09写 作讲义.doc

one must make regular practice. 不定式短语的逻辑主语决不是regular practice，为了把逻辑关系表达清楚，要么把不定式短语改成If one wants to improve his writing skill，要么把主句改成one must make regular practice.4表示相同的意思，是否用了平行语法结构 例 10 a) With the computer, one can do shopping, banking and read at home. b) With the computer, one can do shopping, banking and reading at home. can do shopping, banking and read at home, 用语法平行结构来衡量，用动词原形 read是不妥的，为了和 do shopping, do banking 保持结构上平行，接下来的一个内容要用do reading. 例 11 a) Nowadays, people not only eat enough food, but also eat better. b) Nowadays, people not only eat more, but also eat better. 用 not only.but also, both.and, whether.or, either.or, as well as, along with等能连接两个成分的连词，前后两个成分在结构上要保持一致。用 eat enough food, eat better不如用 eat more, eat better，都用副词。 例 12 a) Participating in sports is good for our physical health, and through it we can also train our character. b) Participating in sports is good for our physical health, and it is also beneficial to our character-training. 在说同样的事时，相邻的句子尽可能在语法结构上保持一致。5用代词时，指代是否清楚 例13 a) Sometimes teachers will inform students of the heavy burden they have to bear. b) Sometimes a teacher will inform students of the heavy burden he has to bear. they 即可指代teachers, 也可指代 students，明显的是指代不清。其实只要把其中一个名词变成单数，用he和 they分别代不同的名词，就清楚了。因为 a teacher也可泛指所有教师。 例14 a) Someone believes that the teachers task is to give students knowledge, which may not be true. b) Someone believes that the teachers task is to give students knowledge, a notion which may not be true. which指代什么不清楚，指 knowledge，还是指前面整个句子？如果指 Someone believes，最好用 a notion或an idea归纳一下整个句子的意思，然后引出从句。 例15 a) People have been fighting against the influence of TV commercials, but it often proves useless. b）People have been fighting against the influence of TV commercials, but the effort often proves useless.it 指什么？如指influence，则在 it often proves useless 这个句子中显然不通。写作人知道it指人们的努力，但effort 这个词前面没有出现过，就不能用it。6 相邻的句子，是否避免了不必要的结构转变 例16 a) While we reduce the number of vehicles, the speed of traffic can be increased. b) While the number of vehicles is reduced, the speed of traffic is increased. 两个非常相关的意思，不要一个使用主动结构，一个使用被动结构。 例17 a) Each of us may take a part-time job to help support ourselves, but if you spend too much time on it, your study will be affected. b) Each of us may take a part-time job to help support ourselves, but too much time spent on it, our studies will be affected. 前半句用each of us和ourselves，后半句却用you和 your study，应一致起来。7可数名词与不可数名词是否用得正确 例18 a) TV presents us with many useful informations. b) TV presents us with a lot of useful information 还有evidence, advice, knowledge等都是不可数名词，都不能用复数。另外， many, a great number of, another, few 等只能与可数名词配用。而a great amount of, a great deal of, less, much, 等应与不可数名词配用。 例19 a) Making our cities greener is not an easy work. b) Making our cities greener is not an easy job. work 用作可数名词是作品这类意思，而表示工作时，不可数。同样，在 Word has been sent out that those who cheat on exams will be punished.这个句子中，要用单数word表示信息。 例20 a）Each people has his own opportunities. b) Each person has his own opportunities. people作人民、人们解时，是集体名词，不能与each配用。 a people或 peoples表示民族、国家。在正式语体中也不能说 less people，而应说 few people。8冠词是否用得正确 例21 a) Book knowledge is important, but we should also learn something in the society. b) Book knowledge is important, but we should also learn something in society. 用定冠词the, 是特指意义，而这里没有这个特指意义。同样，在When I was in the high school, I always have a beautiful picture of the college life 中，两个the都应去掉。 例22 a) If there were no electric power, we would have to do everything by the hands. b) If there were no electric power, we would have to do everything by hand. 