifidgetedwiththesheetmusic,adjustingituntilitwasjustright.

―我摆弄着乐谱，一遍遍调整到合适的位置。

Itiptoedpastmysister'sroom,notwantingtowakeher.

―我踮着脚经过妹妹的房间，不想吵醒她。

Iclutchedthetowelmyfatherhandedme,feelingcomforted.

―我紧握父亲递给我的毛巾，感到安慰。

B.心理描写

Ifeltasurgeofexcitementrunningthroughmybody.

一我全身涌起一股激动。

AnxietygnawedatmeasIapproachedthestage.

—►当我走向舞台时，焦虑感在心里蔓延。

ReliefwashedovermewhenIfinallyfinishedtheswim.

T当我终于游完时，一股轻松感涌上心头。

Iwasfilledwithanticipationforwhatwasabouttohappen.

T我充满了对即将发生的事情的期待。

Prideswelledinmychestatmysmallachievement.

―我为自己的小小成就感到自豪。

MyheartsankwhenIrealizedIhadmadeamistake.

T当我意识到自己犯错时，心都沉了下去。

NervousnessprickledmyskinasIpreparedtoperform.

一当我准备表演时，紧张感像针刺般蔓延全身。

Aglimmerofhopesparkedinsideme.

T内心闪现出一丝希望的光芒。

Ifeltutterlydefeated,yetdeterminedtotryagain.

―我感到彻底失败，但仍决心再试一次。

ExcitementandfearmingledasIsteppedontothestage.

T当我踏上舞台时，激动与害怕交织在一起。

C,环境描写

Themusicroomwasfilledwithawarm,goldenlight.

一音乐教室里充满温暖的金色光线。

Thepoolwatershimmeredunderthebrightsunlight.

T游泳池的水在明亮的阳光下闪闪发光c

Theauditoriumechoedwiththesoundoftheorchestra.

一礼堂里回荡着管弦乐队的声音。

Thehallwaywassilentexceptfortheechoofmyfootsteps.

一走廊里除了我脚步声的回响，静悄悄的。

RaindropstappedlightlyonthewindowasIpracticedindoors.

一当我在室内练习时，雨滴柱轻敲打窗户。

Thestagelightscastlongshadowsacrossthewoodenfloor.

—►舞台灯光在木地板上投下长长的影子。

Theclassroomsmelledfaintlyofpolishedwoodandmusicsheets.

T教室里弥漫着一丝擦过的木头和乐谱的味道。

Thepooldeckwasslipperyandcoldundermyfeet.

T泳池边甲板湿滑而冰冷。

Sunlightstreamedthroughthetallwindows,illuminatingtheroom.

一阳光透过高高的窗户，照亮整个房间。

Thequietmurmuroftheaudiencefilledtheconcerthall.

T音乐厅里充满观众低声的窃窃私语。

D.常见单词高级替换词（5个场景分类）

场景常用词高级替换词

心情/心理happydelighted,oveijoyed,elated,thrilled,ecstatic

心情/心理saddevastated,heartbroken,despondent,melancholic,gloomy

动作runsprint,dash,race,bolt,hurry

形容事物beautifulexquisite,stunning,enchanting,magnificent,splendid

努力/尝试tryattempt,endeavor,strive,venture,undertake

4.搭配现象、固定搭配与语料积累

A.常见搭配

clutch/tightlyclutchsomething—►紧握某物

swimacrossthepool—游过泳池

filledwith+emotion—充满....情绪

proudof+someone/something—>为...感到自豪

asurgeof+emotion—»一股...的情感涌上心头

steponto+place—►走上....（舞台、场地）

tiptoeinto+room—»踮脚走进....

nervousabout+doingsomething—»因...感至《紧张

washover+someone—>（情感）涌上心头

sparkinsidesomeone一激起内心某种感受

B.可积累生词短语

单词/短词

词意近义词反义词例句

语性

1.1willendeavortofinish

尝试，attempt,strive,giveup,myhomeworkbeforedinner.

endeavorn./v.

努力undertakeneglect2.Scientistsendeavortofind

acureforthedisease.

1.Agleamofhopeappeared

闪光，shine,glimmer,inhereyes.

gleamn./v.dim,fade

微光sparkle2.Thesungleamedonthe

watersurface.

1.MyhandstrembledasI

shake,quiver,steady,openedtheenvelope.

tremblev.颤抖

shivercalm2.Hetrembledwithfear

beforethetest.

1.Hisencouragement

buoyedmeupduring

浮标；sink,

buoyn.support,upliftdifficulttimes.

v.支持depress

2.Theboatwasbuoyedby

thewaves.

1.Sheclenchedherteethin

release,anger.

clenchV.紧握grasp,grip

loosen2.1clenchedmyfiststightly

beforethecompetition.

rush,wave,1.Asurgeofexcitementran

surgen./v.汹涌；recede,ebb

swellthroughthecrowd.

单词/短词

词意近义词反义词例句

语性

涌起2.Angersurgedinsidehim.

1.Aglimmerofhope

微光，gleam,flicker,darkness,appeared.

glimmern./v.

