2022年全国1卷读后续写David'sRun分析故事讲义-高三英语二轮复习写作专项

真题原文Itwasthedayofthebigcrosscountryrun.Studentsfromsevendifferentprimaryschoolsinandaroundthesmalltownwerewarmingupandwalkingtheroute（路线）throughthickevergreenforest.

IlookedaroundandfinallyspottedDavid,whowasstandingbyhimselfofftothesidebyafence.Hewassmallfortenyearsold.Hisusualbigtoothysmilewasabsenttoday.Iwalkedoverandaskedhimwhyhewasn'twiththeotherchildren.Hehesitatedandthensaidhehaddecidednottorun.

Whatwaswrong?Hehadworkedsohardforthisevent!Iquicklysearchedthecrowdfortheschool'scoachandaskedhimwhathadhappened."Iwasafraidthatkidsfromotherschoolswouldlaughathim,"heexplainedunfortably."Igavehimthechoicetorunornot,andlethimdecide."Ibitbackmyfrustration（懊恼）.Iknewthecoachmeantwell—hethoughthewasdoingtherightthing.AftermakingsurethatDavidcouldrunifhewanted,Iturnedtofindhimingtowardsme,hissmallbodyrockingfromsidetosideasheswunghisfeetforward.

Davidhadabraindiseasewhichpreventedhimfromwalkingorrunninglikeotherchildren,butatschoolhisclassmatesthoughtofhimasaregularkid.Healwaysparticipatedtothebestofhisabilityinwhatevertheyweredoing.ThatwaswhynoneofthechildrenthoughtitunusualthatDavidhaddecidedtojointhecrosscountryteam.Itjusttookhimlonger—that’sall.Davidhadnotmissedasinglepractice,andalthoughhealwaysfinishedhisrunlongaftertheotherchildren,hedidalwaysfinish.Asaspecialeducationteacherattheschool,IwasfamiliarwiththechallengesDavidfacedandwasproudofhisstrongdetermination.注意：1.续写词数应为150左右；2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答.

Wesatdownnexttoeachother,butDavidwouldn'tlookatme.

IwatchedasDavidmoveduptothestartinglinewiththeotherrunners.分析故事根据故事山模型，我们来分析故事的情节脉络。故事背景：故事一、二段交代了背景，包括故事的时间、地点、人物、事件等。举办大型越野赛的日子开始，涉及来自不同学校的学生。主人公是一位特殊教育老师，注意到戴维站在一边，发现他选择不参赛，因为害怕被嘲笑。故事开端：触发事件发生三、四段在老师从教练那里得知戴维被给予参赛与否的选择，突显了教练的善意和戴维对被接纳的挣扎。情节发展：第五段故事进一步发展，老师对教练的决定感到沮丧，试图理解戴维的观点。故事高潮：高潮发生在第六段，情节到达了最让人期待的时刻，David是否会参加比赛这件事成了本文最大悬念。通过对David的侧面描写，体现了他的不屈不挠的精神，也暗示了下文David会参加比赛这件事。原文分析之后，我们还需要结合题目所给的两段首句来分析故事的走向。Wesatdownnexttoeachother,butDavidwouldn'tlookatme.

IwatchedasDavidmoveduptothestartinglinewiththeotherrunners.从第一句我们可以看出作者将会在这一段展开交谈，根据前文的描述我们得知作者是希望David不要轻言放弃，所以在这一段需要描写的是作者如何鼓舞、劝说David参加这次比赛。从第二句我们可以看出David正冲向终点，因此可以得知David被作者说服，勇敢的参加了比赛，我们也可以推测虽然他身体状况不佳，不能取得特别突出的成绩，但是大家肯定会对David的精神给予肯定。（当然，文章最后大家不要忘记升华故事的主旨哦！）因此故事山的后半部分我们分析如下：情节回落：情节回落随着戴维的参与展开，强调了他的决心和支持的氛围。老师反思了戴维面临的挑战和他周围人的积极影响。故事结局：结局带来了一种战胜困难的感觉，戴维在同学们真诚的欢呼声中完成了比赛。老师为戴维的决心感到自豪，看到故事对戴维和周围人的积极影响。整体结构：故事遵循经典的故事结构，具有明确定义的导言，推动叙述向前发展的触发事件，上升动作建立紧张感，高潮发生在起跑线，回落动作展示了戴维的参与，结局突显了战胜困难的成就感。高考真题范文（163words）：Wesatdowntogetheronsomesteps,butDavidwouldn’tlookatme.Iturnedhimaroundandlookedhimintheeyesincerely.Iquietlysaid,“David,ifyou’renotrunningbecauseyou’reafraidsomeoneisgoingtolaugh,that’snotagoodenoughreason.Areyougoingtoletthemgetinyourway?Ifyoureallywanttorun,David,run!”IheldmybreathasDavidtookthisin.Thenhelookedatthefieldandsaidwithafiercebutquietdetermination,“I’mgonnarun.”IwatchedasDavidmoveduptothestartingline.Thestarter’sgunsounded.Buthehadonlygoneafewmetresbeforehetrippedandfellflatontheground.Myheartsank.AsIstartedtoshoutencouragement,othervoicesaroundmetookupthecall.“eonDavid,youcandoit!”Davidpickedhimselfupandstartedagainuntilhecrossedthefinishlinetowildcheersandapplause.下水作文1：Wesatdownnexttoeachother,butDavidwouldn'tlookatme.【Theatmospherearoundusbuzzedwith(~withsth充满兴奋或活动等)excitementastheotherchildrenstretchedandchatted,eagerlyanticipatingthecrosscountryrun.】IcouldsenseDavid'suneaseanddecidedtobreakthesilence."Hey,David,"Ibegangently,"you'vebeenpracticingsohardforthis.Areyousureyouwanttosititout?"Hefinallylookedup,hiseyesrevealingamixofdisappointmentandembarrassment."Idon'twantpeopletoseemestruggle,"headmitted,hisvoicebarelyaboveawhisper.I【placedareassuringhandonhisshoulder,】assuringhimthateveryonewouldbecheeringforhim,justliketheyalwaysdid.IwatchedasDavidmoveduptothestartinglinewiththeotherrunners.【Theforestloomedahead,itsdensecanopyfilteringsunlightontothewindingtrail.Theairwasfilledwiththeearthyscentofpine,creatingaserenebackdropfortheimpendingrace.环境描写（森林在前方隐现，浓密的树冠过滤阳光洒在蜿蜒曲折的小径上。空气中弥漫着松树的泥土香气，为即将到来的比赛创造了宁静的背景。）】Asthecoachsignaledthestart,Davidtookadeepbreath,hisdeterminationshiningthrough.Hisclassmates,whohadnoticedhisabsence,begancheeringloudly【,encouraginghimtodohisbest.】Ioverheardoneofthechildrensaying,"Go,David!Yougotthis!"Thegenuinesupportwarmedmyheart.Despitethechallengeshefaced,Davidpushedforward,embodyingresilienceinthefaceofadversity.我一般上课会给学生较长的范文，主要是为了让他们多读一些好词好句，誊抄范文的时候，我会要求学生在不打乱情节的情况下自行删减，这样也可以锻炼他们精简语言的能力。下水文2（161words）：Wesatdownnexttoeachother,butDavidwouldn'tlookatme.IcouldsenseDavid'suneaseanddecidedto

breakthesilence.（动作描写）"Hey,David,"Ibegangently,"you'vebeenpracticingsohardforthis.Areyousureyouwanttosititout?"（对话）Hefinallylookedup,hiseyes

revealing

amixofdisappointmentandembarrassment.（心理描写）"Idon'twantpeopletosee