表示用手 (by hand), 走路 (on foot), 上课 (in class), 上学 (go to school), 住院 (at hospitable)等，都不用定冠词。 例23 a) If there were no electric power, factory would stop producing goods, car, bus and train would stop running. b) If there were no electric power, factories would stop producing goods; cars, buses and trains would stop running. 用可数名词时，要么前面有冠词（the, a, an)或代词(his, her, my), 要么以复数形成出现。不能像中文名词那样没有语法变化。9句子的主谓宾是否齐全。 例24 a) TV now plays an important role in our daily life, Because we cannot live without it. b) TV now plays an important role in our daily life. because we cannot live without it. 中文用因为引出的句子可以独立，但英语不行，作为从句，只能附属主句。 例25 a) There are many ways to contact with society. For example, join in clubs, taking parttime jobs and helping the poor. b) There are many ways to contact with society, for example, joining clubs, taking parttime jobs and helping the poor. for example 引出的应是句子，如 For example we may join clubs, take part-time jobs and help the poor。有时也可不自立为句，跟在一个句子后面，借用主语。 例26 a) If no electricity, all activities such as watching TV and seeing movies will be impossible. b) If there is no electricity, all activities such as watching TV and seeing movies will be impossible. if no electricity（如果没有电），但句中的no不是动词，也就是说这个从句缺了谓语。10过渡词是否用得合适 例27 a) Because some college graduates could not find a better job, so they decided to continue to read for a second degree. b) As come college graduates could not find a better job, they decided to continue to read for a second degree. 汉语可以说 因为.所以, 但英语不能连用because.so. 例28 a) Although an opportunity is rare, but we must be ready to seize it. b) Although an opportunity is rare, we must be ready to seize it. 同样，汉语可以说虽然.但日，而英语要么用although,要么用 but, 两者不能同时用。11词语的搭配是否正确 例29 a) We students should learn/study as much knowledge as possible. b) We students should acquire/obtain as much knowledge as possible. 学习知识是考生作文中经常要表达的，但不少人用错。英语中能和knowledge 搭配的是obtain, acquire, gain等。 例30 a) With a rise in the number of cars and buses, traffic in Shanghai has become more and more crowded. b) With a rise in the number of cars and buses, traffic in Shanghai has become increasingly heavier. traffic不和 crowded搭配，说 交通拥挤繁忙，应说 traffic is heavy/busy.如同中文里的速度快，英语不说 The speed of cars is fast/quick. 而是说The speed of cars is high/fantastic.或cars are much faster. 例31 a) People begin to eat more vice food. b) People begin to eat more non-staple foodstuff. 副总统是vice presidents, 副食品应是 non-staple foodstuff, 而副经理、副教授、副作用分别是 assistant managers, associate professors, side effects，搭配不同。12词语是否用得得当 例32 a) Actually, traffic jams have effected our daily life. b) Actually, traffic jams have affected our daily life. 表示不良影响，动词用affect, 而不是effect。 例33 a) When old problems are solved, new problems will rise. b) When old problems are solved, new problems will arise. rise 是起来、上升的意思，arise 才是出现的意思。 例34 a) There are many factors leading to changes in peoples diet. At first, people can afford expensive food. b) There are many factors leading to changes in peoples diet. First, people can afford expensive food. At first 是起先的意思，暗示后来情况完全两样。表示首先，要用first。就如 highly 和 high 是两个同的意思，前者是作非常解，后者是高的意思。Women have risen high in social status.不能用 highly。13是否重复使用了表示意思的词语 例35 a) In my opinion, I believe the present educational system is in need of reform. b) In my opinion, the present education system is in need of reform. I believe 的意思已包括在In my opinion 里了，用一个就可以了。 例36 a) The reason why people choose to live in the country is because there is no pollution nor noise there. b) The reason why people choose to live in the country is that there is no pollution nor noise there. reason, why, because 都是指同一意思。至少要去掉一个。 