闪烁sparklefade2.Starsglimmeredinthe

nightsky.

1.1tiptoedintotheroom

stomp,quietly.

tiptoeV.踮脚走sneak,creep

march2.Shetiptoedpastthe

sleepingbaby.

1.Climbingthemountain

令人畏intimidating,easy,seemeddaunting.

dauntingadj.

惧的formidablesimple2.Thetaskaheadwas

dauntingbutexciting.

1.Shewaselatedat

兴高采thrilled,depressed,receivingtheaward.

elatedadj.

烈的ovcijoyedsad2.1feltelatedwhenIsolved

theproblem.

四、PossibleVersion(4)

Version1

Paragraph1:

Ti研心holdingthepermissionslip,/ranallthehomeafterschool.My

heartpoundednotfromtherunning,butfromamixtureof|vildexcitementand

gnawinganxiet.1心理人物权力发耳,.Burslingihroughihedoor，观在分切线语做停障动作),Ihandedherthe

crumpledslip.Hereyebrowsfurrowed"Theorchestra?Tara.we'veinvestedsomuch

timeinswimming.Thisis...unexpected."Justthen.Dadwalkedin,sensingthe

tension©分做'Hepickeduptheslipandhiseyeslitup."Firstseattryout?That's

fantasiij!"heexclaimed.Momlookedatmypleadingeyes,thenatDad'ssupportive

smile,andfinally,hersternexpressionsoftenedintoathoughtfulone无星士语句).She

signedtheslipwithasigh.Thatevening.Ibeganmynewjourneywithhiypassion.

Paragraph2:

Fi〃allycamethe仔MIUforthefirstseat.Backstage,myhandswereclammyand

theviolinfeltforeign.Iclosedmyeyes,rnmemberinLDad'sreassuringsmile叱分包也

泽被件处动作，.lakingadeepbreathi.在分词学注利许心动作、Iwalkedontothestage.Underthe

brighllights,Iliftedtheviolintomychin.As(hebowtouchedihestrings(无灵士将Y、the

beautifulmelodythathadoncecapturedmysoulflowedoutfreely无天上话句,.When[he

】a"notefaded,thesilencewasbrokenbywarmapplause.Ididn'tneedtohearrhe

resultrightthen.Inthatmoment,Ihadalreadywonthemostimportantbattle一the

oneagainstmyowndoubts.IhadfinallyfoundastagewhereIdidn7haveto

struggletokeepafloat,butcouldtrulysoar.

Version2

Paragraph1:

TiwhUvholdingDennissionslip、/allthewayhomeafterschool.This

pieceofpaperfeltlikealifebuoy,notiustkeepingmeafloatinuncertainty,but

offeringadirectiontoanewshore.Iburstintotheroomandcouldn'twaittotell

mymymom."Anotheractivity?"Momsaid,hertonelacedwithskepticism技〃痴.

"Tar|,Quittingswimmingnowwouldbeawaste."ThenIlookedatDac|wilh

pleadingeyes.Hegavemeanreassuringnod,hissilentwayoftellin〉metofight

myownbattlc，HN立痴."Mom,"Isaid,myvoicetremblingbutclear•立土格，,"inthepool,

Iswimoutoffearofdisappointingyou.ButwhenIplaytheviolin,itfeelslike...

PleaseJustgivemethisonechancetoprovemyself.'Thekitchenwassilent.Slowly,

shereachedforthepen,sivninRhername.在分工做体品动曲.Fromthatdayon,Ithrew

myselfintopracticingtheviolin,fueledbypassionandforthetriout，过去分耳做原因不语).

Paragraph2:

Finallycamethet/youtforthefirstseat.Theauditoriumwasintimidating.AsI

waitedformytuni,Isawtheothercandidates,theirconfidenceseemingtodwarf

myownittAi.*..Whenmynamewascalled,Iwalkedtothecenterstage.Iimagined

Dadintheaudience,withhiswarm,drytowelandproudsmilf.Ibegantoplay.

Themusicstartedsoftly,ahesitantwhisper,thengrewinstrengthandpassion,

tellingastoryofstniBgleandthenpassioinQ分迷做伴其咕作).Ipouredeverybitofmy

journeyintothemusic.AsIplayedihnfinalnote,Iopenedmyeyes,nottoseeifI

hadwon,buttoacknowledgethatIhad,forthefirsttime,trulyexpressedwhoI

wasandwhoIwantedtobe.

Version3

Paragraph1

TightlyholdingtheDemissionsliu,[remallthewayhomeafterschool.As

soonasIbu「sithrough（hedoor,myheartpoundingwithexcitement•立上格用.人物）,I

wavedthepaperinfrontofMomandDad."CanItryoutfbrtheschoolorchestra?^^I

askedbreathlessly.Foramoment,Momlookedsuiprised.Shehadalwaysimagined

meintheswimmingpool,notonastag|.Dadsmiledgentlyandnodded,saying,夏在分方

做件改动作，,“Ifthat'syvhatyoutrulylove,gofbrThatnight,Isatbymybedroom

window,tracingthelinesofthepermissionslipacainandaeain现在分露皖话世停除动作）.The

memoryofcoldpoolwaterfaded,replacedbythesoftechoofviolinpracticedays

andnights，过去分词稣请做“果状语，.Ipromisedmyselfthatthistime,Iwouldplaynotto

win—buttoexpressw/z。/was.

Paragraph2

cametheforthefirstseat.卜I\palmsweresweating|asIwalked

intothehall,filledwithnervouswhispersandshininginstruments过去分穗短语做件"动作＞.

'lakingadeepbreath，■分外m”做停.制，,Iliftedthebow,lettingthemusicflowthrough

me.,现在分河版语做体★动作,Thenotesweren'tperfect,buttheywerehonestandalive.Asihe

lastsoundfaded,silencefilledtheroomthencamegentleapplauseThe

directorsmiledapprovingly.Inthatmoment,IrealizedIhadfoundsomethingfar

morevaluablethanamedal:confidence.WhenIsle叩edoulofihehall,sunlight

warmedmyface.Forthefirsttime,I|feliproud-notbecauseIhadfollowedothers,

butbecauseIhadfollowedmyheart.

逻辑分析与衔接说明

段落逻辑内容概要衔接关系

兴奋回家，展示许可单，父

第一段从“跑回家”T“情感确认与决定”

母支持，内心转折

第二段试奏现场，紧张一释放一自与第一段结尾的"playnottowin”逻辑承

段落逻辑内容概要彳行接关系

接，体现心理成长

亮点表达与语法点

非谓语结构：Tightlyholdingthepermissionslip...

倒装结构：Nottowin—buttoexpresswhoIwas.

地道搭配与短语：

burstthroughthedoor（冲进门）

tracethelinesofthepermissionslip（反复描摹许可单）

letthemusicflowthroughme（让音乐流淌于心）

findsomethingfarmorevaluablethana〃屋"，〃（找到比奖牌更珍贲的

东西）

情绪描写亮点：

heartpoundingwithexcitement（激动得心跳加速）

palmsweresweating（手心冒汗）

sunlightwarmedmyface（阳光温暖检■庞）

高分语料积累与替换

词/短语高级替换同义词/联想词例句

thrilled/elated/Shewasthrilledtobepartof

exciteddelighted,ecstatic

overjoyedtheteam.

apprehensive,Hefeltuneasybeforehis

nervousanxious/uneasy/tense

jitteryperformance.

content/fulfilled/Shefeltfulfilledafteryearsof

proudsatisfied,pleased

gratifiedeffort.

encourage/backup/Myparentsalwaysstandby

supportassist,favor

standbyme.

trvoutaudition/competefor/attempt,enterSheauditionedfortheschool

词/短语高级替换同义词/联想词例句

applyfororchestra.

Version4

Paragraph1

Tightlyholdin史thepennissionslip、Iranallthewayhomeafterschool.Along

theway,Ibarelynoticedthewindbrushingpastmyface.Ishouted"Mom,Dad!Look

whatIgotV",wavingtheslip理&分词政痔做件吆动作）.Momfrownedslightly,hervoice

〃/立士格创域人物〉.“Music?Areyousure,Tara?”Ihesitated,butDad'swarmgaze

gavemecourage."She'sfoundhertunc/hesaidsoftly.Thatnight,asIpiacticcd

withaborrowedviolin,theroughstringsleftmarksonmyfingers.Yetthe

sound—fragilebutreal—filledmewithaquietjoy.Irealizedthateverynote

carriedmystory,mycourage,andmylongingtohemyself.

Paragraph2

Finallycamethetryoutforthefirstseat.Thehallwasfilledwithtensionand

whispers.Myfingerstreinbled|asIheldthebow,recallingm\father's分词做什

随m作，.Iclosedmyeyesandbegantoplay.Thefirstfewnoteswavered,thengrew

stronger,steadier-likemyheartbeat光灵士语4n.WhenIfinished,|thcdirectornodded

approvingly,andIcaughtsightofmyparentssmilinginthebackrow.Atthat

moment,tearsblurredmyvision.Thewaterthatonceterrifiedmehadtaughtme

endurance;themusicnowtaughtmecourage.Iknew,atlast,Iwasnotswimming

awayfromfear-Iwasswimmingtowardmydream.

第一段结尾与第二段首句衔接自然：

“everynotecarriedmystory”—>"begantoplay”一体现音乐线与心理线的

承接。

暗线呼应：游泳经历(fear)一音乐(courage)一成长(self-identity)

亮点词汇与短语

barelynoticingthewindbrushingpastmyface（风掠过脸庞，渲染速度与情

绪）

roughstringsleftmarksonmyfingers（象征坚持）

filledwithaquiet（内敛的幸福）

tensionandwhispers（紧张氛围）

tearsblurredmyvision（泪水模糊了视线）

语料与替换积累

原词高级替换同义/联想例句

solid,Hervoicegrewfirmasshe

strongpowerful/firm/steady

forcefulspoke.

unease,Sheconqueredherfearof

fearanxiety/dread/terror

panicfailure.

bravery/determination/Ittookg