例37 a) People try to find a solution to solve the problem. b) People try to find a solution to the problem.14 介词是否用得正确 例38 a) After four years, we all graduated from college and entered society. b) Four years later, we all graduated from college and entered society. 用过去时时，表示四年以后，应用four years later，而不是 after four years。用于表示将来的四年后，也不用after，而是用介词 in，如We will all graduate in four years。 例39 a) Many college students have a strong desire to be independent on their parents. b) Many college students have a strong desire to be independent of their parents. 依靠的意思是用dependent on，但不依赖、独立却要用 independent of。15词性是否用得正确 例40 a) The computer like TV, it has both advantages and disadvantages. b) Like TV, the computer has both advantages and disadvantages. 表示像，like是一个介词，这里误作了动词。 例41 a) Obviously, our country would stop develop if no electricity. b) Obviously, our country would stop developing in there were no electricity. 这里，develop 应该用动名词developing，而且 no不是动词，说没有，应当用 there is not (no) 或have (has) not 例42 a) Riding bicycles conveniences my work. b) Riding bicycles is convenient to my work. convenience 不是动词。表示方便，可用be convenient to的结构。 16句子是否有明确的主语 例43 a) Unlike the movie, TV shows on continuously, and doesnt need to pay an extra money. b) Unlike the movie, TV shows on continuously, and one doesnt need to pay an extra money. doesnt need to pay an extra money 的主语是什么？显然不是TV。汉语可以说：电视可以一直看下去，无需再花什么钱。把主语省去，但英语一定要有明确的主语。 例44 a) Too easy or too difficult is no good for us. b) The books which are too easy or too difficult are no good for us. Too easy or too difficult是形容词短语，不能作主语，尽管汉语可以说太容易或太难对我们都不利。因此，加上The books which are，主语就有了。 例45 a) Reading books can acquire knowledge. b) Through reading one can acquire knowledge. 看上去句子有了主语：Reading books，但这是假主语，因为acquire knowledge 的主语需是人。汉语的主语和谓语的关系可以是主题和评论的关系，可以说读书能获得知识。但英语不行，一定要有逻辑主谓关系。17一个句子是否确保只有一个动词 例46 a) People think go to the movie will cost a lot of money. b) People think that going to the movie will cost them a lot of money. 汉语一个句子里可以集结几个动词，形成连动结构：到那里去看电影响或兼语结构叫我去看电影，但英语不能这样用。 例47 a) There are many people take part in sports and games now. b) Many people take part in sports and games now. 同样，汉语可以说：有许多人参加体育活动。但英语一个句子只能保留主要动词，或用从句动词：There are many people who take part in sports and games now.。 例48 a) Although difficulty is exist, but we can overcome it. 正：Although difficulty does exist, we can overcome it. 困难是存在的，英语不能用is exist。（顺便指出，用了Although，就不能用but。） 18表达是否符合英语的习惯 英语不仅在语言上有差异，在文化上也有不同。英语有某种说法，汉语里不一定有一模一样的说法。好多东西是汉语特有的，英语是无法表达的或我们还无法表达。碰到这种情况，我们采取放弃的办法，要是像例49所示的几个句子那样，硬要表达，不仅意思不清，还会闹出笑话。 例49 a) We should put out hearts into the study. b) We young people are now living in sugar water. a) In a society where men are heavy and women are light, women cannot enjoy full equality. a) People set off firecrackers to congratulate the red and white happy things. a) We should advocate five talks and four beauties. 这五个句子都是中国式英语，请读者修改成地道的英语。第八部分 写作单项训练（Exercises 1-7)Exercise 11. Choose the word that best completes the sentence: 1) John was _ (lying, laying) in the sun while Jack was _ (lying, laying) bricks. 2) If the cost of living _ (raises, rises), the company will _ (raise, rise) the wages. 3) The brain needs a _ (continuous, continual) supply of blood. 4) There are no _ (empty, vacant) positions in the company. 5) Considerable progress has been _ (made, done) in domestic science. 6) In the 18th century _ (emigrants, immigrants, migrants) poured into America. 7) _ (Last, At last) the spring has come after a long winter. 8) English is the _ (native, mother) tongue of most Americans. 9) The mountain hotel offered magnificent _ (views, scenes). 10) He spoke to his father _ (respectably, re